Tuesday, 30 December 2008

High Luxury Car. Missing Tickets of the HAIRYPLANE.

Mes amis, here a photo of Muarose his TOYOTA HILUX outside his hosue in Paris Australia  is:

And here one of Marrowse down the main street of Paris Australia in his Porsche Cayenne Turbo S SUV drivinating is:

Well, that's all the fun that Muarose he time for at the moment has. He seems to have his hairyplane tockets for his plain trip to France lost again.

He on the 2nd January back to France was planinng to flyinate, but now without his ticket this he cannot do! He must new tickets buy!! Mirrohße he most upset and agitated is. He certain he on the table by the stairs put them down only yesterday, and maybe he certain is that he there only this morning sore them, but then that now MUIRRRRHISE the full force of his geynius on this matter puts he also thinks that maybe he in his desk draw put it but allas it in neither place is though Mioruse in the desk in his litle gazebo summer house has not yet looked and maybe it in their is or maybe Mioruse in the glove box of his Porsche has it left or maybe he accidentally on it as if it scrap paper were wrote and then it away threw but alas Mirise he no longer certian is and now he much agitated is and he still cannot it find aargh maybe if he rang Ratatoskr or Aglie that they might that maybe they might know what Muairose should do but alas Muirose much agitated is and did he mention that he on the table by the stairs has checked and he certain that it there was and it not is???

Sunday, 28 December 2008

Noël à Paris, de l'Australie

Mes amis, Muarise in Paris Australia for Christmas being is much enjoying it. In Armidale France the weather it is 4C, in Paris Australia the wether it is 24C. Murrise is glad about those extra 20 degrees celciuc mes amis!

Still, today Muirrhyçe for a drive in his HILUX went. He was around the highways and bighways (er, or is that hyways and byways spelt?????? MUAIROßE he CANNOT rember!!!) of Paris Austrtalia for a drive went. Well, he much pleased to see how the citizens of this pleasant and beautiful city most pleasant and beautiful have their most famous & favoured resident commemememememeemememeorararatedded!!!! Look, mes amis!! Vous devez voir ça!!

Eh bien, mes amis, is it not a sight for sore eyes is?? It is true, it most beautiful is!!!

Hmm..... talking of driving mes amis, Mirrose he cannot rememeber --- is it in Australia that you are meant on the left or the right of the road meant to drivinate? Muiorose knows that in FRANCE one must on teh left of teh road drivinate, but in AUSTRALIA, well mes amis now he cannot any more remember. Maybe it the right is that on which you meant to drive are. Still, these trivial details most trivilal do not a geynius like Muairose concern!!! HE rises above all of them!

Wednesday, 24 December 2008

Joyeux Noël!!

Joyeux Noël!!!

Well, its worked out that Miroise he in Austrillia for Christmas (or 'Noël' - en francais 'Weihnachten'). Well, mes amis, Miurase had not this expected, but maybe he should this would have happened had guessed it would when he on the 21st December to Australia flew out knowing full well that Miuwrowse the genius he would have to must for at least six days have to in Australlia stay and before then to France would not able to get back be able to before that date which after 25th decembre it would have been.

Well, in any case the greatest geynius to walk teh face of this earth (i.e. ME, Maurise de Perfossor) wishes his devoted raeders most devoted a happy christmas and a joyful new year - or, en francais "Bon Nadal i Feliç Nova Prop dedicat lectors"!!!

Sunday, 21 December 2008

Maurice must to Australai return....

MES AMIS!!! Muarice, he has to Austrailai urgently been called back urgently! He must there go NOW mes amis!!! He has on the next flight with Atterrissage Forcé booked himself. Again, he will be flying Atterrissage Forcé Ultra-Premium Executive First Class. The LUXURY, mes amis, it you would not beleive!

Eh bien, Muarhijçe he must now go. He will his Dodge Monaco to the hairport drive, and then the hairyplane to Austrillia catch. Once in Brisbane or Sydney or wherever it is to which Muirise flies, he will his Porsche Cayenne Turbo S SUV pick up, and to Paris Australia drivinate. Then he can turn off the light he in his house in Paris Australia left on, and then Mirise le genie can to Armidale France once again head back.

Eh bien, mes amis, you can see how dedicated to energy saving Mior®oßê is!!! He is ALL THAT WAY willing to fly just to a light switch off!

He will keep you updated with how this odyssey most exciting unfolds!!! KEep reading, readers most loyal!!! And you can bask in the genius of Maurice de Perfossor, genius! OR en francais: Mauricea jours de la Perfossor invités, un brillant nager dans la boîte (hmmm... GOogle Translate claims this translates as "Maurice Perfossor days of the guests, a brilliant swim in the box" -- GOOGLE!!! YOU MUCH WORK ON YOUR TRANSLATOR HAVE TO DO!!!)

Monday, 15 December 2008

Roman Treasure found in Northern France

From the Norwegian newspaper Den Ekorn Avis:

Roman Treasure found in Northern France

Luck doesn't come much better than it does for M. Caméléon de Madagascar. Whilst walking in the woods near his home in Pas-de-Calais, he spotted a Roman treasure hoard which archaeologists are already describing as "the find of the decade". Le Musee du Louvre has offered an undisclosed sum to M. de Madagascar for the find.

Well, Maurice, looks like this time it was 'the real thing', eh? Not some trick played on you by that reptilian friend of yours. Only trick he played was to actually collect the treasure that you couldn't be bothered to even look at properly.

Maurice 0, Chameleon 8.

Yours squrrelishly,


Friday, 12 December 2008

This geynius is not fooled this time,, mes amis!!

Well, mes amis, Muirhose he was in the woods near his home in Armidale, France once again for a walk going. Well, when he was along the path through the woods walking he over something tripped! THis , it was most undignified for a geynius such as Miaeröçe!!! Well, when he went back to shout at whatever it was that tripped up the geynius Miroise, he found it was a buried Roman treasure!

FOr a moment, Miaeurowse he overjoyed was. Roman treasure! THis, it would more muney for Muirowse be. But then Maurose he rememebered. That chameleon in the area is! It must be him, mes amis, trying to your hero must magnifique trick again. Oh no, you cannot Murrhise the geynius the same way fool twice!

Eh bien, Muirise the geynius he took no further notice of this chameleleon most fiendish, he had it fooled! HE just on his way walked, not looking back at all!!!

MAIURHYSE 1, CHAMELEOEN 7. SO FAR, mes amis. WATCH THIS SPACE. Maurice le génie triomphe! Él no puede ser golpeado, mes amis, no siempre!!! No, en absoluto!!!!

Friday, 5 December 2008

Bad premonitions

Mes amis, a terrible thing it has happened just as Maerowse he for a drive about to go was! Just now, mes amis, Muirowse out to where he his cars keeps parked went. First Muirohse he had to decide which car to drivinate -- eventually he decided on teh Bugatti. Just as Mhaerwse he was teh car unlocking, he a sniggering from with the shrubbery heard!!! Miurose, he was gobsmacked. He, it could not believe! It must be that feindish chameleon! it must, mes amis!!!

Miorose, he straight back inside went. This too bad is, really. Just when things so well they were going. He does not know what will next happen -- but Miuarwise he does know that that chameleon it always trouble is. And moiuraêçe he never rwong is.

Friday, 28 November 2008

The berets of MEARUSE!

Mes amis, if you cannot to LONDON make it to the exhibition of Mauriose his berets look at, fear not! The V&A Museum, they plans have to the exhibition tour!

Eh bien, first it to Paris France will be going, then Armidale France, then to Berlin Germany.

After that it will through the USA (New York, San Francisco, Seattle, Deaver), then Australia (Melbourne, Sydney, Perth, Paris, Brisbane, Wagga Wagga, Davenport) toouring!.

Mes amis, with it to all these MAJOR WROLD COSMOPOLITAN CENTRES going you cannot possibly miss out!

Wednesday, 26 November 2008

The Triumphe of MAURICE!!

Mes amis, your genius favorite Mearise de Parfessor is triumphing once again! Yes my freind things they are finally going well for our hero Mirise di Pirfissir! (that being me!)

The exhibition of Muarice his beret collection at the V&A MUsueum to a good start got off. There were at least 10 people at the opening, including rihc & famuous people. Muarise he estimates that at least 2 of these people actually meant to be there, and were not there just because they a wrong turning had made and now the way out could not again find.

And that, it is not all mes amis!!

Eh bien, also, Muirose his course "HIS987 The Norse Gods and Oral Hygiene: A study of Dental Wash and Dental Floss Usage Before AD 1100" at thte Université du Délire Iguane is well going. Muirise has severall students who on this corse enrolled, and he teaching them and sharing with them his wit and wisdom much enjoying is!

Also he at his old ALMA MATER, Université de la Nouvelle-Angleterre, is enjoying working much! It near his hosue in ARMIDALE FRANCE is so it convienient for Maerose is!!

Sunday, 2 November 2008

Berets through the ages

MES AMIS!!! Muirouse much delighted to announce is that the Victoria & Albert Mueseum in London, SOuth Kensington, UK is to put on an exhibition centred around Miurose his Beret collection!!!! It "Berets through the ages: The collection of Prof. Mauirce de Perfossor" will be called!!!!!!!

Mes amis, the exhibition it next week opens, but for more details you can to the website of teh V&&A go: http://www.vam.ac.uk/exhibitions/mauricesberets!!!!!! SEE YOU THERE, MES AMIS!!!!!1!

