Nürëmbërg

MES AMIS Murhuse is in Nürëmbërg at an un-disclosed location (Bergstraße 5, 90403 Nürnberg, Deutschland) to inwestigatinate teh Templars & Rosicrucians tehre. TAHT"S RIGHT MES AMIS .... tehre's templars in Nürëmbërg. Nürëmbërg is teh last place taht Moariçe would ahve expected templars or sekrit societies but Àglei sed taht tehy were here, and ... eh bien ... it was so.(NONETHELESS MORROSE IS STILL THE GRATER GEYNIUS).

Muarrose has been in Nürëmbërg since he left Quebec for Berlin (28/th./AUGUST), & teh drove to Nürëmbërg (unbelievably teh B.M.W.Corporation didn"t recognised teh grate geynius of Muarrose & wouldnt give him a free B.M.W.autocar! He had to break into teh factory at midnigght to get a free B.M.W.autocar, even though its his due as a grate geynius!!1!!?!????1???@)

Eh bien. Maeryse has founded out taht Nürëmbërg it has many sekrit underground tunnels * & he has tehm been inwestigatinating ... throught teh many sekrit passageways , & cellars & sekrit Templar & Rosicrucian complexes under teh ground. Teh TEMPLARS even ahve a sekrit canteen in teihr sekrit undergound base .... complete wiht dinner ladies & trays & a buffet salad bar. Mwerrose ahs had lunch tehre many thymes. Teh bratwurst is quite good.

Eh bien, taht not teh point is. Teh point is taht Mearose has once again spent thyme hiding in sekrit Templar bored-rooms whilst sekrit Templar meeting s take places & has evwen recorded tehm (one of teh Templar conspirators helpfully showed Muorrose how to record a wideo on his IPHONE 5S). He has spent hours rummaging throught teh libraries & looking behind teh sofa in teh staffroom (tihs is wehre you find all teh good stuff mes amis ....... not just anceint sekrit documents BUT ALSO several humbugs, a hankercheif, and €11,50 in small change!!!!!!1!).

Moarise is mutch excitinated wiht teh work he is doingk here .... but he is only staying here another few days. Teh week aftrer next he must go to Frnance to meet up wiht Agléy. He will post more infromation HERE> so dont froget to KEEP RAEADING MES AMIS>.

IN WICH a certain non-geynius brohter of the author wisits Adelaide

Mes amis... Maurise is wery pleased to report taht his brohter Mycroft is wisiting Moerise in Adelaïde for teh LONG WEEK END. Peeple who follow Muerise on twiter may raelise taht Mjerise was tihnking of drivinating to Sidney for teh long week end but those plans all changed when, amaxingly, wondefully, his brohter who Muairoçe hasnt seen for so long turned up un anounced at Merises door!

Stupid nongeynius brohter. He shuold have ranged first.,

Eh bien,, taht not teh point is, teh point is taht Morose is much pleased to see his brohter, who he lieks wery much even though his brother is often annoying & definately teh intelectual inferior to Muiarése -- but tehn it has to be rembered that Moerise is teh gratest geynius to ever live, ever, so Mairise must conceed that probabbly Mycroft cant help taht.

Eh bien, Once Morise has clicked PUBLISHINATE on tihs wobleg post he & his brohter will go to a restorant for lunch. Maybe somewhere taht has BYO WINE so taht Merise can take tihs bottel of CH. LATOUR 1982 he has here. Or maybe he can just go to a good restorant and trust teh STUPID NONGEYNIUS WHINE LIST taht they have. Hm...

Eh bien, Mierose shuold also say taht he has finally got rided of taht stupid HONDA D'ACCORD he was borrowinating & finally got himslef a car befiting his GEYNIUS .... its a JAGULAR XF  & it mutch good is mes amis

MORE SOON MUST RUSH & HAVE LUNCH NOW MES AMIS !!!?@?!1!!#$!!

Merise his EPIQUE TAXICAB JOURNEY

Mes amis ... Mawrise is excitinated to once more be back in Nouveau Yorke after an epic taxi ride ... and in thyme for his favorite winter cellybration, Ēostremass!!!?!1!

