Muarises' capture by teh FEINDISH rosicriciuans

MES AMIS ..... teh past few months ahve been WERY adwenturous for Mjerise. In Septembre, he wisited Nürëmböürg & tehre found mutch sekrit Templar evidence, especially in teh ccatecombes hidden under teh city. ALAS he actually got lost & it took him many daeys to find his way= out but Moarise is a geynius & so fir him nothing is implossible so ewentually he it managed . (by following teh GREEN EXIT SIGNS whod ahve guessed tehy led to teh exit? A foolish miscualculation by teh templars!) .

Unfrotunately on his whey back to PARRHIS he was accosted by a group of thugs in chainmail he know nows were teh ROSICRUSCIANS! Clearly tehy were unaware of Muares's arangement wiht the Templars, & were aiming to Stop Him From Doing His Waluable Work!

Muarrise was bundled into teh back of a large black Mercedes=Benz S65 AMG (Muerise is pleased taht his abductors ahd such an impressive car --- he will ahve to get one himslef now!!?!2!??). After a few houres driving (wiht Merise bundled into teh back wiht a sack over his head === NOT FITING TRAETMENT FOR A GEYNIUS ==== he tried to complain & said taht he would promise to forget where tehy were but he was ignorinated) .

Ewentually we arrived at a partly ruined castel somewhere in teh countryisde. Merise was roughly shoved into his cell. LUCKILY tehy forgot to remove Mierrise""s possesisons so he still had his phone, laptop, & all teh TEMPLAr manuscripts he seized. After a few days fiddling , he managed to get teh camerera on his cellular phone IPHONE phone to work & snap tihs photo:

MUERISES CELL

A PHOTO

BY MORRROSE

EH BIEN. IT quite rough & uncomfortable is , & not fiting of a geynius. Luckily Merrose found a matresses & blankets hidden away ...also a desk & chair ... so he work on his GRANDE work was abel to do,.

After a few weeks of tihs DEPREVWATUION (only four meals a day .... mostly game, wiht perfectly aged 1st growth Bordeaux, and a tasteful selection of cheeses & a glass of armagnac to follow ... and a banquet evwery other week) Mueerrise could bear it no more & so escaped in late nowember. He tehn boughted himslef an impressive OLD VW BEETEL whitch had had a VW PORSCHE ENGINE into it put for taht bit of unexpected acceleration if he had to from teh ROSICRUCISNANS ONCE MORE ESCAPINATE. But luckily his trip back to PARRIS  from Königsbrunn (where in captivity was) was unewentful, and only took about a month.

MERRISE IS A GEYNIUS NAWIGATIOR SO YOU SHOULD ALL

TAKE NOTE OF HIS ROUTE FROM KONNÏGSBRUN TO PARRRESE

AND COPY ITS AMAZING NAWIGATIONAL ABILITYS

IT CLEARLY TEH SHORTREST MOST EFFISHENT ROUTE IS>

When Merrise arrived in Parrrise teh many cityzens had been mising him for too long & teh excitement for his return had reached fever pitcgh!!! Tehre ment to be a GRAND WELCOMING HOME PRECESSION was but unfrotunately it had to be cancelled at teh last minute due to ....... sunspots ..... yes, tahts right ..... due to sunspot actiwity. (sounds conwincing>????). so Muarrroçe snuck in INCOGNITO.

BUT AT LEAST HE"S BACK IN PARRIS

House hunting.

House hunting has proved to be far more tricky than previously anticipated.

To put it boldly, there are no large 19th century grand homesteads going wanting in the Armidale vicinity. This is most peculiar. It is most annoying.

Of course, I quickly figured that there was only one potential solution: travel back in time to 1829, build a homestead, get tenants to mind it for the next 184 years, and then travel back to the present day and claim my mansion.

Of course, even this wasn't as simple as it should be. The first few places I built were demolished in the '70s, or burnt down, or just fell down. (Drat.)

This might lead to some ... interesting ... insurance claims for me over the next few months, but anyway.

