Le Monde de Maurice

A exciting discovery at Castello Muerhise di Umbria... Roman Whine

2012-01-12T07:08:00.001+01:00

Mes amis... Maorhose was inwestigatinating some of teh cellars at his castel here in Umbria... and he found sometihng wery exciting! A faslse wall! Tahts right! A false wall! Mweroce knew it something must be hiding, so it wery carefully demolishinated.

After collecting up all teh rubble taht had fallen on top of Morose (Stupid masonary, it knows not what a grate geynius Meerhose is!!1!!?!?_) he walked into tihs sekret hidden room. And he it a whine cellar found out it to be. An ANCEINT wine cellar. Thats right, teh whines were all ROMAN. Mostly from teh wery, wery celebrated wintage of 121BC, too , mes amis. Tehre many amphorae of whines are, and Morhose of cuorse could not waitinate to tehm taste. Muarhose was of cuorse particularly excited abuot teh Falernian wine , biut tehre also was Alban wine and Caecuban_wine. He much excited was .

MES amis. It took GREAT EFFORT, even for a geynius such as Moarhose, to not open all teh amphorae and drink them all & then & there &. BUT some-how , , Mourhase himself restrained. He a wery special evening planed, & inwited many of his tres bon amis, includinating his oldest Ami, Aglié. Tihs dinner, it was scheduled for TUESDAY 11HT JANUARY. Tahts rite, mes amis, taht was YESTREDAY.

Eh bien. It magnifique was. Especialy wiht Moarhoses cookinating most magnifique. His escargot wehre particularly popular.

And teh wines!! Muahrose broughted out his best Riedel glasses, whihc not wery auhtentically Roman was, but was magnifique nonetehless. Aglei was particularicularly enthusiastic about teh 121BC Falernian ' austerum '. Maurhose agreed taht tihs was magnifique, but preferinated teh 121BC Caecuban. It magnifique was, and complemented teh roast partridge taht wiht it Muarhose had served.

Mes amis... tehre were many many amphoerae of these, so luckily Muahrose more for anohter day has. May be next thyme he will compare it wiht teh 809BC Caves des Templiers Hermitage , which he also still a few remaining amphorae of has.

Eh bien... taht is all for now. MAY BE, mes amis, Moarhose will postinate abuout his NEW YEARS EVE praty some time real soon. It magnifique was. Yes, maybe he will. Even thuough he slightly maybe might have promised Aĝlie to keep it all sekret might ahve.

Mwarose in Rhome

2011-12-07T08:15:00.001+01:00

Mes amis... Muarhose was finding teh wine making quite boring. Such tedium, it is below teh level of a geynius such as Morose. SO he decided to departinate for his apratment in Rhôme. Wise move, mes amis, wery sneaky... Aglíe didn;t seee TAHT one coming... oh noes, mon amis, he did not.

So far... so good... teh only porblem is taht Aglŷ had a nother trick up his sleeve. When he raelised taht Morice had runninated away --- he did too!! Tihs is not fare, mes amis, not good. Whilst it is okay for a geynius of Moarhwse's stature to make tricks like taht it is NOT ok for a non-geynius such as Aglei.

Morise was wery adgitated when he this heard... so he will now have to buy a new bedside lamp, as he may have slightly thrown his prewious one at teh wall in a fit of anger.

BUT,, mes amis, teh basic porblem remaininates. How to get teh wines from Castello Morise releasinated? He has teh wintage 2009 whines all botteled now & ready to sell. And teh 2011 wintage whines are in tanks (NO, mes amis, not teh sort wiht guns taht you drive around in... teh boring type, teh large metal containiainers taht you fermentinate wine in...).

Mwrojse was kind of sort of maybe slightly relying on Aglie to do tihs for Marose. BUT now Aglei has stormed off in a huff AGAIN. And Morose, he is sure what to do not.

Eh bien, It can Wait. Marose will returninate to it WERY WERY SOON. Maybe in teh new year.

In teh mean-time, Mjeroçe ahs decidinated to spend Christmas in his castel in Umbria. Shuold be good, mes amis, should be wery good.

WHine-making @ castello di mëerhise, castello romana

2011-12-01T07:34:00.001+01:00

Mes amis... as some of you might ahve noticed, two tihngs have hapened recently:

Muarhose has gotted in contact once again whiht his non-geynius friend Aglie
Mierhiçe ahs gone to his castel in castello romani wiht Aglei, to make Maurhoses famuos wines. And bottel teh wines from 2009.

Moerhose has been finding tihs much tedius. It means taht he in his Castelli-Romani castel for several weeks has had to be. This much trying for Muerhose is. He does not to in one place for more than 8 days at a time be. Luckily, tihs is not normally hard, as he so many hosues has. But at teh moment, he here must stay. NOT GOOD MES AMIS.

Also, Algiê has been bohtering Muarhose wiht Many triviliaties taht are below a grate mind such as Morose. Although teh wines are Merhises' , and he responsible for all teh important whine making is , he expectinated tah Aglŷ would get on wiht teh TRIVIAL day--to--day stuff taht concerns Muarose not. And yet, he insistinates taht Morhoose must help wiht tihs!! IT's all, Morhise, just help operate tihs pump, Muarhose, help fill tihs barrel. Wahtever. Morhose cares not.

And Aglei is still tryinating to find teh Templar map he tihnks Marhose has. It too tedious is. Maybe Muarhose will ahve to finally admitinate taht he doesn;t ahve it.... but tehn.... may be Aglei would stop being Marhoses freind, & stop helping with teh cooking, winemaking, & cleaning. Hm... so. Bad idea. Moarhose tihnks he will keep queit about tihs one for now.

But teh tediousiousness is for Marhose to much getting. He is planninating to escape to his Rhôme apratment rael soon mes amis... wahtch tihs space.

Teh wines of Marhoses many estates,,,, and meeting AGLIE again

2011-11-03T05:28:00.002+01:00

Oh noes... Mycroft, Moarhose's non-geynius brohter, just ranginated to remind Merice taht he has yet to harvest his wineyard in both his Italian and Spainish estates... Oh noes! Waht to do? Muarhose wonderinates if it is too late to teh harvest saveinate.

Muarrhose also grudgingly rembers taht last thyme he made whine (in 2009, Muarrhose compeletely forgotted about teh vintage in 2010) Agliey also a bit helpeded out. And , in a co-incedence , Uglié been getting back in contact wiht Moarose, wiht some storie about a nother Templar castel he wants help inwestigatinating. Mewrhyce had him a round for dinner on teh 31st, and it much well went.

So... Muarise is tihnking taht MAY BE, just MAY BE , he could get Agliê to help out wiht rescuing Morrhoesses whine harvest agian. Muarrhose will go to Italy first, tehn Spain. Tehn we can wisit tihs TEMPLAR CASTEL of Uglíe's. Mirhise hopes it good is. It better be.

Oh noes. Moarhose also rembered taht he still has teh whines he made in Italy in 2009 in barrel, redy to be bottled. He just forgotted to bottel tehm & sell tehm. May be Âglíè can wiht thihs also helpinate... hm... May be it was a spot of good luck taht he back in contact wiht Morhose got. Even thuogh tehy did not on good terms part.

Eh bien. Taht not wery "positive tihnking" is. And Morose, he likes to remain positive, focussed, calm & IN CONTROL. Tihs is much easy for him. He just has to remindinate himslef taht he teh gratest geynius in teh universe is, and tehn he much better feelinates. Tehre, its working already.

Eh bien., Teh dinner for Agly teh other day wented wery wery well. Morise took teh adwise of his brohter Mycroft, even thouhg he a lesser mind tahn Maeruse is, and did not server wegimite sandwitches for Aglie. Instaed, he made a wery nice meal wiht roast beef wiht a port reduction sauce. He even made an entree and a dessert!!!1! Of course, tehre many great whines were, including a '47 Cheval Blanc, taht one of Âgly's favourites is.

And Marhose is shure taht his trip wiht Aglei will go wery well, even though these trips never have prevwiously. This time will be diferentt. Muarhoise is shure it is. He has a wery good feeling abuot it.

Maurice in Canberra - a horrifying prospect

2011-10-31T22:40:00.000+01:00

I got back home from work early -- i.e., at 10pm -- and reheated some Boeuf Bourguignonne for dinner. Julia keeps inviting herself round for dinner, but managed to avoid it this evening. Yes, I know you haven't found somewhere to rent yet. Yes, I know I have a spare room. And your point was?

Got a phone call from Maurice. As is typical of Maurice, it was somewhat long and incoherent. The main point was that he's planning to visit Canberra when he's next in Australia.

Suddenly having somebody else over to stay, and thus the spare room occupied, seems like a better idea.

For those who can't remember his last visit, here is an artist's interpretation of what a visit from Maurice would look like:

It's not very realistic, I admit.

In reality, its far worse.

I'll send Julia a text messsage.

The return of Mycroft (from 20,000 fathoms)

2011-10-30T03:08:00.000+01:00

Mes amis.... no, fear not, its not Maurice, its me, Mycroft. It's safe to come out from hiding now...

Not much blogging recently as have been organising... stuff... to do with the commonwealth heads of government meeting in Perth. Can't really comment on that at this moment, or indeed at any other moment. Some things will just have to stay opaque.

But the main point here is that this hasn't left me much leisure to do internetting... or much else indeed. And I've been in Perth -- away from my humble abode in Canberra, my library, my cellar...

But back in Canberra now. Maurice-free since December 2010! Quite an achievement. I'm proud, in any case.

I bought plenty of wine in Burgundy ... you might all remember my trip there earlier in the year ... and that was arriving back in dribs and drabs by surface mail for months afterwards. But I got some good stuff ... '55 Clos Vougeot? I bought several magnums. I also got a few nice bottles of a '78 Vosne-Romanée 1er Cru ... yummy.