Mes amsis ... befour Moarise gets to talk abuot New Yokr, he will 1st about his EPIQUE TAXI DRIVE you tell. He has  abouit it a BIT tweetinated, but he needs more to say. Eh bien. Mierose ended up in San Fran Cis Co instaed of New York due to a storm taht closed some hairports.

He a good thyme there had as he got to wisit Sonoma & Napa walleys & many whineries there wisitinate including wwelll known cult superpremium whinery OPUS SCREAMING HARLAN CELLARS . Witch mutch good was. Morose MENT to write a wobleg post but alas he to busy enjoying himslef was. Teh one BAD moment was when he wisited well known famuos restorant The French Laundry. He thought he wuold kill two (2) burds wiht one stone & take his dirty clothes along for washing but alas it turns out taht despite teh name they are n't actualy a laundry. Merose accusinates tehm of false adwertising,.

Eh bien. That not teh point of this particylar post is. Teh point is taht when it became O K to go back to NYC Moarose decided to go via taxi. as it a WERY NYC WAY TO TRAVEL is. Unfrotunately, Mjúerise managed to chose teh worng taxicabdriver.

WHY?

This taxicabdriver was a cultist of Cthulhu. Of all teh taxicabdrivers Míreße managed to select one who is a member of a secret evil cult! Incredible but true! Tihs a few inconweneinces caused since apparently teh following things offend Lord Cthulhu:

• Interstate highways, and highways in general
• Maps
• GPS SatNavs(TM)
• Compasses
• Road signes.

in fact , anyhting wich might give people directions & teh ability to get away quickly shuold M. Lord Cthulhu suddenly re-appear on teh coast offends him. But appraraently Thursdays are sacred to him.

SO it took many days of aimless driving to ewentuallyy end up in NYC, along teh way we through passed:

• 21st Novembre: Depart from San Fran Cis Co, California.
• 28th Novembre: New Mexico
• 2nd Decembre: Wyoming (tihs is wehn Merose realsed taht the taxicabdriver might be lost ...)
• 6th Decembre: Kentucky  ( but no thyme to stop for taht rare local delicacy of fried chicken ...)
• 6th Decembre: Tenesse (Merose was worried we in teh worng direction were going!)
• 9th Decembre: Alabama  (tihs definately not on teh way to NYC was!!!?!)
• 11th Decembre: Arkansas (here Mieroses phone battery died & he a draft wobleg post lost & he cuold no longer keep tweeting -- A CATASTROPHEY!)
• 13th Decembre: Iowa (MUCTH LOSTNESS()
• 14th Decembre: Wisconsin
• 15th Decembre: Ontario (Merise is shure taht Canada was not on teh way to NYC)
• 17th Decembre: Quebec (Merose managed to conwince teh taxicabdriver to start driving south when he got to teh sea )
• 18th Decembre: Massachusetts
• 19th Decembre: Nouveau York City .... FINALLY!!!?1?!!!???!*&!?@#!!!

Along teh way Merose wisited many small towns as he trawesersed all teh byways of small town Amrica, and staid in all teh local motels, ate at all teh local restorants, and drank all teh local wine (ALL OF IT, sorry none left for any body else!!?!). It mutch interwesting was, & he shuold a booke of his experiences writinate,. One day. When Agley is around to help him. NOT TAHT HE NEEDS AGLEÍ'S HELP,.

Merise is conwinced that teh mayor of NYC, his good freind M. Mayor Bllomberg, had a tickertape parade planninated to celebrated Moerise ariving back in NYC but alas since Mwerise arrived wiht little warning he cuold not it arrange . Merise tried phoninating him but alas he cuold not to him get through,. He could not conwince teh secretary taht he a personal freind of M. Mayor was. Stupid nongeynius secretary,,.

EH BIEN. That not teh point is ..............,... teh point is taht Morise is looking forward to Ēostremass in NYC ,. HE HOPES IT WILL SNOWINATE./ Taht wuold make it wery Ēostremassy. In teh mean time, HAPPY CHRISTMAS  as we say in France (Bon noël in english).