Friday, 31 October 2008

Visiting mon ami Aglie

Mes amis, last night Murise his good freind Agliè once again visitinated. Well, he much glad again to see his good freind was. And this time Aglie, he was with Maerowse happy as this time Murowse the Calvados brought!!!

Well, we of many things talked. Oddly, Aglie he was wery keen to about this secret map of the Templar castle which Murrise he had lied and said he had much keen to about find out. Muirose claimed that it maybe had been losted when Muaeroçe his house was burgalinated.

Oddly, Aglie he did not with this explanation happy seem. He did not Muirose the genius believe! Just because Maurose lying is, is no reason not to believe him! He a geynius is, after all!!! Mon ami Aglie, he started to say "But the map, it was not there when I broke in t--", and then Aglie, he stopped. Murise wonders what Aglie was going to say, and why he continue did not. Most odd, mes amis, most odd.

Eh bien, Muirowwse has a greayte surprise for his raeders most loyal soon, and will them of it tell soon. Keep reading , mes amis!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, 26 October 2008

Back again in Armidale France!!!

Wow! Muarise he is back again in his hosue & Home. This time WITH his toothbrush electric. It most invaluable was!! It helped him from vampires escape, and he even was able to it use to fix the car when Muraises car its engine did not want to work! AND he can with it his teeth brush!

Well, he is looking forward to seeing Aglie in a few days time. Muirose and Aglie, they much exciting things will ahve to discuss!!! Muarose will the Calvados bring.

But first, he must a map of his joruney his raeders most loyal show:

Agrandir le plan

WoWW! THat was not the shortest route, as Muarose he was hoping it would be!!! Next time, he will have to not the road signs ignore. And MAYBE he should a GPS himself buy!!!

Friday, 24 October 2008

In Norway again (realy, mes amis!!)

Well, now Muarise realy now in Norway is. He saw Ratatoskr when he stopped for coffee in Oslo did. Strange, Ratatoskr did not seem to Muirise see, and left rapidly.

Still, it too cold is. Murarse must get back home to Armidale France soon!!

In Norway again

Mes amis, Murrhyse he is in the North of Norway again. Mes amis, it's like deja vu all over agaiN! Still, at least this time he not stranded is. THIS time, Muirose he the Bugatti has with him! So he cannot stranded get.

And, erm, Muarose he has just noticed he in the nroth of SWEDEN is, not NORWAY. Hmm. That explains why people here Norweigan do not speak. Too cold for Muarowse now. He must to France get back. He did not even here mean to come, he does not know how he came to be here. Maybe he another rwong turning made. Maybe he in Latvia should have turned right.

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

Don't go near the castle, mes amis!!!!!!

Aargh. Murhyse, he WERY much awake now. He out of the castle got WERY quickly. Don't ask, please, mes amis. There were teeth, just as he was to sleep getting. Sharp teeth. For some raison the kind gentleman in the cape wanted Muirhyses neck to bight. Lucky Marise distracted him by hitting him on the head repeatadly with Murrhyse his electric toothbrush. Then Muarowse a quick getaway was able to make.

Well, he in Poland now happy is to be. He has been much glad his car it can drive so fast!!!!

Tuesday, 21 October 2008

So Tired. Must Stop Driving. Murrhyse He Must Sleep.

Well, Murrhyse in Roumania is now. It's dark, and stormy with only brief flashes of lightening to the road illuminate ahead of Maurice. With the rain this heavy, mes amis, Maurowse he must for the night find somewhere to stay!

Hmm... that dread forbidding castle looks welcoming. THere a handpainted sign saying "Visitors always Welcome" is.

Hungry in Hungary!!

Mes amis! Murhuse somehow in hungary has ended up. Hmm... maybe he a rwong turning somewhere back in Italia made. Hopefully he will figure out where he is maen to be going soon.

First, he must for food stop. He much hungry is!!!

Sunday, 19 October 2008

Retreiving the toothbrush, mes amis!!

WELL, mes amis, Murrhyse in valencia once again is mes amis. AND what a traumatic day most traumatic Mierose he had!

Firstly, he to the hotel where Muarise the genius he had stayede. And alas! They had his room cleaned out, and they they said that if a toothbrush had there been then it probably thrown out was had been!!

Murrise he was livid. He never his temper loses, he always the model of calm & Compusure is. Still, he for something to throw at the receptionist looked. He pulled something out of his bag and it at the receptetionist threw. Sacre bleu! It Murhyse his electric toothbrush was! It it in his bag all along was! Murrhyse he overjoyed was!! Alas, he had the receptionist knocked out, so he hhad to his toothbrush retrieve and a retreat most rapid make.

Lucky his car new much fast is, he got in and to Valencia much fast drove! Tomoororw he the ferry to italy must get. Wish him luck mes amis!!

Saturday, 18 October 2008

Home again. Maybe, ??

Well, Maerse he back from his drive is now. Er. he a little lost got, maybe just a little. Still, it a wery fun drive was. Mairwse he the lada took, and most disappointed he was that it not as good as Murrhyse his Bugatti Veyron was.

AS is the tradition most magnifique, here the map de Mauriceses journey is:

Agrandir le plan

Well, Maurise back to be in his house & Home much happy is. ALso, he needs to get started on his job new.

OH NO! Quelle catastrophe!! Mes amis! Muarhsyse he has just noticed! He lost his toothbrush!

Now, he convinced is that he in the hotel in lisboa left it. Now Murwse must again to Portugal go to reclaim his toothbrush! He not a moment to loose has! He must this post and then to the Mauricemobile rush!!!!

This time he will the Bugatti take though mes amis...

Monday, 13 October 2008

La voitures de Maurice!

Well, mes amis, it only now Mwr®hyçe back to Armidale France has got, that he realises how many cars he now has!!

He has:

Well, mes amis, with all thes cars at Mwrise his disposal, Maroose thinks he for a drive should go! But which car should he take!?!?! Maybe his Bugatti Veyron, or maybe his Lada 1500??!? Muwarhyçe, he cannot decide!!

Sunday, 12 October 2008

Back in Armidale, France

Wow! Miurise had quiet a trip!

Agrandir le plan

Okay, Mwuries he admits that with retrospect he did not the most direct route take, even though he very hard tried to do so. FOr example, Muwriçe he drove the rwong direction when he Paris left. Eh bien! Il s'agissait d'une simple erreur! Anyone it could have made! Even such a great geynius as Muwrse.

At least in his new Bugatti, the trip did not long take. Eveyrthing is quick when you drive at 300km/hour, mes amis!!

Now, he in Amridale fRance safely home is, he much happy is. Also, after such a long drive he much happy is. He will post again later today with MORE detials, MES AMIS!!

Saturday, 11 October 2008

BLOGGING AT 400km/hour!!!

MES AMIS! THis nouvelle voiture de Maurice can certainly go fast!! Like 407.5 km/hour!!!

Actually, that is Muarhwses little joke. Mostly he at 300km/hour is travelling. 407.5km/hour the fuel it too quickly uses up.

Wow, the countryside does kind of fade past WERY fast. ALso, Muarhyse he keeps seeing blue flashing lights in his rear vision mirror. He not certain what they could be is. Maybe his eyes he needs to get tested. Still, they all seem to disappear quickly enougjh.

Soon be in Armidale France mes amis! But maybe Mwrwçe for now should his eyes on the road keep!!!

La nouvelle voiture de M. Maurice!

Mes amis, votre bon ami Murrhî∫e has another new car himself bought. Oui, il est vrai! He now a brand new Bugatti Veyron has. He with this car new much pleased is!

Well, mes amis, Mwariçe must the road hit now and to Armidale France drive. He to get there cannot wait. He has a new job to look forward to, and he also knows his bon ami Agliè in Armidale France is also at teh moment staying. No doubt there will be meany long evening sitting around the fire having many long interesting intelelectual debates and much Cognac drinking! Mwryse, he canot wait!

À bientôt!


Thursday, 9 October 2008

Uh oh...

Oh No. Maurice is back in France. Quick everybody! We have to move to another continent before he finds us! What's a squirrel to do, eh? Well, goin' back to Norway might be best move for Ratatoskr. Not Maurice's cup of tea, Norway. Too cold for Maurices.

Good luck everyone! And remember: DON'T ENGAGE MAURICE IN CONVERSATION
(oh boy, would you be in for it then!!!)

Yours sqirrelishly,


Wednesday, 8 October 2008

Maerhese in Paerese (again!)

Well mes amis the great geynius Muawrise is again once again in Paris!! He got to France back yesterday, and was much happy to be there.

Alas, his flightt back took seven days rather than the 52 hours it intended to take was meant to, because the Atterrissage Forcé pilot he wonce again got wery lost, and took long time to France find. Then he in Paris not Armidale France landed!

Still, Mwrwse in Paris is glad to be back, and he the flight over is glad that it is. Now he just has to overcome his KILLER JET LAG. I mean, mes amis, THIS is WORSE than last time! After all, mes amis, LAST TIME the flight only 78 HOURS took! This time it 172 hours took!!!1!

Eh bien. Muwryse will now have a few days to spend enjoying life in Paris France, in his apartment most beautitufl on Rue Mouffetard. Then He to Armidale France will drive. First he a new car must buy. Maybe he a Bugatti Veyron will buy. He has these read nice cars are.

Yes. That like a nice car looks. And Muaerise he still some of the spare credit cards he borrowed earlier from the Capitan of the SS Cado still has. Maybe he will a Bugatti as a welcome home present himself buy,

Wednesday, 1 October 2008

Wihs Maerwse luck!

