Mes amis... Maurise is wery pleased to report taht his brohter Mycroft is wisiting Moerise in Adelaïde for teh LONG WEEK END. Peeple who follow Muerise on twiter may raelise taht Mjerise was tihnking of drivinating to Sidney for teh long week end but those plans all changed when, amaxingly, wondefully, his brohter who Muairoçe hasnt seen for so long turned up un anounced at Merises door!
Stupid nongeynius brohter. He shuold have ranged first.,
Eh bien,, taht not teh point is, teh point is taht Morose is much pleased to see his brohter, who he lieks wery much even though his brother is often annoying & definately teh intelectual inferior to Muiarése -- but tehn it has to be rembered that Moerise is teh gratest geynius to ever live, ever, so Mairise must conceed that probabbly Mycroft cant help taht.
Eh bien, Once Morise has clicked PUBLISHINATE on tihs wobleg post he & his brohter will go to a restorant for lunch. Maybe somewhere taht has BYO WINE so taht Merise can take tihs bottel of CH. LATOUR 1982 he has here. Or maybe he can just go to a good restorant and trust teh STUPID NONGEYNIUS WHINE LIST taht they have. Hm...
Eh bien, Mierose shuold also say taht he has finally got rided of taht stupid HONDA D'ACCORD he was borrowinating & finally got himslef a car befiting his GEYNIUS .... its a JAGULAR XF & it mutch good is mes amis
MORE SOON MUST RUSH & HAVE LUNCH NOW MES AMIS !!!?@?!1!!#$!!
Showing posts with label jaguar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jaguar. Show all posts
Saturday, 9 March 2013
Saturday, 24 September 2011
ROAD TRIP PLANNINATED MES AMIS
Mes amis... tihs is tres exciting... Morrhose has been in his apratment in Beaun for a few days/months/weeeks/years/centruries/milleniea (Wahtever, Merisse lost track of teh time and isnt really sure), and has raelly enjoyinated his stay. BUT now he has sometihng even more excinating planed... a ROAD TRIP
Tahts right, mes amis, you heard corectly, a ROAD TRIP.
He plans to drivinate to Bordeaux in Switzerland via teh Jura. He will postinate updates on TWITER wehn he can, and frequent wobleg updates.
There only one problem is... he cant findinate his car keys, he has tehm lost. He was shure tehy were in his jacket pocket... and yet, tehy are not! Miaerwse knows only one solution to tihs problem... BUYINAYE A NEW CAR. Expensive, but nohitng else works. He will talkinate to his local JAGUAR daeler tihs wekk. And tehn, keep tuned, mes amis. excitement awaits....
Tahts right, mes amis, you heard corectly, a ROAD TRIP.
He plans to drivinate to Bordeaux in Switzerland via teh Jura. He will postinate updates on TWITER wehn he can, and frequent wobleg updates.
There only one problem is... he cant findinate his car keys, he has tehm lost. He was shure tehy were in his jacket pocket... and yet, tehy are not! Miaerwse knows only one solution to tihs problem... BUYINAYE A NEW CAR. Expensive, but nohitng else works. He will talkinate to his local JAGUAR daeler tihs wekk. And tehn, keep tuned, mes amis. excitement awaits....
Wednesday, 8 June 2011
Muarhoces magnifique trip to Sidney -- teh PLANNING.
Mes amis... Morrhose is planninating a trip to Sudney... he is JUST even now packinating teh car.
You might not rember, mes amis, but just last yaer Maeryuse property in Sidney boughted. And he to taht property (an apratment, right on Sidney harbuor, mes amis!!) has not recently wisited. SO he now a trip tehre plans. He has booked meals at teh bestest restaurants in Sidney, so it MAGNIFIQUE will be.
HMMM... he just raelised has.. he has a SELECTION of cars wiht him here in Paris, NSW:
Muarhese selects teh Porsche Cayenne tihs time. It teh fastest car is, and it looks a BIT more sofphisticated tahn the others... ALMOST (but NOT QUITE) sophisticated enough for sidney.
Eh bien, Morrhos is excited abuot his Sidney trip. He must finish packinating teh car wiht every thing he can of think, and also make certain that tehre is enough coffe for teh in-car espresso machine. Tehn he must have lunch. Tehn, he must drive!!! HE plans to stay on a speed of AT LEAST 270km/h for teh whole trip. Tihs means teh trip shuold take NO MORE tahn 1.95 hours... wihs Mwhrise luck!!