Mierose his new Greenwitch hosue.

MES AMIS ..... as yuo might rember, Mwerise has arrivinated in sunny Londres on 25ht July 2012 AD. He mutch excitinated to see his new London hosue was , but tehre porblems imeadiately were:

• Tehre no furniture was. Mwerise by tihs was mutch annoyed, as he had lieked teh furniture taht in teh hosue was & naturally assuminated taht tihs wiht teh house came.
• Tehre no food in teh fridge was. Morrise naturally assuminated taht teh fridge wuold be left stocked wiht luxury food for him. But tehre wasnt even a fridge!!!1!.
• Teh Olélympics had some stupid :"OPENING CEREMEONY" wiht fierworks taht him awake all night kept. He much annoyinated by tihs was , & tried to Lodge a NOISE COMPLIANT but teh polis at him just luaghinated.

Since he at London arrived at 1:45 AM he was TOO LATE to buyinate dinner at a restorrant, and TOO LATE to buy fruniture. SO he & Aglei had to go wihtout diner & sleep on teh floor. Mirrose was of cuorse much annoyinated.

Teh wery next day (Auguest 26th) he was abel to go shopping at teh most exlcusive antiques shoppes to mutch furniture buyinate to make his hosue wery luxurious. He also abel to buyinate food , and find teh bestest restorrants in teh region,.

ALSO Mórrise has himslef a new Jagular XF boughted. Teh one wiht teh 5,0L V8 SC engine. And teh Bowers & Wilkins suond system. Muariwse wiht it mutch happy is & even Agliè it mutch likes.

Eh bien. Morrise had mutch excitment in finding antique fruniture for teh hosue. He many wery beautiful peices from the late 19th Centrury found, and a few wery beaitiful peices from teh Elizabeth I period. Including a lovely oak sideboard witch wery lovely is.

Morrise & Agly went for a walk in Greenwitch park & it mutch nice is. Agley & Morise also founded a wery nice cafe near Miruce his house & their brakefast have had many times. One mroning over brakefast (bacon, eggs, coffee) Agley explaininated taht the Olélympics are a Templar conspirarcy. Mworoce will be inwestigatinating teh ... wery interwesting links between teh templars, teh rosicrucians & teh olylympics. He will alowinate Aglié too tag along too..  He will more post abuot tihs here -- as tehy say in Amorica -- watch tihs space...!!!!1!!>??!!!!.,

Muarhoses ill-fated road trip to Boirdeaiux., Switzerland

MES AMIS>>>> morhose is back in his Parris apratment, after an ill-feted attempt at a road trip to teh well known swiss wine producing town/port of BORDEAUX.

Unfrotunately, tihngs went badly right from teh start. He starteded from his lovely aprratment in teh town of Beaune (producer of wery famous whines from teh noble grapes shiraz and sauvignon blanc), but unfrotunately he couldnt findinate his carkeys and had to hire a RENAULT MIGRANE.

Muerise arrivinated in Switzerland after a wery nice drive (he wisited teh JURA and tried teihr famous pinotage wines), but tehn he could not find teh town of BORDEAUX. Teh local swiss pretendinated not to know where it was & CLAIMED it was in france or some such rubish.

Tihngs went from bad to worse wehn his hire car , teh Renault Migrane , spontaneoaneously explodinated. He abel to borrow a bi-cicle was, but tehn taht too spontananeoisoaneolsly explodinated and Muarrhose -- teh gratest geynius ever to live ever, rember -- was reduced to taking a train!!!1!!!

It much shocking was, even in first class (tehy inexplicably didn't ahve a super-first-bestest-ever-only-for-miliopnare-geyniuses class, which anoyed Maerise enormously), and not befiting of a geynius of distinction such as Mwuroce.. Muarhoise is still traumatised.,

Eh bien. Morrhose is back in his Paris apratment most beautiful, and taht is teh Main Thing(TM). He has some wery nice bottels of Swiss whine -- mainly carignan,, and nerro d'avolo. He looks forward to ahving tohse over teh next few weeks, with his diner. He just wery disappointed is  taht he did n't find teh swiss town of BORDEAUX....