Muarhuse, he is flying back to Armidale France today! His flight, it is being called RIGHT NOW, so he cannot much say here. He much looking forward to getting back and onto his new job getting on. He will post again soon when in France he is.

This time, Muruse will be flying with Atterrissage Forcé Ultra-Premium Executive First Class wonce again, just like last time. Mes amis, it was the flying expereince of the century! Far better than any other hairyplane flight that Muirhse with other airlines had been on. There were even buttons on the seat airm rest to call a air stewardess! And they would even you a glass of water get if you them asked!! And the glass it was only slightly smudged and maybe even clean!!! This was an unprecedented hexperience for Mwrwse.

OOPS final call mes amis !! eh bien maurice hhe muhst goe knoww

Sunday, 28 September 2008

A new job for Maurise!

MES AMIS!! Muwryse he good news much has! He a new job has!!!

Last night, he was in his house moust beautitiful in Paris Australia when he a telelephone calll got! The Université de la Nouvelle-Angleterre in Armidale France has given Muaroswe a job, as professor of norse archaeology and cybertechology. Muarise, he wait cannot!

Well, mes amis, he has not yet decided what courseses he will be there teaching. You will be able to find out at:
Watch that spot mes amis!!!

Rest assured though, mes amis, that Muaryse will still his course "HIS987 The Norse Gods and Oral Hygiene: A study of Dental Wash and Dental Floss Usage Before AD 1100" for thte Université du Délire Iguane teachinate. He will not let his students most loyal down! No, mes amis, he will not!!!

Wednesday, 24 September 2008


Mes amis, it has been long too long since Muawruse a post on his weblogue most estemmed has a post made! Well, dear readers, you need worry no more! Maerhyse he is back.

Alas, Muyrwise he was for many days lost. In August late, he for a pint of milk went out to buy. Well, this he managed fine enough mes amis, but he on his way back got lost! So he walked for days and days, mes amis, weeks even, before finally getting back to his hosue&home last night. Well, Muaowse can just draw some comfort from the fact that this sort of inconwenience, to Muairuse it does not happen often.

Eh bien, that is all for now folks. Soon Mauwruse will be from Paris Australia to Armidale France be going. Wish him for his flight luck!

Friday, 29 August 2008

The talk most magnifique!

Mes amis! Mwryse his talk was went so much well! It, it was most wonderful! The most fascinating and interesting talk to be this year given!

And his audience, of Maerwse they were most appreciative! As many as seven (7!) people came, and at least ten percent of them remained RIGHT up to the finish of the talk by Murrhyse the magnifique.

The professor of the department, he was so overcome with joy that he burst in to tears. He said, "Well Muwruse, you have really set your reputation in this town for good!" ANd Miuyrse he must with him agree. Now Mauwryse will be the favourite resident of Paris Australia, in demand much for speeches and talks at all occaisions. Will Mwarose he have the time to all of this do? Miorhyse he knows not!

Well, MES AMIS, soon Muarhse will have to go back to university, and his course "HIS987 The Norse Gods and Oral Hygiene: A study of Dental Wash and Dental Floss Usage Before AD 1100" for thte Université du Délire Iguane teachinate. How Murise he cannot wait!

It most exciting is, but my little would be étudiants, you can already for this course most magnifique enrole online! Just your web browsers point to http://student.uni-delireiguane.fr/EN/units/HIS/HIS987/ENROL-ONLINE/ to enrol online! And soon you will be basking in the genius of Mawruse.

Wednesday, 27 August 2008

Talk tonight!!

Mes amis, Muarwse his talk on tonight is! The details, they are here:

Title: Elephants and Iguanas in Viking and Pre-Viking Norweigan Art
Speaker: Mawruse de Parfossor
Time: 8:30 pm - 10:00 pm (including 15 minte break)
Location: Room π/2, Unsta Ble-Wobbly Building, Archaeology Department, University of Paris Australia

More details:

Well, mes amis, I will not much more writinate as Muarywse he must for the big evening prepare! But if you are in Paris, Australia do feel free to come to the talk!!! Muarise he looks forward to seeing you there!

Eh bien, Muwrse he must go now! He has a talk to prepare!!!

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

Oh Noes!!!

Mawrhyçe he has just off the telephone got. He a call from the gendarmerie, with news most bad for Murrhy∫e.

Morhise, his house in Armidale France had been into broken! La police said that it looked as if nothing had been taken, but the theaf he or she had for something been looking. La police,they thought maybe the theif for a document or map was looking, as all the filing cabinets had been gone through, and pictures off the wall had been taken.

This, it most bad is, mes amis. Murrhyse he will ring Aglie this evening, maybe he advice for Mauruse might have. Also, he can maybe Agliè tell that the map Murrhise he pretended to have probably stolen was. Then Aglié will stopm Maurhyse for it pestering. He most insistent that this map at all costs must have, so Mawrose him told that it in Armidale France was. And then the house de Mauruse in Armidale France it was burgeled. SO that is a good excuse for Mirise to pretend that he the map did really have but now alas no longer does as it stolenated was. So alas, now he to Agli~e cannot it lend.

Still, Muiruse hopes that nothing of his was really stolen... He will have to Ratatoskr get to check the place out for Muiaryse,

Sunday, 17 August 2008

Arrived in Australia!!

Well, of course mes amis merrhuse he arrived in Australia some days ago! He on the 3rd August AD 2008 set out, and now it is the 17th. Mes amis, Muaruse he did not his raeders most devoted in suspense want to keep, but he jet lag most terrible had!

The plane flight, it was than last time much better. The flight, it took 78 hours -- it only 52 hours was meant to take but the pilot he got lost and a few rwong turnings took. Eh bien, it was good to in Sydney hair port finally touch down. But after a flight so long Murrhyse he killer jet lag had!

Mes amis, Murrhuse then to Paris in Australia drive. It was a long drive, and Muiryse he kept falling asleep at the wheel. This, it was not good! Even with Maurhyse his built-in in-car espresso machine he could not keep up enough with enough espresso coffe to Muarwse him keep awake. SO he along the way in Bruges, Australia had to stop. Well, at least now Muirrhyse he a new iPHONE for Maerhose his Australian mobile phone account has, having one in Bruges bought.

After this braek, Murruse he to Paris Australia drove on. He then the next few days in his home spent recovering from Jet Lag.

Mes amis, would you beleive that Muawruse the first phone call on his Australian iPHoNe 3G new was from his friend new mon ami Agliè? And yet, mes amis, it was so. He seemed most agitated, and wanted to know if a map of a secret templar castle muairuse he had claimed to have could Aglié he borrow from Muarhsye? Alas, Murarise this map does not really have. Myuarise is too clever to this admit though. Mourise he told Agl~eie that it in his house in Armidale France had it left. I wonder if he Moiruse believes...

Sunday, 3 August 2008


Mes amis, Mowryse he cannot type much now because he at the HAIRPORT is to from Armidale France to Paris Australia fly back so that Mueruse he his lecture can give in Paris Australia. But still, he did not want to disappoint his raeders most devoted, who must be wondering what Miurrhyse he is doing.

Well, Muirhyse this time his is flying first class. No more cattle class for Murise, mes amis! Muarhyse, he will be treating himslef to teh luxury of Atterrissage Forcé Ultra-Premium Executive First Class, as he promiced himself!. Mes amis, you can raed all about the LUXURY murrise he will be experiencing at http://www.atterrissage-forcé.fr/en/fly-af/international/747/Ultra-Premium-Exec-First-Class/.

Now I must bid adieu to my raeders most loyal. Muaruse his flight is being called now mes amis! He is looking forward to getting to Paris Australia and his talk giving to a huge and adoring audience. he just hopes the same thing that happened last time he to Australia tried to fly does not again happen.! Wish him luck, mes amis!!!!

Monday, 28 July 2008

Dinner with Agliè!!

Mes amis, the dineer to which mon ami Agliè invited Mauerowse, it was not an unmitigated triumphf for Murrhise. It all started badly when Maurise he the blackcurrent cordial with him took, rather than the Romanée-Conti wine. Aglie, aparently he would have the wine preferered.

Still, Mon Ami Aglie he at least some of his own wine had to with Miurhuse share. Miureise regaled Àglìè with many of Muyruse his tales of adwenture about the many times Murrise he has been stranded and lost in remote places. He was mid way throiugh a tale of Miuwryse his time in Norway, when mon ami Aglei he became most agitated, and said he rememebered an ergent matter with which he must attend.

Still, Murise is never disappointed when his friends suddenly have to ask him to leave for no apparent raison. Murise he had enjoyed an evening most magnifique, apart from these few minor mishaps. Aglie and Muiwryse they discussed many interesting things, and shared much knowledge unique and estoric. Aglie told Muawryse all about the Knights Templar, and Muawryse he told Aglei all about line dancing in Switzerland and Swaziland, and also all about Muirise hs NEW SECOND HAND CAR,, teh DODGE.

Ah well, Muirase he is certain that he will with Mon Ami Aglie get to on many occiasions in the future have many exciting and stimulatiting discussions. Muarise, he cannot wait!

Thursday, 24 July 2008

Visitng Paris Australia soon!

Mes amis! Mawriuse he is hard at work preparing his université courses. It, it is just routine work for a geynius such as Muriusçe. Still, he is enjoying in his house most beautiful in teh south of France once again being.