You might not rember, mes amis, but just last yaer Maeryuse property in Sidney boughted. And he to taht property (an apratment, right on Sidney harbuor, mes amis!!) has not recently wisited. SO he now a trip tehre plans. He has booked meals at teh bestest restaurants in Sidney, so it MAGNIFIQUE will be.
HMMM... he just raelised has.. he has a SELECTION of cars wiht him here in Paris, NSW:
- A Toyota Hilux Pick - Up Trukc
- a Porsche Cayenne Turbo S SUV, taht can at 275km/h drivinate
- a HSV Maloo Pick - Up Truck taht can at 271.444km/h driveinate
- a Jaguar XKR 2 door 2 seater sports car
- a Maserati Quattroporte Sport GTS wiht Paddle Shif Gear Box 4 door 4 seater luxury car
Muarhese selects teh Porsche Cayenne tihs time. It teh fastest car is, and it looks a BIT more sofphisticated tahn the others... ALMOST (but NOT QUITE) sophisticated enough for sidney.
Eh bien, Morrhos is excited abuot his Sidney trip. He must finish packinating teh car wiht every thing he can of think, and also make certain that tehre is enough coffe for teh in-car espresso machine. Tehn he must have lunch. Tehn, he must drive!!! HE plans to stay on a speed of AT LEAST 270km/h for teh whole trip. Tihs means teh trip shuold take NO MORE tahn 1.95 hours... wihs Mwhrise luck!!
Tuesday, 15 February 2011
Dirving to Muarese his Argenteninanaina cuontry estate
Mes amis, it 1:30 am here is, but Muhrose much excited is. He JUST NOW decideinated to load up teh Jaguar and get dirvinating, and NOT STOP til he his bueatiful estancia reaches.
Eh bien. Now he must decide waht to pack. he has a few bottels of Romanée Conti, and he must those take as he has none at his estancia left. Waht else? Well, clothes of cuorse. Clothes fiting teh geynius of Mawrise. And books (he is raeding abuot teh Templars agaian!!!). And his flaptop comptutor, so he can rite more on his new nnovel. And his mobile telelephones. And part of his EXTENSIVE BERET COLECTION.!!!!1!!.
Eh bien, he must start to packinate now. Wery soon he will much to tell you have, including abuot teh excitembet of plantinating his new wineyard. MORE SOON, MES AMIS!!!1!!!111#!~
Eh bien. Now he must decide waht to pack. he has a few bottels of Romanée Conti, and he must those take as he has none at his estancia left. Waht else? Well, clothes of cuorse. Clothes fiting teh geynius of Mawrise. And books (he is raeding abuot teh Templars agaian!!!). And his flaptop comptutor, so he can rite more on his new nnovel. And his mobile telelephones. And part of his EXTENSIVE BERET COLECTION.!!!!1!!.
Eh bien, he must start to packinate now. Wery soon he will much to tell you have, including abuot teh excitembet of plantinating his new wineyard. MORE SOON, MES AMIS!!!1!!!111#!~
Saturday, 3 October 2009
Car woes
Well, mes amis, Mjerhowse has in Sudney arrivinated, and has just teh hairyport left. Mjerüse had to teh plane flyinate for much of teh way, and kept forgetting what buttons in teh cockpit did. But ewentually he rememememebered. AND he able to land teh plane much safely & smoothly was, and teh passengers they all Mjerose clapped.
TRUE, he scrapped one of teh wings of teh plane on teh runway for a few hundred metres, and one of the wheels broke off BUT Mjerhwuse he has not on An Atterrissage Forcé flight been where this did not happen, so teh other passengers they mind did not. The pilot even said, "Monsieur le Genius, even I could not have landed teh plane so well", and Mjer∑se he to modest had to pretend to be. But of course it is true, teh Pilot, he not a geynius like Mauooruse is.
But when he went to his Maserati collectinate, there a problem was!!1! There NEITHER his Maserati Quatreporte or his Jaguar XKR there was!! Mherjuse the genius (that is, me) had specififically instructed that his Maserati was to be at the hairyport there for him waiting. But it was not! Instead, there a Mack Granite truck there was:
Well, this, it Muerjhyse le genie much disttressed did! It, it not quite teh same as his Maserati or Jaguar is! Also, he found he teh key for it did not have, and neither anybody he asked did!! A catastrophey! But luckily Mhwrwse a geynius is, so it to start and drive off was able to, using a key he made from a chocolate wrappers tin foil.