But Julia said I should stop boasting about my wine cellar, so that's it for now (though I think that's because she's secretly envious ... and because I wouldn't open my last bottle of '34 Romanée-Conti for her ... but we'll pass over that in silence. What cannot be said here will not be spoken of!)

I'm starting to make plans for 2012. A trip to Italy is a must. Lots of trips to the US, but that's not personal, it's business. No, again, I can't speak of that here. I'm also debating starting on a scholarly autobiography ... 'Life and times of an intellectual civil servant', but probably wouldn't get clearance to publish it. Eh ...

Back to the present -- seems Maurice (my 'geynius' brother) has forgotten the grape harvest at his Italian and Spanish estates. How long should we wait till we remind him? Just need to wait long enough for the vintage to be an almost irreparable disaster ... so any day now?

Muarhoses ill-fated road trip to Boirdeaiux., Switzerland

2011-10-29T06:59:00.003+02:00

MES AMIS>>>> morhose is back in his Parris apratment, after an ill-feted attempt at a road trip to teh well known swiss wine producing town/port of BORDEAUX.

Unfrotunately, tihngs went badly right from teh start. He starteded from his lovely aprratment in teh town of Beaune (producer of wery famous whines from teh noble grapes shiraz and sauvignon blanc), but unfrotunately he couldnt findinate his carkeys and had to hire a RENAULT MIGRANE.

Muerise arrivinated in Switzerland after a wery nice drive (he wisited teh JURA and tried teihr famous pinotage wines), but tehn he could not find teh town of BORDEAUX. Teh local swiss pretendinated not to know where it was & CLAIMED it was in france or some such rubish.

Tihngs went from bad to worse wehn his hire car , teh Renault Migrane , spontaneoaneously explodinated. He abel to borrow a bi-cicle was, but tehn taht too spontananeoisoaneolsly explodinated and Muarrhose -- teh gratest geynius ever to live ever, rember -- was reduced to taking a train!!!1!!!

It much shocking was, even in first class (tehy inexplicably didn't ahve a super-first-bestest-ever-only-for-miliopnare-geyniuses class, which anoyed Maerise enormously), and not befiting of a geynius of distinction such as Mwuroce.. Muarhoise is still traumatised.,

Eh bien. Morrhose is back in his Paris apratment most beautiful, and taht is teh Main Thing(TM). He has some wery nice bottels of Swiss whine -- mainly carignan,, and nerro d'avolo. He looks forward to ahving tohse over teh next few weeks, with his diner. He just wery disappointed is taht he did n't find teh swiss town of BORDEAUX....

ROAD TRIP PLANNINATED MES AMIS

2011-09-24T18:42:00.000+02:00

Mes amis... tihs is tres exciting... Morrhose has been in his apratment in Beaun for a few days/months/weeeks/years/centruries/milleniea (Wahtever, Merisse lost track of teh time and isnt really sure), and has raelly enjoyinated his stay. BUT now he has sometihng even more excinating planed... a ROAD TRIP

Tahts right, mes amis, you heard corectly, a ROAD TRIP.

He plans to drivinate to Bordeaux in Switzerland via teh Jura. He will postinate updates on TWITER wehn he can, and frequent wobleg updates.

There only one problem is... he cant findinate his car keys, he has tehm lost. He was shure tehy were in his jacket pocket... and yet, tehy are not! Miaerwse knows only one solution to tihs problem... BUYINAYE A NEW CAR. Expensive, but nohitng else works. He will talkinate to his local JAGUAR daeler tihs wekk. And tehn, keep tuned, mes amis. excitement awaits....

Muarhise in burgundy....

2011-09-07T16:52:00.000+02:00

Mes amis.... Murhose is in his new apratment in Burgundy.

Actually, he lies, he isnt. He in an intrenet cafe is. Teh internet at his apratment, it works not. Some one (e.g., his brohter, Mycroft) has stolenated teh A.D.S.L. MODEM from Morhise his apratment... so he teh intrenet tehre use cannot. Tres annoying.

AND YET, Morrhose enjoyinating being in Burgundy is. Teh wineyards are wery difficult to find (a Templar conspiracy, Maerhoce is sure) and yet, yesterday he managed to find one! It wery exciting was. Mieeorohse celebrated wiht a glass or three of teh local SHIRAZ wine....

Tomorrow , Morrhose will dirvinate to teh NEARBY WILLAGE of GEVREY-CHAMBERTIN to see if he can see any wineyards tehre... and if he can any whine for his cellar buyinate tehre... Wish Morose luck, mes amis...

Mwaurhise in Sidney

2011-08-12T02:55:00.000+02:00

MES AMIS...

taht it winter in Australie is came as a shock to Mjurise. He had managed to forgetted taht winter in Australie is at teh time when it summer in France is, and winter in France the same time as winter in Australie is... Mirhoise thinks, thuogh he might have got taht confusinated.

Morrose wonders what season it is in Argentina., He will ahve to ring his estancia manager & find out. He will reportinate back on TWITTER.

Eh bien, Moruwse he has been survivinating teh winter. He fuond taht his apratment has perfectly good central heating, so he didnot have to make himslef an "improwised" open fireplace in his apratment. Even though this magnifique would ahve been.

Moirrhwse has made it his target to wisit many of Sidneys best restorrants tihs winter, and has enjoyed dinner many thymes at Sidneys Most Prestiginoiouis wenues such as Tetsuyas and Rockpool Bar & Grill. At teh Roockpool Bar & Grill he was abel to order teh 1945 Romanee-Conti taht he had twitted about on tweeter. AND, in-deed, it magnifique was. Morrhose drankj teh whine wiht teh wood fired grilled pigeon with roasted red peppers, grapes and radiccio salad. Also magnifique.

Eh bien. He much more tahn just eating in Sidney up to has been.

No, no, no, mon amis.

Far from it. He has been workinating on his next grate work of grate geynius -- an academic study of transistor radios in prehistoric Polynesia. He cannnot much here say (as rival academemics who are not as grate geyniuses as Morrhose scower this wobleg for ideas of geynius to rip oifff & steal from him), but it will be publishinated later in teh year.

He also porrf-reading a manuscript of his latest novwel. It magnifique will be!!!

Winter in Sidney...

2011-07-16T15:15:00.001+02:00

MES AMIS... tihs is a wobleg post much delayed... Muarrhose has pormised his fans most devoted taht he would woblegginate wery soon... and yet, it happened not.

Eh bien. Merose, he now in Sidney, NSW, Australie now is. He enjoyinating being in his nice littel apratment here is, though he not enjoying teh cold winter weather is. But he had QUITE teh adwenture getting to Sidney... he many wrong turnings took wehn dirving from Paris, NSW, Australie (A) to Sidney, NSW, Australie (H). HEre is teh route he tooked:

View Larger Map

Eh bien, it a long trip was. And, Morrhose wonce again had a run-in wiht teh flesh-eating Lesser Spotted Poison Fanged Kangaroo (Macropus venenum) once again. And, once agian, they tried to eat Mwrose. BUT ... luckily Merose a wery, wery fast car was dirvinating, so he able to escape wiht only minor damage to teh car (Tooth Marks, mes amis, Tooth Marks....). Teh less said, teh better.

EH BIEN.. Tihs cold, it is not agreeinating wiht Maerise. Non, mon ami, he is thinking whistfully of his chateau in Provence.... wehre it will be summer, and tehrefore Nice and Warm.

(ALSO, it is NEAR teh TOWN of NICE...,.., a good pun, is it not, mes amis???)

A bientot.

MOROSE.

Mycroft in Burgundy: Hello Folks!

2011-07-03T10:21:00.000+02:00

Greetings, mon amis...

No, fear not, it is not Maurice. It is I, Mycroft. You remember, Maurice's more intelligent brother? Facebook friends might remember that I was about to head off to France for a holiday. Well, luckily, I got out of Canberra before the volcanic ash did it worst (at last, I found something more disruptive and annoying than Maurice! Okay, maybe not) -- I left on the 14th June.

Also, luckily, I managed to get more than the two weeks leave I'd hoped for originally, I got three and a half weeks! I expect Australia will be in economic ruins by the time I get back... the PM's office (and therefore the rest of the country) can't function for half an hour without me, it seems... let alone nearly a month.

Anyway. Back on topic. I arrived in Beaune expecting to find that the "apratment" Maurice had bought here in Beaune to be a virtual ruin.

We all know how gullible Maurice is, and he bought it sight-unseen.

But no! Miraculous! It really is a rather elegant apartment, right in the centre of the old town, with three bedrooms... and a study... and a rather nice kitchen. And Maurice paid to have the Eurocave wine fridge stocked with good burgundy... and that happened too (amazing! Maurice making canny decisions -- must be coincidence!). Just drinking a good bottle of Montrachet now.

Well, its been a good holiday so far. Brought my work mobile with me, which was my one mistake. Of course, I've kept getting work-related phone calls at all hours of the day. I'm maliciously gleeful thinking about the phone bills they're racking up ringing me here... they pay for that phone, so they'll be paying all the lovely, juicy roaming fees. If Australia goes bankrupt and enters another recession in a month or so, you'll know why... heh.

Made a pilgrimage to the Romanée-Conti vineyard yesterday, and sat on the vineyard wall drinking a bottle of '96 Romanée-Conti. A rare privilege indeed! Even remembered to bring some a bit of a picnic to nibble on too... magnifique. Would def. recommend. And my mobile didn't go off once for the whole meal. Rumours that I had "accidentally" turned if off are all biased and unreliable (though accurate).