Tonight, he is going to visit the home of his neighbour Agliè, who he in Armidale, France met only just recently. My new friend Agliè has Muarise invited over for dinner, and Maurise cannot wait! Only, Muawriçe, he is only uncertain what to take with him. Would mon ami Agliè prefer a bottle of Romanée-Conti Pinot Noir (of which Maerowse seems to have lots in his cellar here), or maybe he would a bottle of Blackcurrant cordial? Murise, he cannot decide!!!

But the good news does not stop, mes amis! Murrhyse he recently an invitation to speak at the University of Paris Australia (www.upa.edu.au) received!!! This, it is the University in the town in Australia where Muirhy∫e he a home has! Well, mes amis, get ready for the news most exciting: Muyrise is coming to australia next month, and will a talk on "Elephants and Iguanas in Viking and Pre-Viking Norweigan Art" be giving. Watch out for detials on exactly when & where this talk it will be held at http://archaeology.upa.edu.au/events/2008/!

For those who have not the pleasure of a visit to PARIS Austaliaia had, here here is a map from mon ami google showing where it is in Australia:

View Larger Map

Eh bien, mes amis, Murrhyse must a flight there book soon. No cattle class for Maurowçe this time! No, meurhoouse he will KWONTAS FIRST CLASS be flyinating this time!

Watch this sapce! Muawrise will you keep infromed!

Sunday, 20 July 2008

Back in the South of France!!!!!

Well, mes amis, it was a long drive back to Armidale France to Maerrhyse his house keys for his house in the south of france pick up. But now, Muroce he has them. And Mawryse he is now safe in his house & home in teh south of france once again.

Soon, Maerowse will of his adventures walking to Armidale France write so that his raeders most devoted can all about it raed. ALso, he must his new course "HIS987 The Norse Gods and Oral Hygiene: A study of Dental Wash and Dental Floss Usage Before AD 1100" for hte Université du Délire Iguane prepare.

But now, mes amis, murrhise he must get some sleep. It was too long a drive, mes amis, too long!

Sunday, 13 July 2008

Oh no!!!!!

Mes amis, Mawrêyce he just at his home in teh south of france once again arrivenated. Well, he was to be back home once again much happy.

But alas! Woe! When he his house keys picked up to unlock his front door, he noticed that they were scaly, not metallic. Also, the keys they started to snigger. Mårrowse much shocked was. Then the keys wriggled out of Murrhuses hands, and ran away into the garden. Oh no! It, it was not the house keys de Murise! It, it was the chameleon in disguise again!!

Well, Murrhise he knows not what to do. He only one option now has. He must to his house in Armidale France return, and get the real keys of his south of france home. Then he must once more drive back to teh south of france.

Well, mes amis, Muiuruse he is in his old Dodge car sitting right now. Once he on this post has hit the "PUBLISH POST" button, he will then put aside his laptop comptutor and to Armidale France drive off again once more.

Wish him luck, mes amis!!!

Thursday, 10 July 2008

Back in Amridale France!!

Well, mes amis, Maerhuse he is très perturbé to in Amridale once more again be! He left here only a few days ago to to his house in teh south of France go.

But alas! Catastrophe! When he there got, he found that he had the keys for his south of france house in Armidale France left!

So Maerowse he got into his car, and to Armridale once again drove. And now he is in teh living room of his Armidale hosue. HEre, there are two sets of keys on the mantelpiece and Maeurose he has his correct huose keys grabbed, and now Muwrhyse he must bid his raedership loyal adieu, aas he off to teh south of france once again once more drives. This time with his house keys!!!!

Sunday, 6 July 2008

Second hand car blues, mes amis!

Maewrose, he is on his way back to his chateau most magnifique in teh south of france. Moiruse, he will much be looking forward to getting bakc.

Yesterday, he a car second hand bought in a used car uaction run by teh local polise department -- alas this car it is not as good as Muawryse his rolls royse. It, it a 1974 Dodge Monaco sedan is. But MUIURHHEÇE he does not his credit cards have wiht him, so it will have to do.

Eh bien, this car new it has a cop motor, a 440-cubic-inch plant. Also, it it has cop tires, cop suspension, cop shocks. It, it is a model made before catalytic converters is so it it will on gas regular run. Muiurice he just needs to the cigarette lighter fix. Then it, it will be good. However, Maerhose cannot imagine that this car, it will survive long. Probably it, it will fall apart when Murrhyçe he to his destination arrives.

Maerise his new car
Photo by Soldermelons

Well, Miuroçe many a tale of his journey long has to tell! How he hitched lifts on open train carraiges, and borrowed cars from freindly towns when he them needed. He walked for many days, and drove or rode for many more. He knew not where he was! Eh bien, he at last to his heath and home his way back found. Just the worng house, mes amis.

Now he must be off again, off to the south of france! Wish him bon voyage, mes amis!

Thursday, 3 July 2008

My friend new Agliè

Mes amis, Meawrose is his stay in teh north of fRance much enjoying. Still, he is to his house in teh south of frAnce much looking forward to getting back home.

And it is about this that Murrhise he wants to write. Mon ami, you may rememeber well that time when Miruse he went for an evening walk near his home in the SOUTH of france, and made a few wrong terns and somehow Murroswse he in the NORTH of france ended up. Well, that walk mes amis was so Miurruse could his neighbours there meet.

Well, imagine the suprise de Mwerrhyse when he bumpted into a gentlemen here who he is a neighbour of in teh SOUTH of france! This man, his name it is M. Agliè, and Mierowse much happy to make his acquantance is. We of many things talked, including the Knights Templar and the high cost of velcro (M. Agliè thinks that this, it is a conspiracie most evil of The Bavarian Illuminati!).

Well, sadly mon nouvel ami had to teh south of france again go back very suddenly, in mid conversation in fact (we had just got to the bit where Maerowse he was his book the Mouth Wash of the Gods going to discuss). Still, Mairuse looks forward to seeing him in the south of france once again much!

Monday, 30 June 2008

The Long Juorney of Maeurose Part 1

Maerowse he thought you might like to see the route which Muarrhyse he took whilst he was lost. Luckily, Mirrhuse had a GPS tracking device in his bag, so was able to his route most magnifique recreate for the viewing pleasure of his audeience most devoted.

Eh bien, here it is mes amis:

Agrandir le plan

Stay tuned mes amis for future blog posts giving a full account of the long journey of Meurrhsye. Maybe he could even a book about it write! It could be calleed The Long Journey of Maurriçe.

À bientot,

Sunday, 29 June 2008

At home in Armidale, France

Maerowse, he once again is in his modest home most baeutiful near Armidale in northeast France. Mes amsi, here is a picture of this most beauautiful hose that Merriuse he has used on this wobleg before:

By Steve Jurvetson, on wikipedia

Well, mes amis, Muaryse he is much releived to be in his own hosue&home back again. Well, mes amsis, he now feels a rest he must have. Then he will to his house le South of FRance go back, and get started on his new Novel. 

Also, he will start preparing for his new unit he will be taeching called "HIS987 The Norse Gods and Oral Hygiene: A study of Dental Wash and Dental Floss Usage Before AD 1100". THis, it is based on matearial from Maeroshes book Teh Mouthwash of the gods which will of course the set text for the course be.

Enrole now, mes amis! It will be a course most magnifique, and mAeruhse he predicts that it will be oversubscribed wihtin seconds of being offered. SECONDS, mes amis!

More on his novel new later, mes amis....

Found at last!

MES AMIS!!!! Mawrise has just noticed that his new iphonE 3G, it has GPS! And maps! And GPS! And maps! Saved, Maerowse is saved!

Hmm... lets see, amis, where is Maerowse? Le IPHONE, it is just now getting a fix on le sattelitles so it can Mawurse tell where he is. Ah! There. Marrhose he is near Armidale in Northeast france. Sacre bleu! This cannot be! Maewrise when he went for his walk was at his chateau in the south of France!! How could he the whole of France have walked accross to get to Armidale without noticing?

Eh bien, Maeurroise he much releived is. It just a short walk to his home in Armidale, France is. Soon he will be home and dry, once again in his Armidael home which he loves wery much mes amis. And hopefully that dratted chameleon is nowhere nearby.

Saturday, 28 June 2008

Inadaquate food

Mes amis, Meaerowse has been lost in the woods for he knows not how long, walking and walking hoping that he would his château most beautitufl again find eventually. But alas, it was not to be. Maurhise he has not his way home found. 

He has been eating blackberriess and mushrooms and acorns and believe me, mes amis, they are no substitues for the wonders Murrhuse his chef can whip up in le kitchen! Last night he was reduced to eating a caesar salad he found in a hollow log, wiht only blackforest gateau that he in a hollow tree trunk found for desert.

Also, Miuriçe thinks that he has the chameleon seen a couple of times. This is most distristressing, not good mes amis.

Eh bien, Muawruse is sure that he will home again get wery soon. Moiurse is a geynius, and for a GEYNIUS such as him NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!! NOTHING, mes amis!!!!!!

Friday, 27 June 2008


Mes amis, Maurise he for a walk in the countryside around his chateau went four days ago. But alas, catastrophe most profound, he took a turning rwong on his way home and now he cannot his way home find. Also, he has just off a log fallen. it hurt, mes amis, and now Maerowçe he has mud all over him. This is not befitting the diginity of a geynius like Mouriße!!

Alll he knows now is that he is in some woods somewhere, and he for days has been walking. If you Maerose anywhere see, say hello and tell him where he is mes amis! He to his chateau much wants to get home. He misses his study and his lovely dinning room and also the food in aforementioned lovely dinning room becasue merrise has not had anything to eat for DAYS mon ami DAYS!