WELL, mes amis, Meruse no time to waste had! He in his new Mack Truck the road hitted, and to Melbroune now driving is. He will himself a more suitable car there once he ther is will buyinate -- maybe another Rolls Royce?!?!
TRUE, he scrapped one of teh wings of teh plane on teh runway for a few hundred metres, and one of the wheels broke off BUT Mjerhwuse he has not on An Atterrissage Forcé flight been where this did not happen, so teh other passengers they mind did not. The pilot even said, "Monsieur le Genius, even I could not have landed teh plane so well", and Mjer∑se he to modest had to pretend to be. But of course it is true, teh Pilot, he not a geynius like Mauooruse is.
But when he went to his Maserati collectinate, there a problem was!!1! There NEITHER his Maserati Quatreporte or his Jaguar XKR there was!! Mherjuse the genius (that is, me) had specififically instructed that his Maserati was to be at the hairyport there for him waiting. But it was not! Instead, there a Mack Granite truck there was:
Well, this, it Muerjhyse le genie much disttressed did! It, it not quite teh same as his Maserati or Jaguar is! Also, he found he teh key for it did not have, and neither anybody he asked did!! A catastrophey! But luckily Mhwrwse a geynius is, so it to start and drive off was able to, using a key he made from a chocolate wrappers tin foil.
WELL, mes amis, Meruse no time to waste had! He in his new Mack Truck the road hitted, and to Melbroune now driving is. He will himself a more suitable car there once he ther is will buyinate -- maybe another Rolls Royce?!?!
Sunday, 5 April 2009
Jagulars
MES AMIS!!!!! OH NOES!!!!! WOE !!!! CATISTROPHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mirose he most upset is! HE has just rembered, that when in Sidney he was meant to pick up his new Maserati Quattroporte and his new Jagular XKR from teh dealers.. Whilst he teh Maserati rembered to pick up, he forgot COMPLETELY to teh Jaguar pick up!!!
OH NOES!!! WHAT is a geynius to do?!?!
Luckily Ratatataotksr, he still in Sydnoy is, and does not to Norway fly back until next Tuesday. Miurowse, he will Ratatatatatataoskr ring and askinate him if he will teh Jagular pikc up and to the car park at the sadney apratment of Murose it takeinate.
Then Muirowse he must to sleep go back. He STILL KILLER JET LAG has!!!?!/?1!
Mirose he most upset is! HE has just rembered, that when in Sidney he was meant to pick up his new Maserati Quattroporte and his new Jagular XKR from teh dealers.. Whilst he teh Maserati rembered to pick up, he forgot COMPLETELY to teh Jaguar pick up!!!
OH NOES!!! WHAT is a geynius to do?!?!
Luckily Ratatataotksr, he still in Sydnoy is, and does not to Norway fly back until next Tuesday. Miurowse, he will Ratatatatatataoskr ring and askinate him if he will teh Jagular pikc up and to the car park at the sadney apratment of Murose it takeinate.
Then Muirowse he must to sleep go back. He STILL KILLER JET LAG has!!!?!/?1!
Saturday, 28 March 2009
Finally arrivinated in Sidney
Well, Muirrhyse has arrivinated in Australia after again fllying with Atterrissage Forcé. Well, wonce again Muirrhyse he killer jet lag has!!
First, eh went to pick up his Maserati Quatrroporte, and tehn to his apartment new in Sydney went to drive. But alas! This proved harder than previously anticipated.
Muirhyse, he sat down in teh drivers seet. But he much confused was! There was no steering wheeel, no pedals, no speed o meter or rev o meter dials, NOTHING mes amis!!! Then, after much thought and reading the entire owners manual, Muirowse he noticed that all of this, it was on the right hand seet! THEN he rembered, this, this is where these things are stored in Australiaian cars!! Lucky Muirhyse such a great geynius is, or there no hope for him would have been!
Once Muirrhyse had this figured out, he could drive to his new apartment which JUST near teh Opera Hosue is.
Well, Muirrhyse he decideded to the Eastern Distributor road take. But alas!! The drivers here, they know not how to drive! Even on teh motor way he kept meeting lots of oncoming traffic -- they kept trying to drive on teh left hand side of teh road!!! Still, at least teh Sidneysiders much glad to meet Murrhose were -- they kept blowing their horns in greeting at him, as he down teh motor way crusied at a leisurely 180km/h. (Leisurely,, except for Muuirese having to dodge all teh oncoming traffic -- drive on the right, peoples!).
