Monday 29 June 2009

BAck to Parys, mon amis

Oh noes! Today Mjúrhwse he must back to Paris, France flyinate. He teh flight is not forward to looking, mes amis!! Still, it over in a few hours will be.

Wonce he back in PAris is, then he will a few days in his Rue Mouffetarde apartment stay to Rest&Relax. Then he & his no-longer-good-friend Aglie will to Castello di Mauruse drivinate, and for more evidence of Templar histroy look. They hope also to drive to Malbork Castle togther at some point too also!! In any case, Mjuéerhyse he will infromed you keep.

Friday 26 June 2009

Whining and dining in Quebec!!

Mon ami, Mhjerease he is around teh vineyards of Quebec enjoying dirvinating wiht his ex-bon ami Aglie.There many good wineyards are, and Mjerrese he enjoying it much is. Especially teh icewine, which Mjwrése he wonders if he can in Italy also make. Aglîe, he thinks not as in italy it not cold enough for snow and heavy frosts is -- but Máeråwse a geynius is so could of some way of doing this think. But geynius always has to wiht its doubters up put!!! Aglie was wery excitied to some Ice cider findinate, and about this to Mjæræhyse been raving ever since Mjeruse it foundinated for him.

But that the good bits is mes amis -- teh bad bits are that Aglie he much of teh diriving has insisted on doing. This it not fair is!! HE insisted after lunch on Monday. HE claimed that because Mjeråese he had a bottel of whine drunkinated, and that Mhurowse 180km/h wanted to dirve did, that this it meant that Murose not fit to drive was! Rubbish!! Such limits do not apply to a geynius like MJÁRH¥SSE!!! And Úglie, he at less than 110km/h on driving insists! Much slowness!!

Still, it good was when tehy pulled over by teh police were, as Aglie did not have to drive off at high speed -- they let him go!! For raisons that Mérése he understand cannot, this to him rarely happens, normally he distract the police has to, then off at high speed must drive.

Eh bien, tommorrow we both must to Möntrëäl returninate. Mjwerese he to Paris back flies on Monday 29th, and Áglie soon after. Mjerose cannot wait to apply what he has lernt to his vineyard in italy, and Aglie much to help has promised. Also, Agglie has suggested that him & Mhwrwse should to Malbork Castle together both go, as it much Templar history has. Mjjuwrwse hopes that this we will soon do!!!

Saturday 20 June 2009

KIDNAPPED!! by teh TEMPLARS!! At least, that the story Mjurhowse Ugliè will tell is.

Anyway mon ami Aglie he is coming to Montreal to Muruse see and teh routes des vins together dirivinate arround in Mjerhyse his hired Rolls Royce. But Merrowse, he not yet to Aglie has explained why and how he teh meeting of teh secret society most secret in a hurry unexpectidly left. Muirowse, he does not want Uglie to think that Murriwse lefft  as he them was fooling, and need to get away before they found out. But what to say??!?!

AHAH! That, it is it, mes amis! Mjuroswe, he will them tell that he kidnapped by teh templars was! YES mon ami, that geynius Murrowse he can see it all now -- that is why he a grate geynius is. He will them tell that the Templars kidnapped Mearrowse when the secret society mememebrs there backs were turned. This, this will let Mjuroase off teh hook. Also, it them will make think that the claims de Muirhyse, they MUST be genuine. OR why would teh templars him try to kindapinate?

Then he them will tell how Muirrowse the Grand MAster outwitted, and away got. Such a tale of genuisness, daring and great inteeligence!! It almost a pity it true is not.

Mjaerwose, a Rolls Royce Phantom, and teh Routes des Vins du Canada!

Mes amis, Mjerrhîse he still in Móntréál in is, and he here for MORE than one more week is and he much excitited about this is!! Tomorrow, he for a trip along teh routes des vins wich in Quebec are whihc are region of the Eastern Townships, Montérégie, Central Quebec, Quebec, Lanaudière and the Lower Laurentians and teh region of region of Brome-Missisquoi. Mwaereawse, he wait cannot!! He is sure that he, he will much about whine making find out, which will him in his estate in italy help wiht,. So Mjerroese hhe has himslef a Rolls Royce Phantom hirinated so that he a car in wihc to therre drive has!!