Still, Muiruse is as ever shure that he will to his home once again make it back. Wish him luck, mes amis!

Maurice, blogging LIVE on his iPhone 3G whilst LOST in the WOODS!

Sunday, 22 June 2008

Dial a geynius Attempt 2!

Okay, mes amis, so the first attempt it did not work. Alas, Miruse could not remeber his mobile telephone numbers.

But not to wory, mes amis, he will give you his landline number.

Okay. The number of the telefone of his house here in the south of france is +33 4 -- err, Morrise canot the rest remmememeber.

Okay. The telefone number of his flat on Rue Mouffetarde it is +33 1 -- er again he cannot the rest of the number rember.

Okay. The telephone number of his house in Armidale in France it is +33 3, er.

Okay. New plan. The phone number of his house in Paris in Australia, it is +61 2 677 err. Hmm. Maerrose he can rember more of this number, but alas it is not enough!

Hmm. New plan, mes amis. Mowerussse he will try to withtth RATATATATOSKR get in touch. He will let you know.

Saturday, 21 June 2008

Dial a genius!

Mawruse has decided to give out his iPhone mobile telefone number on his interweb page, so that you his raedership most devoted and most loyal, can with such a great geynius get to speak! An unprecedented opportunity for his raedership most devoted!

Mes amis, the phone number it is +33 6 -- er hang on, Morrhuse he cannot remember the phone number of his iPhone! THis is most distressing. Maybe Ratatsokr, he will know.

Actually, maybe you can all ring Mowrise his Australian mobil telefone. Mes amis it is +61 4 -- err, mes amis Moruse he cannot that remember either. Alas! Catastrophe!!

Muaerrise he will Ratatatoskr contact, and to you all get back.

Thursday, 19 June 2008

Readers Questions

From: Chameleon [chameleon@snigger.com.mg]
To: Ratatoskr
Subject: iPhones

So you did end up going to Australia to "acquire" an iPhone for Maurice eh?



Nope, Ratatoskr didn't. Said it wasn't gonna happen, it didn't can't and won't. End of story. Had a very important package to deliver for the All Father. One that the Hooded One, Grimnir, just couldnt trust anyone else with. Can't say any more. Nope, not even for acorns. He ain't called the Terrible One for nothing.

Still, Ratatoskr did preorder a 3G iPhone. But it's for himself, not Maurice. Just wait till Maurice finds out, eh? Oh boy, oh boy will that be fun. Stand back and watch the fireworks.

Yours squirrelishly,


Wednesday, 18 June 2008

That Maurice fella. Heh.

Don't think that just because you've not heard from him, Ratatoskr's not been busy. No sir, I've been one busy little squirrel. Indeed I have. Been to Norway, then last week to Iceland and now in Australia for a week. Rained. Not fair. Not fun, fur got wet. But not to worry, never fear Ratatoskr doesn't let some rain stop him! No sir, had some messages to deliver but done that now. Now got time to rest & relax. Or at least race around looking for acorns and dodging Wagner.

But that Maurice character! Now he has a new iPhone he keeps wanting to ring Ratatoskr up. Phone keeps ringing, every ten minutes. All but two times its been that Maurice fella. Maybe should answer it some time. He might even have something important to say. That'd be a change, eh?

Still. More important stuff to worry about. Like acorns. And hazelnuts. And acorns. And peanuts. And acorns. Ooops, there goes the phone again. Just Maurice. Let's all just pretend I'm not here, eh?

Yours nuttily,
Ratatoskr Squirrel.

Friday, 13 June 2008

IPHONE 3G!!!!!!!!

Mes amis, Maewrosr has just recently of teh luanch of teh NEW 3G ipone read. Now Mearose wants one! His old iphone it seems outdated by comparison. But woe is Mearruse! The new iPohne it does not luanchinate until 11th July, 17th Julie in FRance (which is where Maerhose he is now). What is a Maerorse to do?

Well, this mronign Mawuruuuçe took himself down to the warehouses of Orange France, and climbed the high walls and dodged security guards, and mes amis he is now please do be able to tell you that he now an ipHone 3G himself has! Also, he has his agents in aUstraliaia even now working for him to get an Australian iphOne for Morise his Australian SIM card. Merise will not be left out or left behind, No sir he will not!

Maurise cannot wait to a phone call on his new iphoNe make. Also he is certain that a device this elegant, it MUST the new emails make arrive in Murrhyçe's inbox!

Monday, 9 June 2008

Raeders Wroight

Horray! Maerowse has an email!

From: Captain Jerrold von Obiwankanobe [jvobi@covert-ops.cia.gov]
To: Maurice de Perfossor [maurice.deperfossor@hotmail.fr]
CC: Ratatoskr.Squirrel@GMAIL.COM
Subject: Credit cards

MAURICE! I know you've got my credit cards and are using them! So that's where my bag went. I ask that you must stop using the ones that belong to me immeadiatly, or there will be further consequences. The others, I do not care about. They were just ones I had stolen in any case. Interpol might care though.


Capt Jerrold von Obiwankanobe
Captain, S.S. Cado
Sink Fleet Fleet Ships Ltd
"We are definately not a CIA front company!"(tm)


Email: capt.j.vonobi@sscado.sinkfleetltd.com
Tel: +1 540 555 0153
Satellite mobile: +1 540 555 0139

Oh no! Maerowse knows not what to do! He had not thought that the Kapitan, he might object to A GENIUS such as MAEORUSE his credit cards using! ALso, Mawrise did not think that maybe some of these credit cards might be ones that the CAPITAN he had stolen.

Murrhose know not what to do. He is scared and confused. He also wonders what these 'CONSEQUENCES' of which the capitan speaks might be. Mawrise hopes it involves chocolate cake.

Ah well, just to cheer himself up mes amis he is buying himself another Rolls Royce on this credit card. He is sure that just one more should a problem not be.

Thursday, 5 June 2008

Oh nO!

Maerowse, he was taking his newly foundedinated traesure to the auction house Christies to be valualuated when suddenly it started sniggering. Mes amis, this really was too much for Marrhose for him to bear!

He the Rolls Royse car stopped, and had another look at the treasure chest. Mes amis, it still seemed as traesure chesty as before, but then suddenly it started moving! Maewrose he was most amazed, but then he the turht realized. The chest of treasure, it was not a treast of chesure, it was a CHAMELEON! The CHAMELEON had it had struck again, and left Murrise destituete and upset, the same as before.

It was with a heart broken that Muowrise he towards his Chateau headed back. There was to be no treasure for Mairowse todauy. Drat that chameleleleleon!

Wednesday, 4 June 2008

Burried Treasure!!!!!

Mes amis, it is true! Mawrose he has in his garden found a buried treasure. Eh bien, he was last night in his jardin walking wehn he upon a treasure chest stumbled. "That it is strange" he to himself thought "Maooroise he wonders what this it could be?" So Moawruse he opened the chest, and it full of gold coins and goblets and coronets and necklaces and other such treasures was full.

Well, Maireuse he was of course most excited. He this treasure into the house took. He will of course an Auction house rign soon, he want s to sell this Traesure for much money to help him by all the stuff Mawroseh he wants. Maybe he can that Rembranddt painting he has his eye on had buy now.

In any case, this must be the best discoverie Maerose he has ever stumbled acrosssss MeS AMis!

Friday, 30 May 2008

Not that CHAMELEON again!!!!

Oh no! It really is too much, mes amis. This chameleeon, it is a plague on Maerose. Just yesterday, Marrhose he went to have a drink from his cup of coffee and his cup it turned out to be le chameleon again disguised as Mawroyse's hot beverage liquid drink. Merise, he was most upset and most agitated he was. He knew not what to do! The chemeleon it slid away sniggering, but Maerise he knows it will be back. And Maowruse he never wrong is.

Also, just today Morrhuse he noticed that the the credit cards he off the capitan of the SS Cado got all have different names on them. This is odd, even though they are the cards of the Captain only one has his name on it. A couple have names that Morrhuse recognises as being the nomes de plumes of the Capitan, but others he knows not. Who is this M. Directeur Exécutif de l'Unicef that is on one of these cards named? Maerose he knows not.

He hopes that this person is not minding that Maerose he used this cerdit card to buy his house!

Saturday, 24 May 2008

Oh noes!!!1!

Oh no!!!!1! Mes amis, Maerowse he was in the garden this mroning walkin,g when he a sight most horrible met his eyes:


That is right, mes amis! It is that chameleon again! Mawreese, he thought he had this reptile most fiendish shaken off! But alas, it was not to be. It must be stalking Mowrose, mes amis. He does not know how to get away from it!

Oh what to do, my friends, Marwose for once does not know what to do!

Friday, 23 May 2008

A walk through teh gardens

Mes amis, Mawrose he is still enjoying in his new house being, He has just a walk through the gardens most extenisve and most beautiful been for. He some photographs of that jardin most beautiful thought that his readers most devoted might like to see. Eh bien, mon ami, they are here:

Maroses garden

Merrhuses garden

Mirrhoses garden

Tuesday, 20 May 2008

Found a HOUSE mes amis!!!1!

Mes amis, Mawrose has the house most beautiful found. Mes amis, it is Maerowses dream most wonderful come true! Maurise, he has a chateau near Arles in le South de France just bought! Mes amis, you would not believe how bauetiful it is just already! Mes amis, it everthign has!

It is a small mediaeval chateau, with towers and everythhing that Maerose he could possibly want. Mes amis, it is of the most buaetiful stone built, and it it is in the position most beautiful. Also, it gardens most beautiful has. Maerowse he will in them be able to walk whilst he is his next best selling book writing! He has a good fieling about it already!!