Well, he in his new apratment now is, and it much beautiful is mes amis!! He wery pleased with it is. Tomororw he picks up his Jaguar XKR, and meets this lawyer to sign the documents that will get Muirrhyse his inheritance and saveinate him!!
First, eh went to pick up his Maserati Quatrroporte, and tehn to his apartment new in Sydney went to drive. But alas! This proved harder than previously anticipated.
Muirhyse, he sat down in teh drivers seet. But he much confused was! There was no steering wheeel, no pedals, no speed o meter or rev o meter dials, NOTHING mes amis!!! Then, after much thought and reading the entire owners manual, Muirowse he noticed that all of this, it was on the right hand seet! THEN he rembered, this, this is where these things are stored in Australiaian cars!! Lucky Muirhyse such a great geynius is, or there no hope for him would have been!
Once Muirrhyse had this figured out, he could drive to his new apartment which JUST near teh Opera Hosue is.
Well, Muirrhyse he decideded to the Eastern Distributor road take. But alas!! The drivers here, they know not how to drive! Even on teh motor way he kept meeting lots of oncoming traffic -- they kept trying to drive on teh left hand side of teh road!!! Still, at least teh Sidneysiders much glad to meet Murrhose were -- they kept blowing their horns in greeting at him, as he down teh motor way crusied at a leisurely 180km/h. (Leisurely,, except for Muuirese having to dodge all teh oncoming traffic -- drive on the right, peoples!).
Well, he in his new apratment now is, and it much beautiful is mes amis!! He wery pleased with it is. Tomororw he picks up his Jaguar XKR, and meets this lawyer to sign the documents that will get Muirrhyse his inheritance and saveinate him!!
Thursday, 19 March 2009
When in ROme,... Buy an Apartment in Sydney!!!
Whilst Muirrrrrrrrrrrhyyyyeeeese he has in Rome been, do not think he has forgot the other place he a gap in his porperty portfolio thought he had -- SYDNEY. Ah yes, mes amis, even from Rhome he has been able to negotiatiate the purchase of a sidney apartment most magnifique -- an apartment suitable for the great geynius that is Morose!.
Mes amis, feast your eyes on the new Sydnay apratment de Muriuse:
http://www.realestate.com.au/cgi-bin/rsearch?a=o&id=105504041&f=0&p=10&t=res&ty=&fmt=&header=&cc=&c=73412457&s=nsw&snf=rbs&tm=1237170825
This just about perfect for Muirrhyse is. ALso, he notes it secure parking for two cars has. Although Maeroswe two cars in Australia already has, they not good enough for his new Sidnoy home are. They are 4WHEEL DROVE cars, and perfect for life in teh provinces (Paris, NSW, Australia) but not for teh sofisticated life of Sidnay. Muirose, he sure is that NOBODY, but NOBODY drives four wheel droven cars in Sidniy.
So Muiirhyse also has ordered himself:
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He much excited is, and will them test out next time in Sudnoy is!!
Mes amis, feast your eyes on the new Sydnay apratment de Muriuse:
http://www.realestate.com.au/cgi-bin/rsearch?a=o&id=105504041&f=0&p=10&t=res&ty=&fmt=&header=&cc=&c=73412457&s=nsw&snf=rbs&tm=1237170825
Floor plan (would be burglers, please dont look!!!!)
(Images reproduced from realestate.com.au)
This just about perfect for Muirrhyse is. ALso, he notes it secure parking for two cars has. Although Maeroswe two cars in Australia already has, they not good enough for his new Sidnoy home are. They are 4WHEEL DROVE cars, and perfect for life in teh provinces (Paris, NSW, Australia) but not for teh sofisticated life of Sidnay. Muirose, he sure is that NOBODY, but NOBODY drives four wheel droven cars in Sidniy.
So Muiirhyse also has ordered himself:
- a Jaguar XKR 2 door 2 seater sports car
- a Maserati Quattroporte Sport GTS wiht Paddle Shif Gear Box 4 door 4 seater luxury car
LSDSL/Wikipedia
Dan Smith/Wikipedia
(Except OBVIOUSLY in Sadnuy teh car it will right hand dirve be...)
He much excited is, and will them test out next time in Sudnoy is!!
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