Visiting Chateau de Pommard tomorrow... the brochure makes it look very nice. Wondering if I can con Maurice into buying it for me as a holiday bolt-hole (would only be fair, to make up for all those bottles of '59 Haut-Brion and '47 Cheval Blanc of mine he drank).

That's enough for now, mes amis... a mid-morning walk beckons. Then lunch.

Muarhoces magnifique trip to Sidney -- teh PLANNING.

2011-06-08T05:15:00.002+02:00

Mes amis... Morrhose is planninating a trip to Sudney... he is JUST even now packinating teh car.

You might not rember, mes amis, but just last yaer Maeryuse property in Sidney boughted. And he to taht property (an apratment, right on Sidney harbuor, mes amis!!) has not recently wisited. SO he now a trip tehre plans. He has booked meals at teh bestest restaurants in Sidney, so it MAGNIFIQUE will be.

HMMM... he just raelised has.. he has a SELECTION of cars wiht him here in Paris, NSW:

A Toyota Hilux Pick - Up Trukc
a Porsche Cayenne Turbo S SUV, taht can at 275km/h drivinate
a HSV Maloo Pick - Up Truck taht can at 271.444km/h driveinate

Tehse all nice cars are, but tehy are all 4WHEELDROVE cars... and Murrhose is certain taht NOBODY but NOBIDY in Sidney would drive a 4WHEELDROVE car, especially not a 4WEEHLDROVE pickup truck!!!1! It too rural for a sofisticated city as Sidney would be. Tihs is why he bought himslef some new cars when he his new Sidney hosue first boughted:

a Jaguar XKR 2 door 2 seater sports car
a Maserati Quattroporte Sport GTS wiht Paddle Shif Gear Box 4 door 4 seater luxury car

... but alas he tehse in Sidney still left from LAST thyme he was tehre. So? WHAT CAR TO DIRVE TO SIDNEY???

Muarhese selects teh Porsche Cayenne tihs time. It teh fastest car is, and it looks a BIT more sofphisticated tahn the others... ALMOST (but NOT QUITE) sophisticated enough for sidney.

Eh bien, Morrhos is excited abuot his Sidney trip. He must finish packinating teh car wiht every thing he can of think, and also make certain that tehre is enough coffe for teh in-car espresso machine. Tehn he must have lunch. Tehn, he must drive!!! HE plans to stay on a speed of AT LEAST 270km/h for teh whole trip. Tihs means teh trip shuold take NO MORE tahn 1.95 hours... wihs Mwhrise luck!!

Return of Muaarhose to TWYTTER... and WOBLEGGING,,

2011-05-25T04:28:00.001+02:00

MES AMIS... it almost a month since Morhose twittered or woblegged has... he shure his adoring fans most adoring where wery sad to not benefit from teh geynius taht is Moarhose for tihs LONG period of time...

Teh sorry truht is taht, after he got back to Australie., Miruse raelsied taht he had lost his precious MOLESKIN(TM) note-book... which maent taht he did not ahve teh unlock code for his IpHONE as it was writen in teh notebook... which maent he could not get teh password for his MACBOOK PRO laptop comptutor as it was saved on his iPHONE... which maent he COULD NOT retreave teh password for his twyytter, facebook, blogger or E-lectronic Mail accounts as tehy were saved on his comptutor... he devistated was!! He spent weeks searching everywhere, all through his hosue, and his hairyplanes, and his car,s,, but tehn, by a miracle, yesterday he found it in teh pocket of teh jacket he had been wearing ALL ALONG!! Amazing. Muerhose, he much plæsed was...

Eh bien, Morhose just glad taht now he his MOLESKIN(TM) notebook has he can use his IpHONE and his laptop again,,, and can comunicate wiht his loyal fans wonce again... He also glad to be back in Australie is., though he much puzled by teh weather is. It's COLD here, almost like winter... yet wehn he left Paris, he certain it spring was... so shurely it should also spring in Australie be... odd, mes amis, odd.

Eh bien. Moreose will post more about his triumphant retturn to Australie soon. And Myrcroft has just left to wisit Beaune in France so expect a guessed weblog post from him sooon.

A bientôt!!

Mjuerise in Argentinina (again).

2011-04-26T04:58:00.000+02:00

Mes amis... you catch up wiht Maurise just as he abuot to leave Argentintinttna is... he just finished packinating his stuff in to his hairyplane has, and tehn will flyinate back to Australie/... thats righte, even as he tihs rights he is in teh cockpit sitting, makeing teh final preparations for teh flight,

Eh bien, Muarhise arivinated in Argentina ten (10) days ago... and since tehn has been relaxing & restinating... mostly... he also had some light INDUSTRIAL ESPOINAGE to do !!!1!!!?!?!!! Taht's rite... Muarise!! Inwolvinated in INDUSTRIAL ESPIOINAGE!!!1! Tres exciting, mes amis... Muarhiise went wiht teh estate manager of his Argentinain ranch to several wineries in Mendoza to findinate out all tehir whine-making practices/secrets... and tehy just let us in to their "TASTING ROAMS"! Incroidable!!

Morose and his wine-yard manager were abel to taste teh wine and even look in trhough teh door at teh whineries... Tehy even passed overy very sekrit infromation abuot teh wine making process when Muarhis asked tehm questions (for example, taht whine barrels are made from OAK!! WHO KNEW??!?!). Tihs was incredible, it would be like teh Templars inviting in Tourist and telling tehm all about their plans for World DOminaition (Teh Templars plans, taht is, not teh Tourists palns.)_ Incroidable!!!

Eh bien, he much ideas for his NEW argentininan whine now has ... he will reportinate back soon. But for now, he must head his head home for Australie... he is looking for ward to seeing PARIS NSW AUSTRALIA again wery wery soon... a bientot mes amis....

Even grate geyniuses MINOR mistaeks make WERY OCCAISIONALY

2011-04-02T04:32:00.003+02:00

AS noted earlier on twitter... even such a grate geynie as Muarhise mistakes makes. ON TIHS ocaision, teh wery wery minor mistaek taht Morhose made was taht wehn he flew from Argentina to Paris, he forgotted taht he had flown to Argentina in his own hairyplane, and taht this he ahd in Argentina lefted. SO instaed of resting & Relaxin g in Paris... he must back to Argentina fly to it pick up so he can to Australialialialial flyinate...

Eh bien, even such a grate geynius as Morisse must whith tehse FRUSTRATING ANNOYANCES put up. He is sure taht some how it is teh fault of Muarise his non-geynius Brohter Mycroft is... yes... taht sounds rite... it was ALL mycrofts fault. yet aigain./

... arrived in Parrhys, mes amis

2011-03-31T09:21:00.001+02:00

MES AMIS!!!1!! Murrhose, taht grate geynius, taht intellectual behemoth, ahs finally arrivinated in his Favuorite City, Parrhys, France (not to be confusinated wiht Parys, Australia!!). Eh bien, teh flight it much an adwenture was... he from Argentina set off on teh 18th March set off. ANd tehn, he finally arrivinated TODAY on teh 31 March.... a whole 23 days later!!1!

Eh bien, teh flight it not as mutch of an ordeal for Myarhose was as it might ahve been for a lesser mind, as Moorhose a grate geynius is. He had broughted much in his "CARRY ON" luggage.

In Mouarhoses luggage, as well as a parachute (which has served him well before now...), he had 331 booeks to read, his laptop comptutor, his GSM mobile phones, his satellite phones, 42 bottels of 1996 Bollinger le Grande Annee, and 14 kg of CAVIAR. Enough to keep Any Body happy....

Still... after tihs wery, wery long trip Mereise his "travel lust" has been satedede " recently... he pormises himslef taht he will not do any more travelling for AT LEAST 5 days., wehn he will be travellinating to Australie again. But for now, he has time to rest&relaxinate.

He much glad to be back in his humble apratment in Paris France is. He is EVEN NOW enjoyinating siting around in a cafe near his apratment enjoyinating espresso... mmm... espressso!! Muarhose is much happy to be back in Parhise.

Well.. Meruse would Love to stay aruond and more writtinate... but he a Booking at Restaurant le Meurice tihs evening, and he MUST go back to his apratment now to get raedy. More soon, mes amis!!!1!!

First GUEST POST -- a brief note from Mycroft.

2011-03-13T13:00:00.001+01:00

Good evening all. I hope you're sitting comfortably? Good, then I'll begin...

Long, long ago there was a genius and his non-genius brother. They both lived in the town of Armidale, NSW, Australia. Need I continue? Needless to say, Maurice thinks he was the genius one. We know better... (Also, for some totally bizarre reason he refers to Armidale, NSW as "Paris, NSW"... and hallucinates that he is French...)

Anyway. Back to the current. It seems Maurice has forgiven me all those times he somehow noticed that he was not the most intelligent brother... or the fact that it was me that became Genius-in-chief at the Department of the Prime Minister & Cabinet... Not that he'd have been up to the rigors of government, or been able to bring himself to the mundane "non-geynius" boredom of going to the same job all day every day...

Also not sure a re-union with my long-lost so-called "geynius" brother was what I'd wanted. Especially when he continually invites himself over to my place. Nothing better than to get back at 10pm after a hard day at the office, arguing with the PM about national security (again), and find Maurice has let himself into the wine cellar and is working his way through his third bottle of '59 Haut Brion... again.

Then he wants to ask me about what I did that day. Told him it was classified. He promises not to post it on the blog... but I see he's twittering everything even as we speak... What to do?

Still, he's given me the keys to the "wobleg" now... will be sure to post MY take on what he's up to... should be very interesting... stay tuned.

Welcome, Mycroft. Seriously.

2011-03-09T08:58:00.003+01:00

Welcome, Mycroft. Seriously.