The important point is that I now have always owned a 19th century homestead just outside of Armidale. I'll move back in next week.

Till then ... Adios!

From the desk of Mycroft de Perfossor AC.

HI FOLKS.

Not Maurice here. It's Mycroft.

I write this on the road. That's right, folks, I'm leaving Canberra and heading back to Armidale. I have an arrangement with the university there (l'Université de la Nouvelle-Angleterre) that I can teach part time, and spend the rest of the time in France where I have managed to let Maurice give me the use of his Pauillac chateau. Hehehe.

Well, I guess it was inevitable with the change in Government that there'd be changes at the Department of the Prime Minister and Cabinet, and it just so happened that I was one of them. However, my departure was not at all forced, and entirely apolitical. (I am always entirely apolitical). I came to an understanding with the new PM, with whom I get along marvelously. I have every faith in his ability to do the job just as well as I imagined he would.

The arrangement allowed me to retire on my own terms, rather than being given "the shove". In return, I agreed to refrain from stapling the PM's tie to his desk. A classic win-win scenario. I do now have every paperclip that used to belong to the department in my possession at this stage, though.

Anyway, the house is being packed -- I loaded a few essentials into the Jag -- and will be house hunting when I get to Armidale. I'm looking for something just out of town. Modest -- no more than ten bedrooms, and eleven acres of grounds. I'd like a cellar. I'd prefer an older house -- is something 19th century too much to ask for? Maybe something Arts & Crafts? We'll see.

Eh, I have a long way to go. I want to get to Armidale this evening, and I'm still in Muswellbrook, so I should go.

Oh yes, Maurice. Haven't heard from him lately, eh? I'm almost starting to worry. I tried to call him a few days ago (normally I'd do anything to avoid talking to him on the 'phone) and no answer. Where could he be? I guess that, despite his agreement with the Templars, he must have had a run in with some other secret society. Bound to happen, eventually. I'd do something, but ... eh ... I'm retired now, folks.

Best finish this coffee, put some more diesel in the Jag, and head off...

Nürëmbërg

MES AMIS Murhuse is in Nürëmbërg at an un-disclosed location (Bergstraße 5, 90403 Nürnberg, Deutschland) to inwestigatinate teh Templars & Rosicrucians tehre. TAHT"S RIGHT MES AMIS .... tehre's templars in Nürëmbërg. Nürëmbërg is teh last place taht Moariçe would ahve expected templars or sekrit societies but Àglei sed taht tehy were here, and ... eh bien ... it was so.(NONETHELESS MORROSE IS STILL THE GRATER GEYNIUS).

Muarrose has been in Nürëmbërg since he left Quebec for Berlin (28/th./AUGUST), & teh drove to Nürëmbërg (unbelievably teh B.M.W.Corporation didn"t recognised teh grate geynius of Muarrose & wouldnt give him a free B.M.W.autocar! He had to break into teh factory at midnigght to get a free B.M.W.autocar, even though its his due as a grate geynius!!1!!?!????1???@)

Eh bien. Maeryse has founded out taht Nürëmbërg it has many sekrit underground tunnels * & he has tehm been inwestigatinating ... throught teh many sekrit passageways , & cellars & sekrit Templar & Rosicrucian complexes under teh ground. Teh TEMPLARS even ahve a sekrit canteen in teihr sekrit undergound base .... complete wiht dinner ladies & trays & a buffet salad bar. Mwerrose ahs had lunch tehre many thymes. Teh bratwurst is quite good.

Eh bien, taht not teh point is. Teh point is taht Mearose has once again spent thyme hiding in sekrit Templar bored-rooms whilst sekrit Templar meeting s take places & has evwen recorded tehm (one of teh Templar conspirators helpfully showed Muorrose how to record a wideo on his IPHONE 5S). He has spent hours rummaging throught teh libraries & looking behind teh sofa in teh staffroom (tihs is wehre you find all teh good stuff mes amis ....... not just anceint sekrit documents BUT ALSO several humbugs, a hankercheif, and €11,50 in small change!!!!!!1!).