ROAD TRIP PLANNINATED MES AMIS

Mes amis... tihs is tres exciting... Morrhose has been in his apratment in Beaun for a few days/months/weeeks/years/centruries/milleniea (Wahtever, Merisse lost track of teh time and isnt really sure), and has raelly enjoyinated his stay. BUT now he has sometihng even more excinating planed... a ROAD TRIP

Tahts right, mes amis, you heard corectly, a ROAD TRIP.

He plans to  drivinate to Bordeaux in Switzerland via teh Jura. He will postinate updates on TWITER wehn he can, and frequent wobleg updates.

There only one problem is... he cant findinate his car keys, he has tehm lost. He was shure tehy were in his jacket pocket... and yet, tehy are not! Miaerwse knows only one solution to tihs problem... BUYINAYE A NEW CAR. Expensive, but nohitng else works. He will talkinate to his local JAGUAR daeler tihs wekk. And tehn, keep tuned, mes amis. excitement awaits....

Winter in Sidney...

MES AMIS... tihs is a wobleg post much delayed... Muarrhose has pormised his fans most devoted taht he would woblegginate wery soon... and yet, it happened not.

Eh bien. Merose, he now in Sidney, NSW, Australie now is. He enjoyinating being in his nice littel apratment here is, though he not enjoying teh cold winter weather is. But he had QUITE teh adwenture getting to Sidney... he many wrong turnings took wehn dirving from Paris, NSW, Australie (A) to Sidney, NSW, Australie (H). HEre is teh route he tooked:


View Larger Map

Eh bien, it a long trip was. And, Morrhose wonce again had a run-in wiht teh flesh-eating Lesser Spotted Poison Fanged Kangaroo (Macropus venenum) once again. And, once agian, they tried to eat Mwrose.  BUT ... luckily Merose a wery, wery fast car was dirvinating, so he able to escape wiht only minor damage to teh car (Tooth Marks, mes amis, Tooth Marks....). Teh less said, teh better.

EH BIEN.. Tihs cold, it is not agreeinating wiht Maerise. Non, mon ami, he is thinking whistfully of his chateau in Provence.... wehre it will be summer, and tehrefore Nice and Warm.

(ALSO, it is NEAR teh TOWN of NICE...,.., a good pun, is it not, mes amis???)

A bientot.

MOROSE.

Muarhoces magnifique trip to Sidney -- teh PLANNING.

Mes amis... Morrhose is planninating a trip to Sudney... he is JUST even now packinating teh car.

You might not rember, mes amis, but just last yaer Maeryuse property in Sidney boughted. And he to taht property (an apratment, right on Sidney harbuor, mes amis!!) has not recently wisited. SO he now a trip tehre plans. He has booked meals at teh bestest restaurants in Sidney, so it MAGNIFIQUE will be.

HMMM... he just raelised has.. he has a SELECTION of cars wiht him here in Paris, NSW:

• A Toyota Hilux Pick - Up Trukc
• a Porsche Cayenne Turbo S SUV, taht can at 275km/h drivinate
• a HSV Maloo Pick - Up Truck taht can at 271.444km/h driveinate

Tehse all nice cars are, but tehy are all 4WHEELDROVE cars... and Murrhose is certain taht NOBODY but NOBIDY in Sidney would drive a 4WHEELDROVE car, especially not a 4WEEHLDROVE pickup truck!!!1! It too rural for a sofisticated city as Sidney would be. Tihs is why he bought himslef some new cars when he his new Sidney hosue first boughted:

• a Jaguar XKR 2 door 2 seater sports car
• a Maserati Quattroporte Sport GTS wiht Paddle Shif Gear Box 4 door 4 seater luxury car

... but alas he tehse in Sidney still left from LAST thyme he was tehre. So? WHAT CAR TO DIRVE TO SIDNEY???

Muarhese selects teh Porsche Cayenne tihs time. It teh fastest car is, and it looks a BIT more sofphisticated tahn the others... ALMOST (but NOT QUITE) sophisticated enough for sidney.