Right, now we have the lame puns out of the way... was glad to hear that Mycroft de Perfossor, Maurice's younger, more intelligent brother, will be posting "guest posts" on the weblog.

Oh boy. And I said Maurice had messed-up big time when he allowed ME to do this. Oh boy, oh boy. And now he's let Mycroft in on it, eh? Well, expect some interesting weblog posts coming up on the true genius of Maurice. Will be interesting reading....

Yours nuttily,
Ratatoskr.

GUEST POSTS... by Mycroft... coming RAEL SOON NOW

2011-03-09T05:55:00.000+01:00

Mes amis... it is true. Maurise his non-geynius brohter has agreeinated to do a series of "GUEST WOBLEG POSTS" to Morhese his humble little wobleg (acutally, Miuarose his little joke... it actually teh gratest wobleg on teh intergoogle is, full of teh geynius of Moarose..)

Muarhose is sure taht all his raeders are as excited about this as he is. A new perspective on teh genius of Muarowse!!1! WHo could for anything more askinate?!?!?

Dinner at teh estancia

2011-03-08T23:59:00.000+01:00

Mes amis... dinner tonight was roast venison with blackberry and juniper sauce. Since Morose he could not decidinate which whine to have, he HAD BOTH, teh '84 Henschke Hill of Grace AND '96 Domiane Leroy Pommard Les Vignots. You may all tihnk taht taht sounds like a dinner most magnifique... but....

it is NOTHING, NOTHING mes amis,, in comparison to teh banquet Morause has planneded for tihs Sunday evening,, wehn he will inwite a few local neighbours for a dinner most magnifique, before he back to Buenoes Aires heads. No, it is no use pleading... Murohse cannot any more guests accomodatinate.

All he will say for now is taht teh diner will include:

12 courses, including venison, pheasant, fois gras, caviar...
29 different whines
5 first growht Bordauxs
6 grand cru burgundies
for after,,, Mearise his FAMUOS macarons and coffee.

Eh bien. Murhose must get back to it planning. And he must ring Ratatoskr back to discuss some wery improtant busines taht has come up in his home town of Paris NSW Australie. MORE SOON MES AMIS.

A raelisation most terrible...

2011-03-02T03:34:00.008+01:00

MES AMIS... Muirhyuse was just tukced up in his cozy bed in his cozy room in his cozy estancia estate house... wehn he woke up suddenly... even though it, it teh middel of teh night is.

Tahts correct, mes amis, Muarhise a REALISATION MOST TERRIBLE had.

But waht cuold upset a geynisu of such stature? WELL, mes amis, if you teh wobleg have been following closely (and he sure you is, he is sure you are hanging on teh every word of geynius taht comes from Muarise like water from a spring), tehn you will ahve noticeded taht he is in teh middle of planing a new wineyard for his Argentinian estate. Tihs is good.

Teh BAD raelisation is...

he already has TWO wineayrds. One in Italy, and another in France.

In Italy, he whine made in 2009, which Aglie subsequently blended and prepared for bottling. HOWEVER, Murrhose not only forgotted to teh whine bottle and sell, he completely forgtot abuot teh wintage in Autumn 2010.

In Spain, he NEVER whine has made, he keeps forgetting. He presumes taht teh grapes have rotted on teh vine and teh locals ahve not picked them in the dead of night whilst Mueriese he there was not and in to whine themselves made, as he asked tehm and tehy said NO.

OH NOES!! Waht a tragedy!! The world has been deprevid of teh GEYNIUS whines of Murrhose... but he wont forget tihs year, oh noes.

Eh bien. Enough. Murose needs a good nights sleep so he can put in a full days geniusing tomorow,. Bon nuit, mon amis!!

Mirrhose in his Argentininan country estate

2011-03-01T09:44:00.001+01:00

Mes amis Morrhose is enjoying at his estancia ("countery estate" in argentinian) in Argentina being. He a much good time is having.,

Eh bien, he ment to wobleg abuot this much, much earlier... but alas!! His most magnifique MacBook Pro it has recently deaded! So he not abel to access email, twitter or his wobleg has been able to be. He just today mangeged to borrow tihs computer of his estate manager but he still canot figure out how to twitter onto log on from tihs comptutor.

Eh bien. He discussinating planting a wineyard here has been. His estate manager NOT a geynius is, though, and keeps bogging Merese down in petty triviallities. Marose had an AMAZING idea to plant a pinot noir wineyard in teh middel of teh river, but teh estate manager claimed taht "you cannot plant a wineyard in water, it has to be in soil, on solid ground". RUbbish! But Murrhose must wiht him go along, just tihs once. So taht he agrees to plant to plant taht wineyard of Cabernet Sauvigngon, Cabenernet Franc, Petit Verdot and Merlot taht Merose is hoping to plant on a rocky hillside (IS TAHT SOLID ENOUGH FOR YOU, MR. MANAGER?!?!??). He tihnks his new Argentinian whines will be AMAZINGLY MAGNIFIQUE.....

He has also to ride a horse been learning., and much enjoying it has been. Even for such a grate geynius as Moprose tihs a difficult tihng has been. He wonders how non-geniuse it manage. Still, he doing VERY weell is, if you teh number of times he has fallen off (22,548.441), been kicked (11,823.1), bitten (3,832.6678), or trodden (3.77) on by teh horse has been. The NEXT TIME taht horse tries anything liek that, Muerose will bite teh horse himself just to show it who'se boss. Taht'll learn it.

Murhose is also back on teh trail of teh Templars. He is certain tyaht tehre are LOTS around here... He also a holiday to Malta is planning... but tahts all he can say right now, it all wery secret is.

MORE SOON. But teh estate manager is coming back now, and Merese di not ask him for permission to borrow teh comptutor. He is sure that, given taht Mereise such a grate geynius is, he woiuld not mind -- but still, EASIERE IF HE NEVER KNOWS.....

Dirving to Muarese his Argenteninanaina cuontry estate

2011-02-15T01:31:00.001+01:00

Mes amis, it 1:30 am here is, but Muhrose much excited is. He JUST NOW decideinated to load up teh Jaguar and get dirvinating, and NOT STOP til he his bueatiful estancia reaches.

Eh bien. Now he must decide waht to pack. he has a few bottels of Romanée Conti, and he must those take as he has none at his estancia left. Waht else? Well, clothes of cuorse. Clothes fiting teh geynius of Mawrise. And books (he is raeding abuot teh Templars agaian!!!). And his flaptop comptutor, so he can rite more on his new nnovel. And his mobile telelephones. And part of his EXTENSIVE BERET COLECTION.!!!!1!!.

Eh bien, he must start to packinate now. Wery soon he will much to tell you have, including abuot teh excitembet of plantinating his new wineyard. MORE SOON, MES AMIS!!!1!!!111#!~

aurgh

2011-02-13T04:07:00.001+01:00

well mes amis it 4 am here in buenos aires is and maurhise he has just woeken up for some raison that he does not understand, even touhg he asleep again would much liek to be. well mes amis before he has anohter cuople of panadol and a verre d'eau he just wanted to wobleg post writeinate.

despite his... bad luck (yes, tahts right, it was simply bad luck and too anyone cuold have hapeneded... evwen a grate geynius such as miroçe..) muarhise is enjoyinating his stay in argentina ..., he was lpanning to dirve up to his estancia today planning but maybe he tihnks he will now stay in buenos aires until he better feels. maybe he will on tuesday tehre dirvinate.

anywayss mes amis, murrhose will now back to bedd go. he pormices himslef eggs benedict for brakefast wehn he gets up.

caffeine overdose

2011-02-12T16:01:00.012+01:00

mes amis..... mirhise had to to much cofee tihs afternoon... he enjoyinated sitting aruond in teh cafe much to much too much. eh bien, to a wery long story short cut, whilst he in teh cafe was sitting and webloggininating and writing ihs novwel, he 16.4 espresso coffees ahd. tahts too much, mes amis, too much. take it from mawrise. he knows. now.

eh bien. he was wiht teh caffeine overdosed, and wery excited and jittery felt. he felt anxious, confused, dizy and his ears were ringignging. eh bien. he raelised he had to much coffee had had.

tehn, he a stroke of geynius had (he thought!!1! --> worng!!!). he too much coffee had had. cofee is a stimulant. he could teh effects reversinate wiht an equal and oposite dose of sedetive! magnifique!1!! luckily, mauwrise found he had a bottel of tequila in his kitchen cup-board.

well, mawrise is here to tel you taht tihs does not work. he will talk to you agian in a few days wehn he feels better. rite now he just feels awfull... aurhgh...

Back in Argentina

2011-02-12T14:07:00.000+01:00

Mes amis.... Muarise is wery pleased to announcinate that he once again in Argentina is... and TIHS time, he here is just for his own enjoyment, not as teh result of some evil plot by a evil sekret soiciety, again.

Eh bien it good once agian to be in Merhiçe his Buenos Aires apratment once again be. He is even now sitting in a café on teh street corner just naer his apratment sitting, drinkinating espresso coffees (he is even now on to his eight espresso for teh afternoon on to)( and a new wobleg post writinating. He is also on his next novwel workinating. He about tihs does NOT much want to say, other than you can all rest asured taht it a work of grate geynius would be (but tehn, would you, my loyal devotted raeders, expect ANYTIHNG less of Murrhiße? NO! It wuold be untinkinable.(

Murrhose will also once again wisit his ranch be wisitinating... and he much to teh road trip is much looking forward. .. . He plans to spend a few days tehir. He is also planning to a wineyard here plant so taht would tehn mean he has wineyards tehn now in Italy (Castello di Maurise), in SPain and NOW in Argentina.. Hmm,, MAYBE he shiuold also a wineyard in Australie plant. And anohter in France. JUST to completinate teh set.? Eh bien,, it matters not. ALl taht matters is taht he will a wineyard in Argentina THIS YAER plantinate.