Moarise is mutch excitinated wiht teh work he is doingk here .... but he is only staying here another few days. Teh week aftrer next he must go to Frnance to meet up wiht Agléy. He will post more infromation HERE> so dont froget to KEEP RAEADING MES AMIS>.

Muerises drive to CANADA

Muariose is an EXPERT NAWIGATOR so he thoughted taht peoples might enjoy & learn from teh wery clever & efficient route he worked out from NEW YORK CITY to QUEBEC CITY:

Templars in New York City, New Yorke State *(USA).

Mes amis .... Merise is back & inwestigatinating Templar conspiracies! He"d hate to disapoint tehm after all, tehy were so keen for him to resume. In fact, tehy have been leaving helpful incrimiating clues all over teh place recently just to ensure taht Maorise doesn"t miss anything & doesn"t bored get. HOW CONSIDERATE.

Anyway, evwen though his associate & fellow inwestigator Agley is currently on holiday in Antigua, Mearowse carries on wiht his inwestigations. Recently his inwestigations lead him from Buenose Aires to Snan Fran Cisco to New Yoerk city. Tahts right mes amis -- teh New York City in teh Untied SStats of Amrica! (Not teh one in Belgium).

Merwçe managed to find out taht teh Templars ahve a sekrit hideaway rite under teh city, rite under Grand Central Station in fact! Muorose found teh Entrance to tehse Dread Caverns & teihr inner dark sekrits explorinated!!!!

Muerise OF COARSE had his iPHONE & teh batery wasnt dead & he has recently figured out how to use teh camera on this marwellous dewice (ITS FIENDISGHLY DIFFICULT BUT LUCKILY MEROISE IS A GEYNIUS SO HE IT WORKED OUT EWENTUALLY).

Meurise stumbles across a procession of Templars 

& manages to take an iPHONE pic before hiding 

An antichamber in teh catecombes. 

Muerwose of course has much more photos than just these but of cuorse he cant them all share here. He also managed to stumble across teihr sekrit Templar library (fiendishly hidden behind a sign saying "LIBRARY") which Mueriose managed to find even though it wery sekrit & hidden is by following teh signs marked "LIBRARY TIHS WAY".

Meurise quickly raced trhough teh library before he was detected & managed to find some wery waluable & sekrit Templar volumes which explain teihr organisation & its evil plans in much detail,. Meurise tried to smuggle tehm out of teh library but a librarian told him off & made him get a library card & take them out "liek a normal library user"(!!?!!@1!!)/ Muaerise was of course much nervous as he was worried taht teh Templars would race in & find Moaerrioce but luckily teh didnt.

Ladden down wiht such rare Manuscripts, Mearuise tehn made his way towards teh Grand Central Hall & found a crack in teh wall through witch he was abel to observinate most of a sekrit Templar ceremony before he had to leave becuaese Moerise his stoumach was starting to Grumble & also he a reserwation at teh {"PER SE": restorant .

Merise at this restorant enjoyinated a magnifique 8 course meal wiht many bottels of whine &* tehn he decided he should write an account of his adwenture so he brushed all teh leftover plates & glasses & cuttelry & candlesticks onto teh ground, whipped out his MACBOOK & started typinating.

OH NOES TEH MAIRTRE D'HOTEL IS SHOUTING AT MERISE & WORNGLY CLAIMING HE SHOULDNT HAVE BRUSHED EVERYTIHNG OFF ONTO TEH FLOOR. Stupid nongeynius Maitre-'d-hotel. Moarise is a geynius & thus can do wahtever he wants.

Eh bien. Moerise knew he was sitting on sutch explosively exciting Material taht he should leave new york city before he it published. SO, pursued by teh Maitre'd'hotel, teh chef, teh sommelier and several waiters, Merrise made rapidly for the door & headed to his hotel, not even stopping to pay teh bill. He then proceeded to a car daelership & boughted a DODGE CHALENGER with (6.4 L) V8 engine & 6 speed manuel gearbox -- FAST ENOUGH TO OUTPACE EVWEN TEH MOST DETERMINED TEMPLAR. Luckily Merise managed to awoid paying for tihs too,.

