Teh birthday praty of Mwerise.

As promised, mes amis, Miroçe is going to writinate abuot his brithday praty most magnificent taht he just recently has had.

OKAY, OKAY, a few things, they did not to plan go. Merise had inwited over 45,00 people, and only of them 10 turned up. This was not good. But teh ten taht did turn up includeded many of Merjoses bon amis, so tihs okay was. M. Burlosconi attended, as did M. Tony & M Cheri Blair. Also present was Mieroses aquaintance/asociate Âglie de St-Germaine.

Mirhjose , he had payed for a chef & cooks to preparinate teh food. Much as Mwerise is a geynius in teh kitchen, there was too too too much work for him. ESPECIALLY as it his brithday was , and he injoying himself was mean t to be, NOT cooking in teh kitchen. He did try to give teh chef teh benefit of his wisdom by constantly providing adwice on cooking, but teh chef oddly did not seem to tihs apreciatinate. Ewentually, he pointed out taht such tihngs were beneath teh geynius of Marośe. A point wiht witch Merice coud hardly disagreeinate!!!1!!?!

Eh bien. Teh diner, it was magnificent. As were teh whines, which Merose organdised himself. Tehse were ALL from teh 1963 wintage -- same as Morise!!1! Thats right mes amis -- Moerise turned 43 tihs year!!1!~! Moarose particularly like teh Krug 1963, as well as teh Romanee-Conti 1963. Aglie preferianted teh Lafite-Rotschild 1963.

Eh bien. DId Maorŵse mention taht the dinner, it most magnifique was????!?@!? Eh bien,. it was.

Here are a sample of some of teh many, many courses, prowided by teh chef. Apologies for teh bad spelling, teh chef is not a geynius.

• Wild salmon with teriyaki sauce, served with oyster mushrooms and sautéed bok-choy and sprinkled with caramalised Macadamia nuts
• Carpaccio of beef with baby betroot and a salad of oranges and rocket, and a dijon mustard dressing
• Battered whiting served with a homemade aioli and kiplfer potatoes
• Duck, braised in sherry, served with wild mushrooms, aubergine puree, young leeks, and crème fraiche
• Slow-cooked pork loin, caramelised and served with hazelnut paste, sautéed cep mushrooms, caramlised parsnips and crème fraiche

Eh bien, mes amis... you get teh picture. It is not as good as teh cooking of Mwerise (WHo after all is a geynius in teh kitchen) but it wery, wery good was. In fact, it was magnifique,. Aglie raved abuot teh venison with juniper and stilton sauce, aparently he thuohgt it much good was,. Mwerise, being MUCTH more sophisticated, was not impressed.

The praty it started wiht lunch at just before mid-day & did not finnish until 8 A.M. teh next mornign. Magnifique!!!1! ANd then many of teh guests stayed for brakefast. Tehn lunch. Many did not leave until teh 3rd -- 3 DAYS AFTER, mes amis.

And Moárose, he loved evry minute of it. He will postinate more abuot his presents wery soon.

BUT FIRST, as raeders of Merice his TWITTER FEED will know, Mjerise has been offerinated a job by his publisher, teh esteemed press Manutius, to edit a series of books called "ESOTERIC HISTORY". Tehse will cover teh Templars, Rosicrucians and other littel-known bits of history. Merose is even contemplating writing one himslef... on neolithic spacecraft... a return to teh subject on witch he did his PHD.