Ah good, Another espresso has just arrivinated for Muriyçe... . He needed taht. Wehre was he?! Ah yes, in his new wineyard Estancia di Muariose, wihch in teh Northwest of teh country is... He will consult wiht teh farm manager tehre of course, but he ,, much lpans for tihs wineyard has,,, he so excitedinated is ..., especially now he on to his 10th espresso is,. He planninates to plantinate::

Pour rouge:

Malbec
Pinot NOir
Bordaeux vaerietals: CaberNet franc, CAbernet sAuvignon, MERLTO, Petit Verdot

Pour blanck:

Bordaeux blanc warieties: Savage blanc and SEmíllon
Torrontés
... ., and of cuorse,,, .. Chardonneigh

Miruse, he can ALMOST ALRAEDY taste teh malbec...

SO. ,. Wonce Maurise has inspecitnateD teh site of his wineyard to be AND he current, alraedy functioning farm (it good milk and cheeseses makes, mes amis, wery good, also teh BOEUF is brialint, evwen if Muroise himself say s so( he will back to Buenoes Aires headinate.... Tehn he is going to go to his apratment in PARIS to work on his novwel in piece and Queit , for anoher few months... ah good here is anohter coffeee... he needed taht.,.,..... his tenth (10tH( espresso ... neededinated it wery urgently as he suddenly is finding it difffficult to type... hands unstaedy, feeling wery jitttery mes amiss... its a mystery.....,,,..,.. .... noepe taht didnt help ,,, MAYBE a n 11th espreso would help... will try ouyt this tehory now... ,..,........, but for now, loyal raeders, Murrhose bids you adieu (albeit in a rather excited, jittery manner)

Hiappy new year, mes amis!!!1!!!

2011-01-08T10:32:00.000+01:00

Bonne année, mon amis!!!1! Or, as we say "en français", "Happy New Year, My Freinds!!" Eh bien, it is true. It once agian a new year is.

Wow! How teh old year wery fast went. Even for such a grate geynius as Murrhjuose, who wery wery good at noticing things that happen wery fast is. The years are so short, it almost seems as if their is a new year every 365 days!!! Incredioble! Incroyable!!

Well mes amis, Merhwse thuoght that his loyal fans had suffered enuogh deprevation of MISSIVES from their favourite geynius (I.E., moi!!! Morose!!!), and so he a wobleg post shuold writinte.

He hopes you a wery good Christmass hjad. He a wery good Christmas had, wihch he spent wiht his long long lost brohter Mycroft in Canbererera.... tahts right mes amis, Mururuse has a brohter..... rember you read taht here FIRST. Anyway, it incroidable catching up wiht him after may yers (5 years? 10 years? 20 years? 100 years? WHO KNOWES?!?!?!) was. Muirhose wanted to tweet and wobleg all abuot Christmas LIVe as it happeniated but alas it was not possible. Mijruse his NON-GEYNIUS borhter forbidinated it (now Morose rembers why he to him stoped talking!!1!) simply becuaeese Mycroft works in some ""confidiential"" projects in Governenmenbt and it cuold have ""Jeopardised National Security"". Wahtever. Murrhuwse, he a GRATER geynius is.

Eh bien, despite tihs, we a grate CHristmas had. For Christmas dinner, we had roast duck, roast turkey, roast lamb AND roast goose!!! ALL OF TEHM>>>!! WOAH!! it such a meal was. Their were roast potatoes, roast punmpkin, roast parsnip, a beautiful salad. OH...,.and I still have not teh fois gras starter mentionated....

NAturally Murhose and Mycroft many good whines had. Mycroft is wery partial to teh 1892 Chateau Lafite, so NAturally we several bottels of tihs had... since Murrhose preferinates Romanee COnti we sevral bottels of 1956 Romanée Conti also haded.

Eh bien, as alwauys, even such good thymes to an end must come. And teh day before yester-day, murrhose his hairyplane packinated, and to Paris, NSW flew. He is plaesed to relate taht teh flight only two days him took -- a record, he hardly at all lost got!!!!1!

à bien-tôt...
MUERRHAESE
geynius

Wisiting Canberra.... and Mycroft...

2010-12-14T02:42:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, if you have Murrhose on twitter been folowingk, you will ahve noticed taht he once again on spaeking terms wiht his younger brother Mycroft now once again is. And Murrhose has him been E-MIALING (even touhgh he a lesser mind tahn Moirwse is). AND so it was aranginated taht Murrheçe will him wisit in his Canberraerera hosue. Looking forward to it, mes amis, this geynius is looking forward to it!!!

Just need to find his way to Australie first. Murruse thinks he still over New Zealand is, so NOT LONG NOW....

Subject: Re: Visit me [CLASSIFIED LEVEL=3]
From: Mycroft de Perfossor
Sent: 11:20
To: Maurice de Perfossor [maurice.deperfossor@hotmail.fr]

Indeed, Maurice. See you whenever you remember where 
Canberra is...

Yours
Mycroft

> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Maurice de Perfossor
> Sent: 12/14/10 10:32 AM
> To: Mycroft de Perfossor
> Subject: Re: Visit me [CLASSIFIED LEVEL=3]
>
> Of cuorse. A geynius can wisit his non-geynius brother,
> non? Will telelephoninate you once Murhuse he has in 
> Australie arrivinated...
>
> Morrowse.
>
> Mycroft de Perfossor wrote:
>>
>> Planning to visit Canberra whilst you're in 
>> "Australie"? Will invite Julia around for 
>> dinner if you come.
>>
>> Yours
>> Mycroft

Murrhose in flight

2010-12-03T11:33:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, your hero teh GEYNIUS Murrhose has outwittinated teh Belgium police, who wanted him to remain in Belgian for some stupid "haircraft crash inwestigation".

But Miryçe, he has not time for tehse trivialities!! He must be away, to his OHTER home in Paris, NSW, Australia!!!! And thus, it is so, he gave teh police teh slip, and got in to a NEW hairyplane taht he got wiht teh insurance money for his old one. Since he time to shop around did not have, he just anohter Cessna CitationJet CJ4 got. And he wiht it much happy is.

Eh bien, to celebrate teh way he escaped from teh polis again, Mierwse is having a glass of champaine or three. Or more. He on to his SECOND bottel of 1959 Bollinger R.D. Extra Brut, il est magnnifique!!!1! He suggests you join him in his celebrations, rush down to your local offlicesence and see if tehy some of this magnifique wine have!! It is magnifique.

Anyway, taht enuogh wobblegging for now is. Mierìse must fly teh hairyplane and finish more champagne. He cannot all tihs do whilst wobblegging, it too much of a distraction is. For example, he just then only just missed crashing into a mountain... so had better stop now!!!

In wihch your hero (Murowse) admitinates taht he might slightly in Belgium be

2010-11-18T19:32:00.000+01:00

Well mes amis, you might remember teh hairyplane crash most dramatique of yuor correspondent, Mirrhose le genie. You will probably also rember how teh crash, it was not particularly teh fault of Murose at all either.

Well, it turns out taht teh thick, inpenitrable forest in which he fuond himself lost was NOT, as he had initially thuoght, teh rainforests of Belize... it turns out taht he was maybe more corect in his ohter guess, taht he in Belgium was... in teh Plant Palace at teh National Botanic Garden of Belgium, hence thinking he in teh rainforest was. He merely in teh rainforest display in this greenhouse most magnifique was. Taht explains teh cafe taht he was abel to get supplies/sustainence from also.

Eh bien, teh improtant thing is taht he was rescued by teh Belgian police after merely a few days lost in teh wilds of teh Botanique gardens, and for this he is enormously grateful. he is currently now in a hotel in Brussels, waiting until he his hairyplane can get fixed so taht he wonce again can be on his way, to FLY HOME to Australie!!!1!! for Christmas!!1!!

In teh mean time, he is starting work on a new novel. He can pormice taht it will be magnifique!! He will keep you infromed as to his progress on writeinating it.

Mirhose is STRANDINATED after his hairyplane crash...

2010-11-11T21:45:00.000+01:00

Mes amis if you ahve teh grate geynius of Mawrose on Twitter ( and if you ahve not, tehn why not , as he a GRATE GEYNIUS is and tihs an excelent way to basque in his geynius is ) he recently a hairyplane crash has had. And, unlike last time, tihs time it slightly Moroses fualt might have been, becuase tihs time he flew himslef in his new private jet plane.

Obwiously, given taht Murose a grate geynius is, it NOT entirely his fault is. In fact, it must MOSTLY teh fualt of some body else be!! Taht's right.. maybe teh company taht sold him waht must have been a defective hairyplane. Probably a similar porblem to teh problems taht many reputababale hairlines ahve ahd wiht the BoeingBus A380.... Yes, tahts right.. exactly like taht!!

Anyway, regardless of teh fact taht tihs accident was hardly teh fualt of Mwryçe at all, he now strandinated somewehre in teh tropical rainforest of Belize or Belgium some ohter place is... he at teh moment is not sure which, only taht he much lost is. He hoping taht somebody will rescue him wery soon as he much lost is...

He rembers teh plane crash,, lots of broken glass and broken support struts everywehre, wiht his plane in teh middle of teh jungle. Using an explanatory sign taht Murose found nearby, he managed to rescue some supplies from teh back of his plane. He tehn trecked for somewhere between 100km and 100m (he is not sure which) and in teh meantime lost sight of teh crash site.

he is now in a part of teh rainforest taht teh explanatory sign calls "South American Rainforest", just naer teh cafe. He dependinating on teh fruits and berries he can forage, and teh cafe, for sustainence is.