Teh he drovinated to Quêbec City, Canada, not dropping in speed below 120 mph teh whole way. Witch currently is presently where he now is right now at teh moment./

Teh fine whines of BODEGA DE MUARISE

Mes amis ... Muarise has been planninating a wobleg post for teh past few weeks but alas he has been wery BUSY. Unfrotunately teh TEMPLAR CONSPIRACY INWESTIGATION has kept him wery busy, though inwestigating it is much exciting. And teh Templars are now kindly more thoughtful about leaving lots of interwesting & incriminating clues for Muorise to find, witch is thoughtful of tehm. Mjerise is currently in San Fran Cisco, chasing down some leeds here. But about taht more he cannot say YET, as it still sekrit is.

Eh , bien , taht not teh point is. The point is taht whilst he was in Argentinaniananina Morose got to try teh first (1er) of teh Argentineian wintage of BODEGA MUARISE. Merose wants to you about it here tell.

SO, TEH WHINES, + prices, + release dates:

2013 Bodega de Morrise "Le Grand Genie" Blanc. 60% Sémillon, 25% Sauvignon blanc, 5% chardonneigh. A fine whine inspirinated by teh grate white whines of Boredeaux, but with 5% chardoney added (either for complexiexity, or because teh whinemaker contracted a brain disease,. Mourise is not shure witch). 728.8% new oak. Released: 01/01/2014. €125.00/bottel
2013 Bodega de Mueraese Chardonneigh Reserve. A fine chardonnay inspired by teh gratest white whiens of Burgundy, witch are some of Merroses' favorites. Muerise insisted on 30,000% new oak, which teh winemaker said was impiossible. But Muarise proved tehm wrong again! Released: 01/01/2014. €65/bottel.
2013 Bodega de Mjeorwse Chardonay de Templar. An everyday drinking chardonay tahts perfect to drink whilst dreaming up diabolical plots for world domination. 36.77777891% new oak. Released: 01/09/2013. €25/bottel
2013 Bodega de Muarise Torrontés.Tihs grape is popular in Argentina & teh estate manager leiks it. Released: 01/09/2013/ €25/ bottele

2013 Bodega de Muriese "Le Grand Genie" Rouge. 50% Cabernet sauvignone, 25% Merlot, 20% Cabernet Franc, 15% Petit Verdot, 10% Malbec. A fine red whine inspired by teh grate red whines of Boredeaux, which Merise adores. Inspired by teh grate geynius of Meoorose. 15,000% new oak. Released: 01/01/2015. €150/bottle.
2013 Bodega de Morruse Pinot Noir Reserve. A fine Pinot Noir inspried by teh grate red whines of Burgundy, whitch Merise also adorinates. 800% new oak. Released: 01/01/2015. €75 / bottel
2013 Bodega de Mueroce Pinot Noir de Templar. An "every day " pinto noir, taht is perfect for drinking whilst dreaming up evil plots for world domination. 25.444% new oak.Released: 01/01/2014. €30 / bottel.
2013 Bodega de Muarise Malbec. A lovely whine inspired by ... uh ... Merise cant rember. ANYWAY TAHTS NOT TEH POINT. teh point is its good. Released: 01/01/2014. € 30 / bottle.

GET YOUR ORDERS IN NOW! JUST clickinate here -->       <--- to order, or ring Meries'es Argentinina estate on wahtever teh phone number tehre is.

Muerise would stay & rite more but he is being persued by a crazed Templar monk . Tihis is not good. Agley is nerwous & keeps telling Moerise to "Hurry UP" as if his geynius wobleg posts could be hurried up. OOOPS teh monk is breaking teh door down now, must run away. Diabolical schemes to uncoverinate, mes amis!!!!!!