There was just the small matter of money, but such a great geynisu as Mearose does not with such trivial details concern himself. Eh bien, he just one of the Capitans credit cards handed over, and this it seemed to be acceptable.

Maurhese knows that his audiense most adoring would not let him go without posting some photos. Here they are. Enjoy, mes amis!

Maeroses castle

Mawrises castle

Marhoses castle

Murrhyses castlle

Saturday, 17 May 2008

Rolls Royce Phantom VS. Lada 1500

Mes amis, this Rolls Roise voiture neuve is much much better than the Lada that Mauresee he used to drive. It is a blessing that he the car keys for the Lada lost and had to a new car buy! In any case, Merose he a new car deserved. And it was just lucky that he a credit card had so that he could for it pay.

In any case, Mes Amis, Mawrose he now in the SOufht of France is. He will let you Know how he with house hunting gets on. Wish him luck!!!!

Friday, 16 May 2008

Nice Rolls Royce goes to Nice, Mes amis!

Mawruse cannot it believe! He could not his car keys find yesterday! He was up till all hours of the night for them searching. And yet, he found them not. Mes amis, You could not imagin how upset Merrhyse he was. He was meant to yesterday to the South of France go to start house hunting.

Then, Mawriçe he rememebered that he still has the credit cards from the captans bag that he took off of the capitian of the S.S. Cado. So, this morning Mærose he took himslef to the local car dæler and bought himslef a Rolls Royce Phantom Using the capitans credit card. What a kind man this capitan is! This card, it will also come in handy when Maeroße he buys himslef that house in the Sout h of France he wants.

Eh bien. Maerohyse he must go now, he needs to the South of France to drive. He cannot wait to his new Rollys Roice test out! It's five hundred and seventy nine miles to Nice, Maerose has a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and Merhyse is wearing sunglasses. Hit it, mes amis!

Monday, 12 May 2008

Merrhose in Paris (again)

Mawrose he has in Paris arrived once again, mes amis. He will of course his raedership most loyal updtate more fully as soon as he can.

Also, he will investigate the mystery of why every one in Paris they have started spaeking Breton since Morise he was last here. It is quite strange mes amis.

Eh bien, Moiruse he is much overjoyed to in Paris be back once again. It looks like he that chameleon managed to shake off tooo...

Sunday, 11 May 2008

On teh plane

Merrose, he is on teh plane back from Colombia to France at last mes amis! Horray! Merose, he is overjoyed. Also, the plane it has WIFI. Maerose, he is of this even more overjoyedd.

He is most upset thoughg that he cannot a signal on his Apple iPhone get, he has been trying to make a fone call on it. Allso, the stewardess she is much intent on harrassing Merise to turn his iPhone off. Also, Marose has tried useing Skype on the hairyplane wifi network but it works not.

Ah, at least he can use the airplane skyphon. This, it is wery expensive but never fear! Mearose still has the credit cards from the captians bag that he took off of the captitan of the S.S. Cado.

Still, he at least will in Paris be soon. And now he must get on the fone to M. Garamond, Merisess'es publisher most esteemeed.

Léàvïng Bogotá

Mes amis, Mawruse he has himslef on a flyte to Parrhyse booked, that it it is leaving in just a few hours. Mawrisse bids a fond fairwell to Bogotå, and must himself a taxi hail to the airport to get to. Nonetheleees, he will of course his readership most loyal keep infromed of the details of his fligte back to Paris.

See you in Paris, mes amis!

Friday, 9 May 2008

Crash landed!

Mawrise, he did it! He finally manaaged to control the escape pod, and pilot it back to earth! With no damage to Maerise or anything else important (he did slightly flatten a mountain range just next to Bogotá). AS you may guess, Merose he was aiming for Paris but got Bogotá instead. Near enogh, mes amis, near enough. Right planet ,anway. And for MAWRISE, that, it is better than nothing. Much better than northing.

In any case, Mweryse he is pleased to be back on palnet earth once again. He landeded last night, and is wery glad to have done so. He is staying in a hotel in the center of the city, and is even noew trying to book his plane tickets (or tockets? Mawruse he can never rememememeber) back to Paris again.

When he to Paris gets back once again he will start in earnerst for a house in the south of fRance looking mes amis. He will be wisiting their real soon now to have a look round. Wish him luck mes amis!!!

~~ MERRUSE, bloggging LIVE from his HOTEL ROOM in BOGOTÁ, COLOMBIA!!!

Thursday, 8 May 2008

Running out of oxiegen

Mes amis, Mawrise is still Lost in SPace! He knows not what to do mes amis. Also, the oxygen it is running out and Mero∫e he has read that without oxygen he cannot breathe. Mirosse has also read that this, it is not a good thing. SO Moerhhyse he has to figure out how to pilot this escape pod back to Paris BEFORE he out of oxiegen runs. This sounds almost imposible.

Lucky Mowruçe is a geynius and so for Marrrhise nothing is imposssible, mes amis, NOTHIGN!

Tuesday, 6 May 2008


Moaurise, he cannot figure out how to control teh escape pod. He wants to figure out how to it make land near PAris, but alas he cannot this figure out. He must, as he does not want forever to in orbit stay. Must be one of these butttons that the pod makes it land.

Maybe Mariose will ask this passing astronaut. He might know.

Monday, 5 May 2008

Tiresome arguments

Mawrise, he hates arguments mes amis. Aruging with lesser minds than the geynius that is Merrose (and lets face it mes amis, since Moariçe is such a great geynius, all other minds are lesser minds than Moruisße) tears the attention of Moruse away from his great work most essential, and drags him down to the petty level of these other peopel most miserabel. He likes it not mes amis!

This mroning, Moruses he awoke early and went out to with Zafod speak. M. Zaphod he was on the telephone speaking on the telepone. M. Zaphod, when he had finished speaking he said that he with some one named Trillian had speaking been. "Yeah," he said "I kinda agreed to pick her up from the shops, y'know? Yeah, it's just nearby the horsehead nebula, won't take long. Wanna come along Moses?"

Merose he most indignant was. He does not to the Horsehed nebula want to go. He to Paris wants to go back right now! But M. Zaphod, he most insistent was most insistent! There an argument most immense was! But, mes amis, Moiruse most inteligant is. And he can out of any problem hsi way think. So Moirace he preteneded to agree with Zafphod and got M. Zaphlod to think agreed. He even helped Zaphod rewire the control pannel and put the peices back togehther where Meoirise had kind of wiht a chair smashed them whilst with Zafod he was arguing.

But then, mes amis, he went back out to the back of the ship, and snuck into the escape pod of the ship. He the escape pod luanched, and disappeared off. Moiruse he know must figure out how to the escape pod work so that he can get to Paris back. He currently in orbit of earth is. Just need to figure out how to use the camera on this iPhone mes amis, Meoruse could some beauttiful pictures now take!

Saturday, 3 May 2008

Rescued, mes amis, Rescued!

As predicted in these pages earlier in le week, it has happened mes amis Merose he has been resuced! Too brilliant to hide his light under a bush being trapped in a remote corner of the globe, the Genyius that is Merose got himself rescued at long last.

Gentle reader, it happened somewhat like this:

Merrhuse, he was having an animated discussion about Proust with a reindeer. When suddenly, there was a bright light in the sky, and everything around all around wery bright was. When finally Mawrise he could see again, Mawro∫e he saw it was a perfectly white, spherical space ship. Mawrhyse, he was much amazed. Eventually. a man with two heads out of the space ship came. Merose, he was even more amazaed. "Hi," this man he said, "I'm Zaphod. Heard you needed rescuing, yeah?" Merrise he agreed that this indeed was the case, as indeed it the case was.

Zaphod, he explained to Marose explanainitorially that the ship, she is call Le Coeur d'Or, and the ship she most beautiful is. ALmost as boutiful as Mawriuse himself! Almost, mes amis, but not quite.

Eh bien, it is good that Meroise he is finally rescued. Tomorrow, MEroise he will ask Zaphod to take Mawrise to Parise. Mareise thought he must let his readers most devoted know the wonderful news most wonderful. It is lucky theire is wireless internat on the Heart of Gold mes amis, not even Moriße's satttalite telephones can here a signal get!

MAWRUSE, blogging LIVE from THE HEART OF GOLD, which it is currently IN ORBIT of PLANET EARTH, in SPACE mes amis!

Thursday, 1 May 2008

Still House Hunting

Meriçse, he has the entire day spent talking on his satelite phone, talking to real estate agents in the south of france. It is hapening, mes amis, it is happengin! Finally, Mawriße he will his dream haus in the south of fRance get. If only he can from the Nroth of Norway escaep!

Merrhise he hope satelite telephone calls do not cost much, he has made so many. HE made many calls both in Nroway and in the Dessert Island on which he, the geynius, was trapped. Maybe sateelite phone calls, they are free.

Oh well, in any case Mawruse he will soon from hsi Arctic Hideawya be rescued wery soon mes amis!

Monday, 28 April 2008

House Hunting. Virtual stlye.

Hmm, Maybe this house it would for Merrise be good enough:


No, mes amis, it too modeste for a geynius such as Merrhiçe is. This one, ah mes amis, this one it is more suited for the genie du Merise:


Or maybe this one:


Oh! THe indecisiion! MErrhyse, he cannot his mind make up. ITs too much, mes amis, too much. THese houses, they are all too beautiful. And Merrise, his laptop batterie is about to die mes amis...