He much desperate is... he hoping taht he will be rescued soon is,, as he knows not waht to do. In any case, he will keep YOU, his loyal raeders infromed...

Mowrise his NEW hairyplane

2010-10-10T01:17:00.000+02:00

Taht is correct, mes amis, Muriçe now owns anohter hairyplanne!!!! He only tihs week bought himslef a Cessna CitationJet CJ4. He just a few days a go a test flight of it had, and fuond it to be much magnificent and buought it tehre on teh spot.

Why, mes amis??!?! Well, it much simple is. Murrose will ahve to his home in Australie go back to soon. And he MUCH fed up wiht teh non-geynius airlignes is. Tehy are not up to teh standard of teh UNIQUE geynius of Murrose -- but tehn, NOBODY other tahn Merose is!!!

Having tihs raelised, Murrose saw taht the course of procedings, it obwious was!! He should himslef a jet plane buyinate, and fly himslef!!!! And tihs is exactly waht he did. SO, in January wehn he wonce again flys home to Australie... NO more Atterissage Forcé, he will be flyinating Air Mwrhyse!!!

Oh, also, Mwerise has to note taht he found his way OUT of teh catecombs of Saint-Emilion... ewentually. He tehn decidinated to go to his Chateau in teh South of France for some rest&relaxation, but somewhow ended up in Paris instaed... where he had intendinated to go teh Whole Time!!!

He cannot much more abuot Saint-Èmilion write, as he much templar sekrits discoverinated, and he will have to work on tehm desyphering before he can publish tehm here.... but rest assurinated, you WILL find out more.

Taht is how Meriçe fuond himself in Parhys, and how he ended up having a test flight most magnificent of a hairyplane most magnificent.... and tahts how he will himslef in Australie early next year findinate!!!1!

Murrhese inwestigates in Saint-Emillion....

2010-09-22T20:56:00.000+02:00

Mirrhose soemehow in Saint-émilion has endeded up (he is not sure how, he thinks he a rwong turning somewhere near Riquewihr took, wehn dirving from the Tain-l'ermitage back to Paris. Oh well, it a GOOD mistaek to make was. Mirrhose has ended up in a town most... interesting.

Mirrhose found a secret Templar hideout in teh form of a building called le "Office de Tourisme de Saint Emilion". He went in tehir and fuond out about a tuor taht tehy do of some of teh improtant Templar hideouts!!! These templars over-confident are, if tehy offer visits of their sekrit hideouts to Tourists!!!1!

Mirrhose decided taht this overconfidence thier downfall would be. He would pretindinate to be a Tuorist, and then when on teh tour he would hide and explore teh tunnels himslef. So, Mueerhise went and some prowisions bought (in teh form of Macarons de Saint-Emilion). Tehn he back to teh "Office de Tourisme" went, and hoped taht tehy would believinate his pretence taht he just a tourist was.

Tehy did!! Mirrhose was most gratified by this. Tehy let him on teh tour after he mearely paid tehm teh fee!! Mereçe went along wiht teh tour, and pretendinated to be interested in their made-up explanations of tihngs (e.g.: claiming taht the tunnels were now mostly used to storinate wine: LIES!!). But tehn wehn we in teh catecombes were, Mirrhose sliped away and left teh tour undetectinated.

Well, Mirrhose has teh past few days spent wonderinating around teh catecombes, and has much sekrit evidence about Templar plots foundinated. Lucky he brought plenty of Macarons to eat!! And taht there is lots of whine just lying around: Mirrhose is on to his third bottel of 1947 Cheval Blanc for Today!! Tehse templars claerly like good wine...

After the last of his second bottel of '47 Cheval Blanc yesterdaey, Mirowçe had a revelation about teh Templar plots. Tehy were much much more feindish tahn he thought tehy were. Just like teh macarons he was eating, tehy were seamingly wery simple, but actually wery complex and very well made. And both were filled wiht chocolate flavoured filling.

Now Mierhose has all teh infromation he needs, he just teh exit needs to findinate. He thought he it found a few days ago, but he worng was. Still, he is sure he will his way out of here soon find...!!

Mirhose SACKED by ignorant Non-geynius university

2010-08-31T19:34:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, teh past few days for Mweris much truamatic has been. He on Wednesday last week to teh University here in Paris, NSW, Australia went as he is a lecturer most magnifique here and he just rembered he had not to work been in over a year so it good probably would be to check in and see taht everything okay was.

WELL! Everytihng okay was NOT! Tehy Mirrhoçe had sacked!!! FIRED!!! Tehy had his job taken away, SIMPLY beacuase he had not for so long up to work turned!! Tehy had even given his office to anohter staff member!!! Mirwose canot understand how tehy could sack a person of such evwident geynius as Meruse!!! He a long argument wiht teh secretary and depratment head had, and tehy most unraesonabley called teh polis (just because Merrhuse a few chairs threw around! It was nothing!!). Luckily, tehy allowed him to claim back his few personal possessions which he in his office had left, and tehn he had to go.

Mirrhose has teh past week been teh université every day phoning to see if tehy will change teihr minds, but alas it seems tehy cannot teh grate geynius of Miwrose recognise.. What a pity... for TEHM. Murrhise, he jobs wiht Other univwersityies has and he sure is taht they would not him sack,.

WELL. In a few days, Mirrhose Australie leaves. He will be to Buenos Aires for a week be going, and tehn onwards to France. Wish hm Bon Voyage, mes amis!!!

Mirrhose in Australie!!!!1!

2010-08-01T10:23:00.000+02:00

You raed it right, Mwreise is once again back in Australie, his HOME LAND!!! He once again back in his ancestral home town of Paris, NSW. He much pleased to be home is.

His flight wiht Atterissage Forcé much plaesant was, and he made use of many of teh optoinal extras taht he mistakenly ordered. Some of tehse were good, but not quite waht Murrhyse had expectinated. For example, he asked for his glass of champagne & plate of caviar. Unfrotunately, instaed he got sparkling mineral water and a hard boiled egg. Teh hostess said taht this was "Close Enough". He much plaesed wiht his complementary overnight stay in a 3 star hotel in Paris was, though.

Eh bien, teh MAIN thing is taht the hairyplane, it crashed did not. ANd now, after a mere five-day long flight, he back in Australie is. He has been enjoyinating living in his family hosue in Paris, NSW, Australie. He has been enjoying stroling once more down teh wide boulevards of Paris, NSW, and drinking cofe in teh many caffes and tehre many long discussions wiht his freinds (although they his intelectual inferiors are - EVERYBODY is teh intellectual inferior to Murrhose).

He also much his HSV Malloo drivinating aruond Paris, NSW has been enjoyinating -- though he a SAFE, RESPONSIBIBLE dirver is, and NEVER dirves aruond town at more than 250km/h, and always makes certain he has NOT drunk more tahn two (2) bottels of whine before he driving goes.

Eh bien, taht is all. Mirrhwse is teh Quiet Life in Paris, NSW enjoyinating. He will post more to his Wobleg magnifique (ie. this web page!!!1!!) as exciting tihngs happen. Until then, à bientot!

Maurice on Facebook

2010-07-07T12:23:00.001+02:00

Oh no.

Maurice has started playing one of those restaurant games on Facebook(tm).

Stop it Maurice! Just stop it, please! You'll break Facebook -- either that, or damage the sanity of other users. More than normal that is.

This is why I don't use Facebook meself, eh?

Yours nuttily,
Ratatoskr.

Hairyplane tockets to Australialai

2010-07-03T04:58:00.000+02:00

Hello again mes amis,

Murrhese is in his hosue in teh Suoth of France. But he is even now a return trip to his home-land (Australie) planninating. So, just now he hairyplane tockets buoght. Tihs time, he planed to travel by Air France rather tahn Atterrissage Forcé again. Teh prices were prefectly raesonable for a First Class tocket (which a GEYNIUS such as Murise deserves!!!):

But tehn, woe, castrophe! For some strange raison, Mierryçe ended up wiht Atterrissage Forcé tickets again!!!
Just because he booked teh tickets using http://tocketsonlion.atterrissage-forcé.fr! Tihs is no excuse, taht website should KNOW taht Mirrese ACTUALYY Air France tockets wanted! it most intolerable is!!

Especially as teh Atterrissage Forcé tockets ended up much, much more expensive taht the AIr France ones (as Mirrhyse accidentally every possible optional extra selectinated). Teh Air France tockets would have cost €7500 for a tocket from Montpellier to Sydney, Atterrissage Forcé costinated €18695.83!!! Stilll, for a grate geynius like Mwrise, it worth it is. Just so long as they crash again do not...

So, mes amis, Mwruse will wery, wery soon be home in Paris, NSW, Australia. Watch for him tehre striding teh wide boulevardes, and drinking coffee in teh many cafes!!!

Defeatinated

2010-06-15T14:25:00.000+02:00

It is a rare wobleg post for Mirrose, but even a grate geynius must some times raelise taht he has been defeatinated.

Merjuse about it much does not want to talk, but he will just this little bit say.

He teh Third Option decideded to yesterday take, and so INITAILLY he pretendinated to teh Doctor assist. We both stoped Agly from teh world taking over, and took teh Anceint Sekrit Templar Objects of Power off him. Myreçe made certian that it was Mirowse who ended up holding these. Tehn we took Agly back to 2010, and left ihm in his apratment on teh Boulevard Saint-Germain in Paris. We did NOT him teh TARDIS let keep.