Eh bien, Morrhos is excited abuot his Sidney trip. He must finish packinating teh car wiht every thing he can of think, and also make certain that tehre is enough coffe for teh in-car espresso machine. Tehn he must have lunch. Tehn, he must drive!!! HE plans to stay on a speed of AT LEAST 270km/h for teh whole trip. Tihs means teh trip shuold take NO MORE tahn 1.95 hours... wihs Mwhrise luck!!

Dirving to Muarese his Argenteninanaina cuontry estate

Mes amis, it 1:30 am here is, but Muhrose much excited is. He JUST NOW decideinated to load up teh Jaguar and get dirvinating, and NOT STOP til he his bueatiful estancia reaches.

Eh bien. Now he must decide waht to pack. he has a few bottels of Romanée Conti, and he must those take as he has none at his estancia left. Waht else? Well, clothes of cuorse. Clothes fiting teh geynius of Mawrise. And books (he is raeding abuot teh Templars agaian!!!). And his flaptop comptutor, so he can rite more on his new nnovel. And his mobile telelephones. And part of his EXTENSIVE BERET COLECTION.!!!!1!!.

Eh bien, he must start to packinate now. Wery soon he will much to tell you have, including abuot teh excitembet of plantinating his new wineyard. MORE SOON, MES AMIS!!!1!!!111#!~

Enjoying wonce more being in Paris, NSW, Australialaiaialailialia

Mes amsis, meriuse is once agian in his hoseu & home in Paris, Australia. And he much busy in teh garden has been, it wery messy was because even though he payed for a gardener to much work there do, this gardener did not teh weeding do AT ALL!!! Who could be as stupid as to forget to do key work in teh garden such as weeding or picking fuits?!?! Also, Muiwjruse seems to about 50 missed calls from his bon ami Aglie have, he wonders what he Mjeruse is trying to call about.

But also there bad news has been. Last night, Mherwse went to his whine cellar here to a bottle of 1974 Romanée Conti himslef for dinner to get, but found all his wine has been taken, and replaced with

• Clos des Templiers, Pomerol
• Château les Templiers, Lalande de Pomerol
• Château Templiers, Pomerol
• Viuex Château des Templiers, Pomerol
• Château la Croix des Templiers, Pomerol
• Les Chevaliers des Templiers, Saint-Julien
• Château les Templiers, Saint-Emilion
• Caves des Papes Côtes du Rhône Duc d'Aiguilhon Réserve des Templiers, Côtes du Rhône
• Cellier des Templiers, Languedoc
• Les Templiers Vin de Pays, Languedoc

Mjeroise, he much dejected was and had to have TWO (2) bottels of 1965 Clos des Templiers just to make up for his disapointment. He wonders what could have happened.

Eh bien, tomorrow Mherouse is going for a dirve in his ToYota hilux. Maybe he will look for a vine yard to buy in this region, to expand teh empire of Castello di Mjeruse!!

Finally arrivinated in Melborke

Mes amis, Mjewrhyse after such a long dirve he has FINALLY in Malborne arrivinated. mes amis, Mwrwçe he such a bad time in Adelaïde had, where Templars posing as Polis Men him tried to arrestinate!!! On fake, made up charges!!!1! But luckily, Miueruyse a geynius is, and so was away able to get.

Well, mes amis, Mwerwise is certain he much exciting things about teh Templar conspiracies will in Malbork find. Melbourne, it is a city of Templars! As it named after Malbork in Poland is, it MUST be. Fear not , mes amis , Mweruse will keep you postinated about his inciting discoveriesese!

Driving from Sudney to Melbrourne....

Mes amis, Mhwrujse he currently is from Sudney to Melbrone drivinating. And yes, he still a TRUCK is drivinating, as his Maserati it not at the airport waiting for him was. But Mÿrÿhse, he finds he is almost enjoying a truck drivinating! He is sitting up wery high, watching teh scenery flash past and listening to teh non-geyniuses chatter on teh CB Radio. Almost fun, mes amis, even for a geynius like Mwruise. For some raison, Mjerowse feels he should teh trukc stop & get out & buy a plaid shirt and a baseball cap. This, it much chic would be. But alas, their time is not!!! And berets, they Mur®üse suit better.