Greetings from sunny Norway mes amis! Acutally, this it is just Merrises little joke. Its not sunny is wery cold here and Meriçe he has the past few weeks spent shivering constantly. Ah Meroße he pines for warmer climes. He promices himself that onse he gets away from here, he will himself a new house on the south coast of france buy himself. One with at least 100 rooms. ANd NO PERMAFROST.

Still, Merrhiçe a wisitor again at least had. The tall gentelman with the one eye called again today. He, he had two (2) pet ravens with him. Merose, he thinks theyre names were Huginn and Muninn, or Muninn and Huginn, Mawrui∫se he cannot rememebr alas. Still, this Strange wisitor a present at least to Mawrusse gave, he him a beautiful long spear this time gave. MErrhse was most flattered, it most beauutiful is though mArose is not certain where at home he will it put. Maybe in le umbrella sttand.

Oh yes, and if you happen in to in North Norway be mes amis, could you please Merriçe rescue?

Friday, 25 April 2008

A Drawing, by MAERRIYSE

Merrhise, he tihnks it most odd is that he strated writing his new novel after his visitors most weird arrived. It is almost like Mawruse, he was by them inspired. This, it is a notion most rediculous and Meruse he rejects it most sternly!

In any case mes amis, Merrhise he thought you might like this drawing he did of one of his wisitors:



Mawryse in deistress

Mes amis, Merrhuse is not having a good time. Alas, he is still in Norway with no hope of resuce marrooned with no hope of rescue.

But, mes amis, Merhuse he does not give up hope. No mes amis he keeps right on with his Great Wrok. MErrosse has on his next novel been working. Without the distractions of home to distract him, he has been making good progerss mes amis. He has already wrtittne 500 pages of pure gold, the best material he has ever written! Once again, a great geynius has suprassed himself!

Though MEariyssse is all alone by himself, he has had vistors, fear ye not mes amis! A few days ago, two men came up to where Mearise he was camped. One was thickset, muscular and very strong. he, he had red hair and red beard. He had a Hammer on his belt, and it did not look nice. Merise, he was intimitated, but he showed it not. The other man, he was even more worrying.He wore a broad brimmed hat, and a coat blue and a walking staff. He had long white hair, mes amis, and only wone eye. There were two ravens that seemed to belong to him. Merrhyse could not this understand.

Merrhyisle, he talked with thim about many things, including the high cost of stationary. At this point, the younger man he looked much agitated and said to the older man "all father, we have to go now". Then they left. Mmwerrhyese, he caleld after them "Hang on! I just remembered, mes amis, Mwerrhyhjse he is stranded and cannot get away! Can you help him escape?" But alas, the two wisitors most mysterious, they heard him not.

Oh well. Merrhyse, eh does not know who his vistors most estemed were. But he does know that he will be rescued, mes amis! It will happen!

Wednesday, 23 April 2008

Ratatoskr, if you are reading this mon ami, Merrhise he needs your help! Alas, he much cold is and also out of food is running. Mes amis, he is having to get by with foriaging for food.

Last night, he looked under a rock and found a roast pheasant. He under another rock also looked and found a chocolate cake. But, he is not certain how much longre he can this life of foraging and eating poor wild foods (the pheasent was slightly burned) keep up!

Ratatatoskr, Morise neeeds rescuing Much!

Saturday, 5 April 2008

Life in Norway, by Merise!

Mes amis, Merrhuyse he is much in luck! This mroning he under a tussock looked, and found several powerpoints mounted into the permafrost. Also, there was a phone and network socket. Also, he was able to his laptop plug in and internet access get. Mes amis, you are saved! The adoring audiense of Morrrise will not be deprived of his geynius most unique!

Alas, Mewrise himself is not yet saved. He still in the North of Norway is trapped. He is hopping that his Good Friend Ratatatatoskr will to the rescue come. Maybe Ratatoskr will a helicopter here fly up. Or maybe he will at the head of a train of reindeer arive. Still, Meruse he hopes that Ratatatosk here arrives very soon. Is cold, mes amis, is cold.

Luckily there was some cold weather gear in the Piper plane Merise he stole. Otherwise, Mawwrwise he would be in big trouble. Also, since the plane it did not explodinate Merrrise he is able to sheltere in it. Le plane Piper, she is too damamged to fly alas. But she can at least shetler to Mawrose the geynius offer!

Mes amsi,s have no doubt that Merosse he will get away from here. Once again very soon you will in Armidale in France see him mes amis!

Friday, 4 April 2008


So Maurice has got himself lost again, eh? Typical. And he expects Ratatoskr to get him out of it again, eh? Typical, again. I'm busy. Odin wants me to deliver a parcel for him. It's important, can't let the All-Father down again eh? No, not gonna happen. Can't help. Sorry, want to, hands are tied etc.

In the mean time, might just sit back and snigger. Can someone pass the acorns?

Yours squirrelishly,


Merrhise, 'is iphone batterie it is dying, mes amis! Le iPone it said "Bleeple!" at Mawrise. Naturally, Merise was not at this happy and demanded that it explain itself further. Then he noticed that the iphone, it had Low Battery Alert printed on its screen.

This is not good, mes amis. THe IpHONE is Maroses primary contact with the otuside world. How will he escape if his iphone, its battery is deadinated?

Ratatoskr, if you're reading this, please Marise help! HE promises he will not his slide show of his book tour force you to watch!


Saturday, 29 March 2008

Lost again, mes amis!

Catistrophe! MErrjhyse, he has again found himself lost, this time in the Frozen tundra of the north rather than a desserted tropical island most desserted.

But fist mes amis, how it came to happen. Merrhyse, eh went to the hairport to fly to fly from Riga to Oslo.

Agrandir le plan

Alas, mAwrise, he on the worng flight got. He got on a flight to Tromsø got!

Vis større kart

Alas, when he there arreived he was much distressed and agitated. They did not need to lock Merisse up though, that was an over reaction. I am certain the secuirty guard he will recover, and Maruose only broke a few luggage conveyer belts and some plate glass windows.

When Morise was released, he to the hairport made his way. Alas, eh could not on an hairyplane flight get at such short notice so he for a walk went. Soon, Meruse noticed a Piper and an idea had. He would it steal and fly himself to Oslo! Stealing is wrong of course, but all is excused for a geynius like Merrrryse in the service of his art!@!

Well, MErrhise he got into the lpane and flew southwards for hours and hours. After a while he the plane it out of fuel ran. Alas, he also noticed that he not southwards but north had been going! According to le GPS, merrhise is is 8km out of Nordkapp is.

Vis større kart

Merwuse, he knows not what to do. ALl he can do is wait here and hope he is rescued.

Hmmm... Mewrisse still has his hand luggage, with an iPhone and two satellite phones. Lets se... MErrhise can Just get a GSM signal get... He will try calling Ratatoskr on his iPhone if this it does not work he will on his Stattelite phone try Ratatatosk calling. Maybe Ratatatatosk will help. HE is in Norway, after all.

First though, he must a quick weblog post make on his iPhone. He cannot his public most adoring keep in suspense, after all!

MERRHYSE, blogging LIVE from the site of his PLANE CRASH, near NORDKAPP in NORWAEY!!!@!1!

Sunday, 23 March 2008

Not mentioning the last few radio interveiws

Greetigns mes amis! Another weblog post most magnifique from your old ami Merrhise da Perfossir, and not a moment too late!

Eh bien, Merrhose to the Ukraine got their safe. His stay it was most uneventful, mes amis. He sold three copies of his book most magnifique, and got out of his hotel just before the hotel it explodinated. Merose does not know why this it happened, but he is happy that he was not explodinated!

Then, Ratatatatatatoskr was kind enuogh to fly Mawrice on to Poland where he in Poland arrived early this morning. Mes amis, Merrhyse has in Poland a free day before a radio interview on nAtional radio this evening giving. MEruse hopes that it the interveiw in Croatia will go better than. Mawrruse does not want to the interview in Ukraine even think about Mes Amis.

After this, Mqwrise will to Latvia go. Alas, Ratatatatatatatatatatatosk cannot Meuriose to Latvia fly, Ratatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatoskr had to Norway to go back earlier today. He would not to Meriuse explain why this was.

Still, there is much more of the tour to go, and much excitement and much books to be sold and much money to be made doing so! Mawriusse looks forward to it alll alot!

Dont worry, mes amis, Mawruyse will keep you infromed!

Thursday, 20 March 2008


Greetings from Merhise, mes amis. Meruse is on his way now to Ukraine, for another itnreview and a nother book singning.

Meriçe, he tried to for his radio interview to prepare a lot but alas his Croatian it was still no good.

Still, Mes amis, at least the book singeing it went wery well. You shuold have been their, mon ami! THere were at least six poeple in the audience for Merhise his reading, mes amis.

The Bolivian ambassador to Croatia and his wife they were in attendance and both they both bought of Merißes book copies. Merrise, he is really going up in the wolrd now! He is in the right circles mixing, and their can be no stopping his sucess now! Maybe if he his cards plays right, he might to Bolivia be invvited!

Well, Merrhiçe will soon in Ukraine be arriving. he is being flown their by Ratatosk, who is Marise there flying in le helicopter de Ratatoskr. Meruse he hopes that Ratatoskr a good helicopter pilot is, and does not the melliflopter crash!

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

Mistake! Catistrophe!

Alas, Merrhyse has just realised that he in Croatia arrived a day earlie! This, it is not good. It also explains why Maruse, his interview on Craotian radio did not so well go. He was not there expected until this evening mes amis!