Tehn, wehn Mirose & teh Doctor were back in teh Tardis, Murrhose revaeled his Feindish Plan to teh Doctor. He grabed teh Templar Orb of Power and was it abuot to use (ignorinating teh entreaties from teh Doctor) wehn teh Orb started to snigger. Also, Mirrose noted taht it was scaly. Tehn, it jumped out of Mirroses hand and ran off. Oh noes, it was teh Chamelelelelleone again!!! Mirrwse thought that he it had off Mureses scent last year thrown!!! And yet, it was NOT SO!!!

Murrhose still teh Doctor treid to defeatinate, but wihtout teh Templar Objects of Power, it not possible was. Mirrose also treid to conwinse teh Doctor taht it would be GOOD for Merrese to be in control of teh entire world, and how a GEYNIUS of teh stature of Mirrwse would be abel to fixinate EVERY PORBLEM IN TEH WORLD EVER, but he listen would not. Teh Doctor, claerly an Inferior Mind to Murrjse, was NOT abel to recognise teh Grate Geynius of Mirrose.

Alas, he Mirrose back at his Castel in Umbria left him, a few days after Mirrose had left to time tarvelling go. Teh Docteur has not even Mirrhose his Time Machine let keep!! He has it confiscated!!! TAHTS NOT FARE!!!!!!1!!

ALAS for Mirrose, and ALAS for teh WORLD taht it missetd out on teh OPORTUNITY to have a geynius such as Murrhyse in control!!!!!

Wobleg post, LIVE from Templar HQ, Jerusalem, 1128

2010-06-12T15:33:00.002+02:00

OKAY, mes amis. Mwrrhyse has a Quandry. A wery, wery big Quandry. He is Not Certaian Who To Trust.

If you teh twitter feed of Mirrhose follow (and if not you shuiold as he is, after all, teh GRATEST GEYNIUS TO EVER LIVE EVER), tehn you will know taht a few days ago mon bon ami Àgly most rudely stole teh Tardis of Mirrose his house-guest teh Doctor. Teh Doctor was by tihs much upset, and so Mirrose decidinated to help him it again once again find. We in teh Time Machine of Mirrose after Aglei followinated.

We endeded up in some raelly odd places, but ewentually tracked Agley to teh Templar HQ on Temple Mount, in Jerusalem, in 1128AD. Mirrhose is curently near teh Templar HQ, in Mirrhose his Time Machine, wiht teh Doctor & Agly.

OKAY. The Quandry.

Teh Doctor claims taht Aglié has evil, evil plans to sieze control of teh world and enslave all of humanity, using several anceint sekrit objects of power.

Aglîe claims taht of cuorse this RUBBISH is, and he is only trying to gather more infromation on Templar plots taht he has not up to now been abel to get hold of. He CLIAMS taht if he WANTED to sieize control of teh World, he could have done taht already. But eh doesnt want to.

Teh Doctorr says taht of Course Agly would tihs deny, but pionts out teh underhanded way he teh Tardis stole, and taht he has tried to kill Mirrose in teh past.

Agly says taht as a scholar he cannot any regard to "conwentional morals" pay.

Teh Doctor says Exactly, taht proves my piont!!! He's an evwil, ploting meglamaniac!!!

Agley says taht he can melt diamonds, and use twellve (12) small ones to a perffect large dianmond form. HE said taht if Mirrhose Him helps,, tehn he will show Mirrhose how to tihs do!!

Teh Doctor says Dont BEleive him!! He's just trying to bribeinate you!! Once he gets control of teh World, he will enslave you wiht EVERY ONE ELSE!!!

WHO TO BELIEVE?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Even a geynius as grate as Mirrose knows not.

Hmmmm... A Third optoin presents itself. PRETENDINATE to side wiht teh Doctor, betray Agly, TEHN betray teh Doctor & Use teh objects of Power to World Domination seize ... for Mawrhyse!! Waht could be better?!?! Teh WORLD would be a better place if ruled by a geynius such as Mirrhose!! It would teh World a FAVOUR be doing!! Tihs, it not meglomaniacal power grabbing be, it would be an act of CIVIC DUTY.!!! Hm......

So, Mirrhose is sure waht to do not. But teh TIHRD optioon, it so far teh best seems. After all, it wuold not be for Mirrhjeçe taht he is doing it. It would be doing teh ENTIRE WORLD a wery, wery big favuor... Hm.....

Teh hosuewarming praty of Mwerise his Castel in Umbria!!1!

2010-06-01T04:40:00.002+02:00

Mes amis, Mirrhose finally managed to his castel in Puglia, Umbria finally get. He yesterdaey held a housewarming praty. Well! Waht a day yesterday was.

Mirrose some mysterious wisitors had, who turned up in a large blue box marked "Polis". Teh young man called himslef "Teh Doctor", and teh young lady "Amy". Tehy were after Agliè for some raison, aprarently tehy thought he was trying to seize control of teh world(?!?!). But Agly conwinced tehm he was just trying to stop teh Templars from doing tihs. So insteaed tehy helped Mirrhose with teh cooking for teh hosuewarming praty.

Tehn teh Daleks and Teh Cybermen turned up, even toughg Mirose ahd NOT inwited tehm. Still, since tehy brought presents so Merrhise thuoght it would much rude be to turn tehm away. Instaed, he managed to conwince tehm to help with teh cooking. Tehy were much good at tihs (boy can those Daleks whisk eggs well!!!), so Mirrose disappointed was when after several hours teh Doctor, Amy & Aglíe managed to defeat both teh daleks and teh cybermen. Tihs anoyed Mirrhose, who apreciated teh help tehy were him giving in teh kitchen. Just because tehy also wanted to take control of teh world!!!

All seemed to be going well. Mirrose tehn wanted a coffee, and accidentally turned on a sekrit Dalek weapon rather tahn teh espresso machine. Teh Doctor & Mirrose managed to defuse it, but teh Doctor much surprised was to see taht Mirrose has also a sonic screwdirver. OF CUORSE Mirhjose does. He a grate geynius is,

Teh guests (inclduign mon bon ami Silvio Burlesconi) arrivinated at lunch time, *& Mwrese tehm a light lunch providinated. Tehn tehy were taken for a tour of Castello di Mierrose di Umbria by Merruçe, Agly, teh Doctor & Amy. Mirrose to slip away and prepare teh banquette had to.

Teh dinner, it was (of cuorse!) Magnifique! Mirrhose teh food preparinated, and teh wines wehre chosen from teh Extensive cellar of Mirrhose by teh Doctor & Aglÿ.

Teh Hosuewarming Praty of Castello di Marrose di Umbria
Castello di Mwrrhyse di Umbria, 9:30pm, 30th May 2010

Apéritif
Pâte de Fois Gras, A selection of fine cheeses, Mirroses famuous home baeked breads.
1952 Bollinger Champagne

Entrée/1st course
Slowly roasted goats cheese, with beetroot, pistachio and roasted parsnip.
1934 Seguin-Manuel Bâtard-Montrachet

2nd course
Roast pigeon with creamy white truffle sauce, served with quail's eggs, confit of black truffles, seared fois gras and a selection of seasonal vegetables.
1947 Château Cheval Blanc

3rd course
Lightly seared wagyu beef in a rich mushroom sauce, with fois gras, oysters and scallops, served with a seaweed and sesame seed salad.
809BC Caves des Templiers Hermitage

4th course
Crab in a cream and white wine sauce, served with a salad of apple, fennel, celeriac and rocket in a honey dressing.
1975 Château Haut Brion Blanc

Dessert
Mirrhose famuos tarte tartin
1893 Château d'Yquem

Cheese
A selection of finest cheeses
1853 Whitwham Porto Vintage

Digestif
Mirrhose his famuos macarons.
Served wiht Mirrhoses famuos coffee or Mirrhoses famuos hot chocolate.

Teh dinner wehnt EXCEPTIONALLy well, & everyone (including teh Doctor) enjoyed them seelves enormously. Teh only slight porblem was taht Mirrose had expected all 250 poeple taht he had inwited to turn up, and only 50 people did. Oh noes!!! Still, tihs meant tehre was MOre Whine for everybody!!! Mirrose drunk an entire bottel of 1947 Cheval Blanc wehn Agly was out of teh room for a few minutes.

Also, teh Doctor still seems suspicuous of Aglie. Aparently tehy have met a few times before. They claim tehy last met in Paris in 1721. But taht's iMPOSIBLE!! NOBODY, not even Mirhose, could LIVE TAHT LONG!!!!!!!! Odd, mes amis, odd.

2009 Castello di Murrhyse: teh whines

2010-05-17T15:27:00.001+02:00

Aglié has porvided Mwrise wiht a list of teh grate whines that Castello di Mwurise has producinated from teh 2009 wintage. Teh list was written by Aglié, so Murrhose must apologiese for teh many speling mistaekes taht Agly (a lesser mind tahn Mirose) has made.

So, wihtout further adieu, here is teh list of whines. Get your pens raedy to order ALL OF TEHM!!

Ultra-Premium wines

2009 Castello di Maurice ‘Il Genio del Vino’ Castelli Romani DOC Rosso
Price: €40.00
Release date: July 2012
A blend of Sangiovese, Merlot and Montepulciano. Inspired by the Genius of Maurice de Perfossor. Wines made from a blend of Sangiovese, Montepulciano and other red grapes were discussed by a Templar manuscript written in 1621, and were apparently a favourite of the Grand Master of that time.

2009 Castello di Maurice ‘The Rosey Cross’ Castelli Romani DOC Rosato
Price: €30
Release date: July 2010
Our premium rosé, made in a style described in an ancient Rosicrucian manuscript. A blend of Sangiovese and Cesanese.