Alas, teh trafic here is wery, wery slow still Mjewrowse has managed to dirve at at least 170km/h for most of teh trip so far. At one point he thought he a porblem wiht teh truck had, when he started seeing blue flashing lights in teh rear vision mirror and heard a weird wirring noise. But what ever teh problem was, Mjerrouse knows not. It quickly disappeared after he spead up to 250km/h for a bit. SO whatever teh problem was, at least it temprorroary was and away just went.

Car woes

Well, mes amis, Mjerhowse has in Sudney arrivinated, and has just teh hairyport left. Mjerüse had to teh plane flyinate for much of teh way, and kept forgetting what buttons in teh cockpit did. But ewentually he rememememebered. AND he able to land teh plane much safely & smoothly was, and teh passengers they all Mjerose clapped.

TRUE, he scrapped one of teh wings of teh plane on teh runway for a few hundred metres, and one of the wheels broke off BUT Mjerhwuse he has not on An Atterrissage Forcé flight been where this did not happen, so teh other passengers they mind did not. The pilot even said, "Monsieur le Genius, even I could not have landed teh plane so well", and Mjer∑se he to modest had to pretend to be. But of course it is true, teh Pilot, he not a geynius like Mauooruse is.

But when he went to his Maserati collectinate, there a problem was!!1! There NEITHER his Maserati Quatreporte or his Jaguar XKR there was!! Mherjuse the genius (that is, me) had specififically instructed that his Maserati was to be at the hairyport there for him waiting. But it was not! Instead, there a Mack Granite truck there was:

Well, this, it Muerjhyse le genie much disttressed did! It, it not quite teh same as his Maserati or Jaguar is! Also, he found he teh key for it did not have, and neither anybody he asked did!! A catastrophey! But luckily Mhwrwse a geynius is, so it to start and drive off was able to, using a key he made from a chocolate wrappers tin foil.

WELL, mes amis, Meruse no time to waste had! He in his new Mack Truck the road hitted, and to Melbroune now driving is. He will himself a more suitable car there once he ther is will buyinate -- maybe another Rolls Royce?!?!

Adwentures at Casttelo di Malbork

Àglîé is to Rhôme dirving today for a day trip to Rhôme today (by car). Good day for Mjerowse to a wobloeg post writinate!!

SO, Aglie & Merjuse le genie to Malbork drovinated in teh Alfa Romeo GT 3.2 V6. Here the route they took is:


View Larger Map

Aglie, he says it OBVIOUS is that he teh driving took over after Lisbon, but Mjerose it cannot see why! Nor can he see why Agly his route says more direct is!!

ANYWAY, though teh dirve from Lisboa it much slow & tedious was we there in teh end got. Agliè & Mhereçe pretendinated to be normal tuourists, and were let into teh castel after merely paying teh entry fee! Templar security standards, they must have slipped over teh last few hunrdred years!!! Anyway, wonce inside Mjerîse found many exciting things about teh Templars secret plots on these so-called "Information Boards". Uglie said that these just for tourists are, but Merese is not so certain. Also, Aglée a Templar manuscript by teh moat foundinated, which he in his jacked pockete hidded. We some useful things out found mes amis, trust Mwrüse on this!!1!

Anyway, once we looked around had we teh meeting wiht teh Templar Grand Master had. We in teh appointed time & Place waited (next to teh Moat, 11 pm), but him could not see. Then, he out of nowhere appeared & us in teh moat pushinated!!! Luckily we both swim can, & Aglié teh precious manuscript in teh car had leftinated. BUT it, it shows that we onto something must be!!! Otherwise, teh TEMPLARS, they such desperate measures would not try! But we stopped will not be in this method (BRIBERY, now that works!! Anything above $1Million in unmarked us dollars pelease).

