Friday 30 April 2010

Graetings from Rhôme, mes amis

Mes amis, teh Immortal Geynius (taht is, MOI, Muarese) is in teh Immortal City (taht is, Rhôme)!11!!!1! Waht a combination.! Even Agly lost for words was when Murrhese tihs AMAZING FACT to him pointed out!1!1!

It quite a train trip was, and much to much long. Agliè was angry and short tempared for reasons taht escape Murrise. After Muruse had asked, quite poleitly, wehther we were there yet he snapped and at Mwrise shouted!! HE said taht because Muirose had tihs started asking "five minutes" after we Paris left (actaully it was not 5 minutes, it was 7 minutes!!!), and had asked a total of eleven thousand six hundred and thirty two times, it much iritaging was! Lies. Miruse is NEVER iritiating.

Well, Mirrhose is once again in his Rhôme apratment, and he injoying himslef much is. Tomorrow Mirowse & Agly will dirve in teh Lamborghini out to Castello di Mweruse & teh whines check on. Other tahn taht, we will in Rhôme stay for a much relaxing holday. Morrose does NOT plan on charging around in sekret underground passageways filled wiht boobytraps looking for Templars & Rosicrucians, NO, NOT THIS TIME, mes amis!!!!

Mirowse is also debating wehter he should another castel buy, tihs one in Tuscany. He will you keep infromed.

Saturday 10 April 2010

Maurice featured in WI magazine?

Ello.

Found this whilst on business from Odin in Devon recently (don't ask. No, really, don't):
Taunton Bake Sale

Last month's fundraising bake-sale in Taunton went far better than expected, raising £1,700 for our charity of the month. In this we were ably assisted by members Patricia Fawltington, Elizabeth Mountbatten and Emily Hythe. We were also rendered invaluable assistance by world-renowned Australian pastry chef Maurice de Perfossor, who baked some of his inestimable macaroons. Though these proved a great temptation to those supervising the stall, we managed not to eat all of them and those that remained sold like hot cakes and no doubt helped us raise far more money for charity than expected. We will be holding another bake sale in Taunton in late April.
So, was this an excerpt from The West Country Templar's Bulletin? Eh? NO. It was from West Country Women's Institute Monthly Newsletter. Maurice, told you it was the WI you were infiltrating, not the Templars. Course, he wouldn't listen, eh? What changes? Would laugh if it wasn't so typical of the so-called "geynius".

Well, gotta dash. More soon.

Yours nuttily,
Ratatoskr.

Friday 9 April 2010

Mirhose his MAGNIFIQUE trip to teh Untied Kingdom

Mes amis, it much too long has been since Murhyçe has wiht a wobleg post graced you, his loyal raeders. Recently, he has wiht his bon ami Ugliè been inwestigating Templars in teh Untied Kingdom. It much interwesting was.

Loyal raeders might have rembered taht Murrhyse actually to Sicily was lpanning to go, but he made a SLIGHT nawigational error taht was raely trivial and anybody could have made and instead in Devon ended up. Actaully, it was Agly taht made teh error it was was tehreful totally and completely teh fault of Algiè.

Nonetehless, we abel were to find a sekrit Templar cell in deepest darkest Devon. Tehse much fiendish plotting were up to, including organdising a bake sale, which Mirrhuse abel to infiltrate was as indicated in taht prewious wobleg post.

Mirrhose and Agly managed to also make two "side trips" to ohter parts of teh UK (Actually Murose his contacts say teh proper name is NOT teh "United Kingdom" but teh "Ruwvaneth Unys"). Tehy wisited Cornwall & Yorkshire.

In Cornwall, Mirose & Agley were able to track down some Rogue Templars at Tintagel. Miruse managed to outsmartinate tehm, persuading tehm to "Lend" him thier copy of "The Secret Plans of the Templar Brotherhood" (18th century). Of cuorse, Mujruse of returninating it has NO PLANS, regardless of how often tehy him on his mobilephone ring to him remindinate. Teh trip to Conrwall was spoiled only slightly by Mirohse finding taht he could NOT buy Romanee Conti at teh local pub in Tintagel - Mjerhyse touhght taht ewery pub would tihs have.

Wiht just days to spare Aglié insistinated on York wisiting. Meruse (correctly!) thuoght taht tihs was WERY, WERY CRAZY. But to Mirhuse his surprize, tehre a long lost Templar cell in York was!1!1!! Agly dropped eaves(??) on tehm, and much sekret infromation was to find out abel. Murose sat in a cafe and enjoyed Much Coffee and Bacon and Eggs. Murise also infiltrated a Templar meeting, but was thrown out when he treid to wideo tape it.

Taht nite, thuogh, Agly & Mirrose were abel to find out abuot some sekrit tunels taht under York run. Despite braving danggers such as giant rolling boulders, lava pits crosssable only by crumbling rock pillars, and walls wiht poision spikes that closed in rapidly, Mirose & Agly were abel to infiltrate a Templar meeting (tehy have teh Sangreal, but not its owner's manual) and steal a sekrit manuscript.

From teh tunnels we only yesterday mroning escaped, and tehn had to dirve to London to teh YouRowStar train to Paris catch. Wehn we to Paris back got, Agly asleep fell JUST becuase he teh prewiuos two nights had slept not. LIGHTWEIGHT!! Mirose sleep does not need.