And the exciting thing, mes amis, is that Mqrhyse he alone is not going! No, mes amis, his ex-bon ami Aglie will be wiht Mhurwise coming.

Aglié Mjarase on his French iPhone (phone number +33 6 err...) rang earlier this week, to find out to Mjrjuse whjat happened had after he from teh secret society secret meeting disapprearinated. Murwose, he did not want to admit that he had them tricked, and that he he from them ran away and now he porbabaly should not keep teh muny they him gave. OH no! He not any of it giving back is. Also, AGlie he useful could be in Mjorose his plan to determine teh history of his Templar castle. But now Mearwse him he does not trust. This Agley, he up to no good is.

When Ugliè he herd that Mjurose in Canada was, he to come over and visit offred. He suggested that we, we BOTH could along teh route des vins dirvinate together!! A good idea, mon ami, but Myrose teh dirving will do. He does not teh drivinrg of Agly trust -- M. Aglie at less than 120km/h drivinates!!!

Tuesday 16 June 2009

Brakefast!!

MES AMIS, Mjérhiüse he has just break fast haded at his hotel most magnifique in montreal where staying he is. Well, it much better than many of the other hôtels which Maerwose le genie has wiht his presence graced. For one thing, the hôtelier a grate geynius like Mjoreuse is!!


Well, Mjoruse wiht teh food here much impressed is. Normally, Meorwse for brake fast often just bacon and eggs to have has. AND often even that, that he cannot get done porpelly! Well not here mon ami!! NO, mon amis, here Murise had a breakfast most magnifique!!! To start with he ha a cafe au lait and brioche, just to Mjorrrhîse up wake. Then he on to a truffle omlette moved, washed down wiht 1976 Moët et Chandon "Vintage Brut Dom Pérignon Oenothèque Blanc" Champagne, then on to caviar, smoked salmon and oysters wiht MORE of teh champagne. Thne, he had some orange juice to this wash down, then pains au chocolat and pains aux raisins wiht lots of cafe au lait!! LOTS of cafe au lait, to Mjorhese help wake up..


Photo by T. Chu

Then he decided to test M. l'hôtelier to see just how much of a geynius he is. SO, instead of talking to him in ENglish, Mjorise talked to him in ETRUSCAN, a wery obscure language wot not many poeple know. "Bonjour, comment êtes-vous ce matin?" Mjoreése asked. And amazing! M. l'Hôtelier he also Etruscan knew, and much fluent was!! "Très bien, monsieur, et vous?" he asked. Well, Maehryose this was able to answer but then M. l'Hotelier had more to say but alas even le grate geynie Muarose he not as fluent in Etruscan was.

Monday 15 June 2009

MacBook KeyBored Problems SOLVINATED!!!!1!

Mes amis, Mjørhise he was just to M. l'hôtelier explaininating how much many porblems he wiht his AZERTY keybroad having was. And M. l'hôtelier he said "I Can that fix!". Mjuroése, he did not him beleive as a fix had escaped even such a great génie as Mjorowse but still he teh computer him gave.

 
Photo by Sir Stig

M. l'hôtelier he said he could simply change teh keybroad layout. Mjorwse he shocked was. "What, mon ami," he said, "by ripping out teh keyborad and replacing it?" Teh hotelier explained explanitorially that this he did not need to do: He could just in SOFTWARE it change, and then the new kebyoard layout on teh keys write wiht Permanent mraker. He said it simple was -- you just teh System Preferences open. "Woah!" Mjurúse said " HOw does one this do? Does Mjeraese a screewdirver need to use to open some part of teh computer?" "NO!" he said"you just click on teh ikon here on the dock in teh bottom right hand corner of teh screen" but this it tooo complex for Mjorése was so he just smiled and nodded.


Wonce this screen much mysetrious open was, he was able to teh keyboard layout IN SOFTWARE changinate, and then teh new keys write on wiht MARKER! what an idea genius! Also, he for Mjorúwse was able to change teh language to English, when it in Breton already was!!!