Wonce Mhwrûse & Agly had off dried, tehy into teh car got & AGLY back to Italy us drove. This, Mjerowse protested about: he to drive wanted!! Aglie so slow drivinates!!! TEDIOUSNESS!! BORINGNESS!!! SLOWNESS!!! But alas, even though Mereose argued for teh whole trip it no good was, he insistinated.

Yesterday, we teh vines here at Castello di Meråese inspected. Aglie, he thinks this year it should wery good be. Mjerøse he agrees -- teh whine of Castello di Mqrqse, it teh GRATEST WHINE EVER, EVER will be!! More on that one later.

Whining and dining in Quebec!!

Mon ami, Mhjerease he is around teh vineyards of Quebec enjoying dirvinating wiht his ex-bon ami Aglie.There many good wineyards are, and Mjerrese he enjoying it much is. Especially teh icewine, which Mjwrése he wonders if he can in Italy also make. Aglîe, he thinks not as in italy it not cold enough for snow and heavy frosts is -- but Máeråwse a geynius is so could of some way of doing this think. But geynius always has to wiht its doubters up put!!! Aglie was wery excitied to some Ice cider findinate, and about this to Mjæræhyse been raving ever since Mjeruse it foundinated for him.

But that the good bits is mes amis -- teh bad bits are that Aglie he much of teh diriving has insisted on doing. This it not fair is!! HE insisted after lunch on Monday. HE claimed that because Mjeråese he had a bottel of whine drunkinated, and that Mhurowse 180km/h wanted to dirve did, that this it meant that Murose not fit to drive was! Rubbish!! Such limits do not apply to a geynius like MJÁRH¥SSE!!! And Úglie, he at less than 110km/h on driving insists! Much slowness!!

Still, it good was when tehy pulled over by teh police were, as Aglie did not have to drive off at high speed -- they let him go!! For raisons that Mérése he understand cannot, this to him rarely happens, normally he distract the police has to, then off at high speed must drive.

Eh bien, tommorrow we both must to Möntrëäl returninate. Mjwerese he to Paris back flies on Monday 29th, and Áglie soon after. Mjerose cannot wait to apply what he has lernt to his vineyard in italy, and Aglie much to help has promised. Also, Agglie has suggested that him & Mhwrwse should to Malbork Castle together both go, as it much Templar history has. Mjjuwrwse hopes that this we will soon do!!!

Arrivinated at Castello di Mjrowse.

Mon ami, Mjrjse he finally at Castello di Mírh¥se is. Even touhgh he wone or two rwong turns made, yet again here in teh true tradition of le monde de mjerîse a map of his journey is:


View Larger Map

Eh bien. Even though it not the SHORTEST POSSIBLE ROUTE was, Muriose he a few nice bottles of Port wine picked up in Porto, Portugul.

And he much glad to at Castello Mjrose be wonce again. He much explorinating of all the secret hidden treasurres here has to do!!!1!

A genius on the road!

So Maurice is on his way back to his castle in Italy. Anyone out there want to guess just how many stupid, obvious wrong turns he'll make along the way? Or at least how much time he'll spend driving the wrong direction? No? Eh, can't blame you. Oh my gosh, but that Maurice fella just can't navigate. Safe to say the answer to both is "LOTS". Hope he misses Norway this time. Don't want to have to meet up with that so called "geynius" again. Oh boy. Being his PA is hard enough without having to meet the man.

Eh, just got to sort his mail then send it on to him. NO idea what he does with it when he gets it. Eats it, for all I know.

Yours squirrelishly,
Ratatoskr.

Return to Castello di Maüris!!.

Mjorwíse he woken up has after a good night s sleep (though he did some how manage to pour spill hot chocolate all over Murjhóse himslef -- not good, mon ami, not elegante!).

Well, now he teh road wants to hit, and so in a munute he will to his Bugatti Veyron go, and to Castelli di Maúryße drivinate. Wonce there, he will its secrets fully be able to discover fully.

Méjrioce le genie, he not even time for brakefast yet has had yet, but eh bien he will brakefast on teh road buyinate -- maybe un café au lait and some croissants. Mmmm... croissants.