Also, he his book singeing in Albania missed. This is most tragique. Mewryse, he heard that well over five thousand people turnedd up to him there see. Eh bien, at least they copies of Mawrises book had -- they sold 11,000 copys of tEh Mouhtwash of the Gods! Merrhyse, he had only 3,000 copies singed in adwancve so many people they were disappointed.

Well, Meruse a book signg in Croatia tomorrow has to lok fowrard to. The book sellr, he told Meriçe that maybe as many as five (5!) poeple might turn up! Things are looking up, mes amis, things are looking up!

Monday, 17 March 2008

Got laptopp compttutor back again!

Mes amis, Merrhyse has his most grateful audience in the dark left for two long. It is not fair on my fans most devoted to be deprived of the wit and wisdom most gracious of Meruse for so long. Eh bien, the wait it is over.

Merise, he on Thursday left Rome to to Greece to travel. Alas, when he there got he went to his bag to his laptop comptutur new get out. Alas! It was there not. THere was a chameleon disguised as Merrhiçe's laptop most beauitful. This sniggered, and scuttled off and hid.

Luckily, Mariße was able to ring mon ami M Garamond, who was able to get the hotel which in ROme Merhase had staide in to the laptop FedEx ahead. It got to Croatia ahead of Merrhyse.

Mierrhiçe, he had an radio interview today in Croatia but that did not go well as Mirose he does not Croatian speak. HE is now in his hotel room. He would share a description of his view from the window or even a photo with his readers most devoted but alas Merrose cannot as it dark outside is.

Tuesday, 11 March 2008

En route to Rome

Well mes amis the book luanch at Milan went better than Merhyse had worried. Mawruse, he had worrie d that no one would to his book luanch most amazing want to come. But there was three, maybe even four people there! It was most incredible, the atmosphere it was electric as M Garamond introduced the Greatest Geynius, Dr Maurose de Parfosser.

When I my reading gave, the crowd was completley silent, mes amis, hanging on every word of Merise. They adored me, mon ami, they adored me! At least fifty per cent of the crowd came up afterwards to buy copies of the book ,and get tehm signed by Mewrrisse.

YOu may rememer Maurise had his suitcase in Paris left behind when he mistook a chameleon for his suit case. Well, mes amis, Merrhyse was able to much beutiufl clothes in Milan buy to replace the ones he has in Paryse forgotten. You should have seen him in Manutius's office! Merrhyse was the epitome of elegience.

The only thing which makes Meriçe sad now is that he the Leaning Tower did not in Milan find. Merrhyse, he would have so liked to visit this well known land mark! Maybe next time he will find it and get to visit it finally.

Eh bien, it is over now. MEs amis, I am on my way to Merrhises next signing, which this one is in Rome. Look forward to seeing you all there mes amis!

From MAWRYSE, blogging LIVE on the TRAINE to RHOME!

Sunday, 9 March 2008

Site seeing, at the Leaning Towerr

Mes amis Merrhyçe is having a day around Milan looking It is sightseeing most beautiful, in this city so scenic. Mœrysse, he is taken a break to sit down and a coffeee drink, and decided he must use his iPhone to post another entry to his readership most devoted on his weblog most magnifique.

Mon ami I am trying to find the cities landmark most famouss, the Leaning Tower but Merwhyse he can find it not. He M. Garamdond tried to ask where it is but he became much agitated and would not Merrhyse tell. It would Merrhises day most perfect make if he could it see, but alas he can it find not.

Maybe this pigeon will know where it is. Meirhyße will ask it.

Arrrived in Florence

Greetings mes amis from Mwerrhyse, currently blogging live in his hotel most splendide to which he has arrived in the city most lovely of Milan. Tomorrow, Marise he will luanch his new book The Mthwash of the Gods at the Milan offices of his publisher new, Manutius.

My publisher new, M. Garamond, is most kind. He has ordered the food and drnik for the partrty most splendide he has planned. He said he will me the bill send later.

Mes amis, the trip it has not been with out incident though. Merrhyse all his stuff packed into two bags -- a large bag for clothes and books, and a bag much smaller for carry on to plane. When he got to Milan, he the other bag realised was not right. The scaly texture, it was not just the wondeful luxury vinyl effect. Also, the bag it sniggered. It was that chameleon again! The real bag de Maurise is still in Paris. This got Merrhyse most upset and agitated. Still, the hairport security persons were most overreacting when Merrise just a few chairs, tables and windows and the luggage conveyor belt broke. They did not their guns have to pull on Merrhyse. Also they should not have got so upset when he merely tried to grab their guns and hit them repeatedly with their guns. What is wrong with that?

Still, this did not Merrhyse his baggage regain. So Mawrhyse had to go buy more expesnive good clothes for his book launch. He must for this look most splendid.

What Meruçe had in his carry on bag:
- A new MacBook computer
- His Apple iPhone
- HIs satellite telephones
- A copy of Foucault's Pendulum by Umbarto Eko
- A camerra digital
- A new calculator he himself bought, to calculate all the money Mewryçe will be on this tour making
- A fountaien pen

The MacBook, it is confusing. Even though Merryse in Parrhyse bought it, the software it is all in Breton. Merise cannot it understand. If it were in English or Franch he could it understand. But he cannot Breton understand!

Mawrhyse, he tried to change the language to Englsih. But the computer, it said "I'm sorry Dave, I can't let you do that." My name, it is not Dave! And for some raison I wanted to the computer ask to open the Pod Bay Doors. I know not even what these are! It is most mysterios, mon ami. Most mysteriious.

Mes amis, you should all lok forward to the book luanch tomorrow. Merrhyse, he cannott wait for this event most historique. It is a momentous event! I will see you all there mes amis!

From MAURYSE, blogging LIVE in MILANN!!

Friday, 7 March 2008

Maurice's schedule for the Book Signing Tour

Bonjour mes amis...

Fooled you, eh? Bet you thought that was Maurice. Not, it's me Ratatoskr!

Well, Maurice is OFF and on his grand tour of Europe now. He wanted me to let you all know his schedule. Here it is, folks:

From: Claudio Garamond [cgaramond@manutius-press.it]
To: Ratatoskr [ratatoskr.squirrel@gmail.com]
CC: Maurice de Perfossor
Subject: Maurice's schedule for the Book Signing Tour

Ratatoskr (and Maurice),

Here is the schedule for Maurice. This is as agreed on the phone with Maurice last week.

Fri 7 Mar 08:35 Fly EasyJet from Paris to Milan.
Mon 8 Mar 11:00 Meet myself at Manutius's offices. Then lunch
Mon 8 Mar 14:00 Book launch, reading and signing at Manutius' office.
Tue 9 Mar Travel to Rome
Wed 10 Mar Signing at Bookstore 'Credulone' in Rome at 10:00
Thu 11 Mar Travel to Greece
Thu 11 Mar Interview on 'Aristophanes Radio' at 18:00
Fri 12 Mar Signing at Bookstore 'Medea' in Athens at 10:32
Sat 13 Mar Free day in Athens
Sun 14 Mar Travel to Albania
Mon 15 Mar Signing at 'American Books' in Tirana at 14:00
Tue 16 Mar Travel to Croatia
Tue 16 Mar Interview on Croatian national radio at 20:00
Wed 17 Mar Signing at 'Not Really American Books' in Zagreb at 13:00
Thu 18 Mar Travel to Ukraine
Fri 19 Mar Interview on local radio at 08:00, Ukraine
Fri 19 Mar Signing at 'Borders Books' 14:00, Kiev
Sat 20 Mar Travel to Poland
Sun 21 Mar Free day in Poland
Sun 21 Mar Interview on national radio, Poland, at 22:00
Mon 22 Mar Book signing in Krakow Books, Warsaw
Tue 23 Mar Book singing in Warsaw Books, Krakow
Wed 24 Mar Travel to Latvia
Thu 25 Mar Book signing at 'Lost Books', Riga at 11:00
Fri 26 Mar Travel to Norway
Fri 26 Mar Interview on Radio Odin at 22:00.
Sat 27 Mar Signing at Thor Books in Oslo at 09:00
Sat 27 Mar Singing at Wodin Books in Bodø at 16:00
Sun 28 Mar Free day in Oslo
Mon 29 Mar Travel to Germany
Mon 29 Mar Intreview on Radio Schweinhund at 22:20
Tue 30 Mar Signing at Analphabetin Bücher in Hamburg at 11:00
Wed 31 Mar Signing at English Books in Munich (Bavaria) at 14:00
Thu 1 Apr Travel to Switzerland
Thu 1 Apr Interview on Schweizer Radio at 20:00
Fri 2 Apr Book singing at Schwachsinnige Bücher in Geneva at 11:00
Sat 3 Apr Free day in Geneva
Sun 3 Apr Free day in Geneva
Mon 4 Apr Travel to UK
Tue 5 Apr Interview on BBC Radio 4
Wed 6 Apr Signing at Why Books in Milton Keynes at 13:00
Thu 7 Apr Signing at Why Not Books, London SE30
Fri 8 Apr Return to France
Sat 9 Apr Interview on French radio at 11:00
Sat 9 Apr Signing at cafe on Rue Mouffetard, Paris
Sun 10 Apr Return to country house near Armidale, France for well earned rest!



Well, Maurice is gonna be one busy little bee for the next few weeks... Remember folks, plan your holidays so you're not in the same country as he is. If he's coming to your country, go away for a few days! Its worth it. Oh boy is it worth it!

Yours squirrelishly