Well, Mjoráse he was stariting to think he in the presence of a great geynius was! And then M. l'hôtelier he opened a bottel of whine with a corkscrew wihtout injuring himslef!! Mjurose, he normally impales his hand wiht the corkscrew when he this does (wery painfull, but only a porblem if Mjeéerhuse he WHITE WHINE is trying to openinate, mes amis!!). wOAH! This M. l'Hôtelier, he must a great geynius be, maybe even grate than Mjorose,. Mjírihse he is over awed and humbled.


Photo of corkscrew by Serge Rovenne; Photo of Burgundy bottles by Limegreen

And earlier this evening, Murüse saw teh l'hôtelier raeding Proust in teh ORIGINAL Umbrian!!! WOW!!!

Sunday 14 June 2009

Zondering qround ?ONTRÉQL111

?ES Q?IS ,rhyise he is in q cqfé in ?ontréql qround sitting qnd q coffee enjojying zhen suddenly he re,bered his LOYQL FQNS ,ost loyql1 Qnd then; ,es q,is; he si,ply just HQD to q nnez zobleg post postinqte: Qnd here it is ,es q,is11


Photograph by Tango7174

Qqqqqqqqqqqqqrgh:::::: ?jurozse hqs just noticed ) he is using the AZERTY keyboqrd zonce qgqin1 Oh noes111 He zill try to type porpely from NOW ON, but it much difficult is qnd even such a greyte geynius qs Mjerêse zill mistqkes ,qke:

Hmmmm:::: getting more used to this noz mes amis.

Eh bien, Mjèrése hqs teh hiways qnd biways of Montréql been explorinqting qnd ,uch interesitng he has it found111 Especcialy teh Vieux Montréal, zhere Mhwrzyse enjoyed seeing teh Vieux-Port; teh Château Ramezay Museum qnd wandering round teh Barri Gotic.


Teh view from Mjeréqse his hôtel windoz111

Eh bien; it is true: Mjeérhjyse he thinks he himslef should qn aprrqtment here find1

Friday 12 June 2009

Greetings from MONTREÁL, mon amis!!

As some of my more observant readers might have noted observantly, Mjuwrhîse had in his diary an impromptu unscheduled wisit to Montréal for 9th- the 29th June scheduled. And it is true! He now in Montreal is, after a breif flight on Atterissage Forcé. And it tres bien is!! Murrhøwse he much ovwer joyed is to be spending time in a city so beautiful.

Also, Mjurrowhsé he has been spending time working on his book new. BUT, mes amis, yesterday disaster it STRUCK. Mürjwse he was on his LAPTOP new typing, which he in France purchasinated, when he noticed that teh keys they in the right order were note. They were

< & é " ' ( § è ! ç à ) -
a z e r t y u i o p ^ $ `
q s d f g h j k l m ù
w x c v b n , ; : =


When Mjérhîse, he expecting was

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - =
q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \
a s d f g h j k l ; '
z x c v b n m , . /


This!! It a catatatostrophy was!! BECAUSE teh keys they were not where Mjorwse was them expecting to be, his novel most beauifil instead NONENSENE WAS!!!


Oh noes!! That many hours of work on Hrothgar's Battle: the Norse Gods and the Templar Invention of Cinema -- his book new of scholarship -- wasted has been!!! Oh noes!! WHat to do!?!?! HE to type it all again from scratch all again does not to do want!!!

Apparantly, this, this is NROMAL to have teh keys in this order in computers French. But Mjuruse this does not believe. It is a conspiracy, mes amis! A CONSPIRACY!!!!

Eh bien, for teh meantime Mjorrrowse just much happy to in Móntreal be is. He will about his stay here more you tell soon!! Also he much secrets and discoverys frim his TEMPLAR CASTLE too tell you soon has. THIS SPACE WATCH, mes amsi!!!

Monday 1 June 2009

Arrivinated at Castello di Mjrowse.

Mon ami, Mjrjse he finally at Castello di Mírh¥se is. Even touhgh he wone or two rwong turns made, yet again here in teh true tradition of le monde de mjerîse a map of his journey is:


View Larger Map

Eh bien. Even though it not the SHORTEST POSSIBLE ROUTE was, Muriose he a few nice bottles of Port wine picked up in Porto, Portugul.

And he much glad to at Castello Mjrose be wonce again. He much explorinating of all the secret hidden treasurres here has to do!!!1!