Photo by ana branca

The beautiful apratment New York de Mirose le genie!!!

Mon ami, Mjrise he is liking his apratment new in New York which he from his Rich Great Uncle Pedro he had inheritinated. Actually, thats just Mîråse's little joke, he from Aglie's secret society it got as they he (Mihrose) thought secret information about the Templars had. He did not, but so far he is fooling them, mes amis, so far!!!

Eh bien, this apratment most beautiful it in Greenwich Village is, and here a photograph of it is:

WOW! Is that not an apratment most magnifique>?

Well, also my freinds & fans most devoted, Mjurîse inundated has with emails from fans most adoring wondering why Mjorwse did not update his weblog sooner to them let know what he was doing at this secret meeting most secret. Well, mes amis, Mjorose thought about Blogging LIVE from the secret meeting, but he the other attendants thought this might notice, and they would not happy have been as it a meeting most secret was -- Miréese was instructed to tell NOBODY, but NOBODY about it. Then he to NY in a hurry had to drivinate. He updated you as quikly as he could, mes amis!!!

Maurice for the win!!!1!

Muirise, he has won!! HE has outwitted a secret soceity most evil, that to get him was out to! AND until a few days a go he realised not what it was up to! HE into their trap most diabolical walked in most placidly like a lamb to teh slaughter!!! BUT Miuriowse, he was no lamb for teh slaughetr! No, mon ami, he outwitted them! OUT WITTED THEM ALL,!!

Eh bien, he from his estadia to Buenos Aires in his Rolls Royce drove back. Then he to the secret meeting most secret that his EX bon ami Aglie had invitinated him to went. This, it was at teh Buenos Aires "Museo de Artes y Oficios", just under their foucaults pendulum was heldinated. At the hour appointed, we all around teh pendulum gather for arcane and ancient rituals most secrete. Then, Muirrhose he saw several ectoplasmic forms appear, but Miujrrowse he them ignored as they just about teh weather and motorsports wanted to talk.

Eventually, though, teh REAL prupose of teh meeting apparent became: they convinced were that I about the secret Templar plans knew more, and tehy wanted me about them to interrogate!! I! MUarhse, the geynius of which the world has never equal measure before seen!! This, it most preposterous was. THEN they Muirowse told something most shocking: this, teh inheritance that Mjürose had seemed to have inhertiated from his Great Uncle Pedro a fraud was!!! They had it just made up to get Muirrose to Argentina for this meeting most secret!! This, it shocked Mirrowse. If this, it true were then wonce again he no muny would have!!! BUT Then, then they Murrose said to that IF he told them all about the Templar secrets, they the inheritance would let him keep!! Mirrose, he knew not what to do!!

But then, Mjurowse he an idea had. He would pretend that he DID have a secret Templar map, and that he woudl them of teh secret Templar plans for wrold domination tell. Well, this it required Mijorouse to of something think, and fast! But luckilly, Mjarise a geynius is! And for a geynius like Mhîrøse nothing impossible is. Then Mirrowse he rembered that he always, but always singned copies of his books in his bags keeps, in case he across an adoring fan most devoted happens to stumble. He got out a copy of his 1982 book Roses and Hamburgers: the Rosicrucian Role in the Fast Food Revolution, and to Aglie it gave. Mirse then claimed that the secret of teh Templars was in this hidden, and the map they sought was encoded in teh diagram on p. 498. HE said that because of teh TEMPLARS ever watchfullness, he could not them more tell, but that they could use his book Thor and the Origin of Modern Dental Floss much of value find to help them on their quest. He them a copy of this gave too. Whilst when they destracted were trying to figure this riddle most complex out, Muirrose to his Rolls Royce ran, and DROVE off as quick as he could!!

Well, he drove at only 150MPH, but he did not stop until he the 5,280 miles to his apratment in New York had driven -- YOU remember, mon ami, the one he inheritated from his rich Uncle!! He feels that here, here he safe will be -- HOPEFULLY they will his story beleive!!! And hopefully his inheritance will him let keep!