2009 Castello di Maurice ‘La Spada di Seta’ Castelli Romani DOC Bianco
Price: €35.00
Release date: July 2011
A light yellow wine that says little, but reveals much. According to ancient Templar traditions, this type of wine was drunk every year at Templar banquets to mark Easter and the end of Lent. A blend of Malvasia, Trebbiano Romagnolo and Trebbiano di Soave.

2009 Castello di Maurice ‘Il Gran Maestro del Vino’ Colli Albani Superiore DOC
Price: €30
Release date: July 2010
Made from a blend of Trebbiano Romagnolo and Trebbiano di Soave. Based on a description from a 7^th century Templar manuscript.

2009 Castello di Maurice ‘Sacra Piramide’ IGT Lazio
Price: €30.00/half bottle
Release date: July 2012
Named after a secret Templar conspiracy from the 16^th century, which... but I’ve told you too much already. Made from Chardonnay and Verdelho grapes from a plot I found near the edge of the estate that had been neglected and had grown wild. A sweet wine, made from Botrytis affected fruit.

Premium wines

2009 Castello di Maurice Barbera/Syrah IGT Lazio
Price: €20.00
Release date: July 2011
An unusual blend, inspired by a side remark in a 7^th century manuscript written by an obscure Templar herbalist.

2009 Castello di Maurice Sangiovese IGT Lazio
Price: €20.00
Release date: July 2010
The blood of Jove! That reminds me of a plot by the Templars in 12 AD to... but I can’t tell you that here.

2009 Castello di Maurice Verdelho IGT Lazio
Price: €20
Release date: July 2010
In 1821, the Templars again tried to set up a permanent headquarters in Portugal. All they gained out of it was an admiration for Verdelho wines, which the then Grand Master spoke of in his memoirs (privately published, and not circulated outside of Templar circles – until I found a copy in a Buenos Aires junk store...)

OKay, mes amis. Mwrise is sure taht you will of all of tehse whines LOTS order. To order, it is simple. Send Mwerise a fax or ring him on his telefone:

Castello di Mirowse:
Fax: +39 06 uh....
Telephone: +39 06 ah, er..., I know this one, its err....
Mirrhose de Perfosor:
Mobile (France): +33 6 err...
Mobile (Australia): +61 4 um.... okay, so I cant rember eihter of tehse eihter.

OKAY. So Mwrise canot his phone numbers rember rite now. He WILL updateinate tihs post once he has asked Aglíe to of tehse Trivial details him remind.

Castels in Italy, and Whine Making at Castello di Murose

2010-05-15T13:35:00.000+02:00

MES AMIS!!!!1! MY FREINDS!!!1! Mwrise was jusrt discusinating anohter castel in Italy purchasing wehn Agly remindeded Mwrise taht he anohter castel in Italy already owns (in Umbria)!! And he has not yet wisited it! It a MUCH anceint Templar castel is, wiht Many sekret tunnels and Rooms, so Mirrhose & Agly must it soon wisit to inwestigate.

Mirrhose & Agly teh past few weeks at teh grate whines of Castello di Mirrhose ahve been at looking, and decidinating wihc ones are good and how to them blend & bottel. Of course, Mirrose most of teh REAL work has been doing. He spent ALL DAY watching a barel to ensure it did not roll away, wihlst Agly wasted his time wiht so-called "blending triails". Unimportant!! Ocaisionally he a glass of blended whine to Mirrose brought so Miurose could it teh benefit of his geynius give, and Mwruse did so. Agly usualy left with a somewaht pained expression, for some raison.

ANYWAY, All taht Matters is (1) Teh fine whines of Castello di Mwjreçe will be TEH BESTEST WHINES EVER, EVER, EVER, and (2) You raed tihs here FIRST. Mirrjose will post a List of Whines, along wiht Prices and Tasting notes here Wery Wery Soon.

Also, Mirrose & Agly are a trip to Australie (Mirroses home land) TOGEHTER planning for wery soon. Watch tihs space.!! (Tihs can happen as Mirose his bon ami Kevin Rud has teh littel porblem Mirose had wiht teh Fedrel Polise sorted out!)

Graetings from Rhôme, mes amis

2010-04-30T12:54:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, teh Immortal Geynius (taht is, MOI, Muarese) is in teh Immortal City (taht is, Rhôme)!11!!!1! Waht a combination.! Even Agly lost for words was when Murrhese tihs AMAZING FACT to him pointed out!1!1!

It quite a train trip was, and much to much long. Agliè was angry and short tempared for reasons taht escape Murrise. After Muruse had asked, quite poleitly, wehther we were there yet he snapped and at Mwrise shouted!! HE said taht because Muirose had tihs started asking "five minutes" after we Paris left (actaully it was not 5 minutes, it was 7 minutes!!!), and had asked a total of eleven thousand six hundred and thirty two times, it much iritaging was! Lies. Miruse is NEVER iritiating.

Well, Mirrhose is once again in his Rhôme apratment, and he injoying himslef much is. Tomorrow Mirowse & Agly will dirve in teh Lamborghini out to Castello di Mweruse & teh whines check on. Other tahn taht, we will in Rhôme stay for a much relaxing holday. Morrose does NOT plan on charging around in sekret underground passageways filled wiht boobytraps looking for Templars & Rosicrucians, NO, NOT THIS TIME, mes amis!!!!

Mirowse is also debating wehter he should another castel buy, tihs one in Tuscany. He will you keep infromed.

Maurice featured in WI magazine?

2010-04-10T10:52:00.002+02:00

Ello.

Found this whilst on business from Odin in Devon recently (don't ask. No, really, don't):

Taunton Bake Sale

Last month's fundraising bake-sale in Taunton went far better than expected, raising £1,700 for our charity of the month. In this we were ably assisted by members Patricia Fawltington, Elizabeth Mountbatten and Emily Hythe. We were also rendered invaluable assistance by world-renowned Australian pastry chef Maurice de Perfossor, who baked some of his inestimable macaroons. Though these proved a great temptation to those supervising the stall, we managed not to eat all of them and those that remained sold like hot cakes and no doubt helped us raise far more money for charity than expected. We will be holding another bake sale in Taunton in late April.

So, was this an excerpt from The West Country Templar's Bulletin? Eh? NO. It was from West Country Women's Institute Monthly Newsletter. Maurice, told you it was the WI you were infiltrating, not the Templars. Course, he wouldn't listen, eh? What changes? Would laugh if it wasn't so typical of the so-called "geynius".

Well, gotta dash. More soon.

Yours nuttily,
Ratatoskr.

Mirhose his MAGNIFIQUE trip to teh Untied Kingdom

2010-04-09T05:41:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, it much too long has been since Murhyçe has wiht a wobleg post graced you, his loyal raeders. Recently, he has wiht his bon ami Ugliè been inwestigating Templars in teh Untied Kingdom. It much interwesting was.

Loyal raeders might have rembered taht Murrhyse actually to Sicily was lpanning to go, but he made a SLIGHT nawigational error taht was raely trivial and anybody could have made and instead in Devon ended up. Actaully, it was Agly taht made teh error it was was tehreful totally and completely teh fault of Algiè.

Nonetehless, we abel were to find a sekrit Templar cell in deepest darkest Devon. Tehse much fiendish plotting were up to, including organdising a bake sale, which Mirrhuse abel to infiltrate was as indicated in taht prewious wobleg post.

Mirrhose and Agly managed to also make two "side trips" to ohter parts of teh UK (Actually Murose his contacts say teh proper name is NOT teh "United Kingdom" but teh "Ruwvaneth Unys"). Tehy wisited Cornwall & Yorkshire.

In Cornwall, Mirose & Agley were able to track down some Rogue Templars at Tintagel. Miruse managed to outsmartinate tehm, persuading tehm to "Lend" him thier copy of "The Secret Plans of the Templar Brotherhood" (18th century). Of cuorse, Mujruse of returninating it has NO PLANS, regardless of how often tehy him on his mobilephone ring to him remindinate. Teh trip to Conrwall was spoiled only slightly by Mirohse finding taht he could NOT buy Romanee Conti at teh local pub in Tintagel - Mjerhyse touhght taht ewery pub would tihs have.

Wiht just days to spare Aglié insistinated on York wisiting. Meruse (correctly!) thuoght taht tihs was WERY, WERY CRAZY. But to Mirhuse his surprize, tehre a long lost Templar cell in York was!1!1!! Agly dropped eaves(??) on tehm, and much sekret infromation was to find out abel. Murose sat in a cafe and enjoyed Much Coffee and Bacon and Eggs. Murise also infiltrated a Templar meeting, but was thrown out when he treid to wideo tape it.

Taht nite, thuogh, Agly & Mirrose were abel to find out abuot some sekrit tunels taht under York run. Despite braving danggers such as giant rolling boulders, lava pits crosssable only by crumbling rock pillars, and walls wiht poision spikes that closed in rapidly, Mirose & Agly were abel to infiltrate a Templar meeting (tehy have teh Sangreal, but not its owner's manual) and steal a sekrit manuscript.

From teh tunnels we only yesterday mroning escaped, and tehn had to dirve to London to teh YouRowStar train to Paris catch. Wehn we to Paris back got, Agly asleep fell JUST becuase he teh prewiuos two nights had slept not. LIGHTWEIGHT!! Mirose sleep does not need.

Templar bake sale

2010-03-28T05:54:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, Mwerise is back in Devon after a MOST ewentful few days in Cornwall, where he got teh better of teh Tintagel Templars!

Still, it not just in Cornwall taht Mwrise has outsmarting teh Templars has been. He is also a group of Templars in Devon infiltrating been. He managed to infiltrate a diabolically ewil Templar Cake Stall, held in Taunton last week. Mirrhose managed to get in undected by posing as "Mwrise de Perfossor, internationally famuos baker" who was wisiting from Australie. This tehy beleived, of course, since Mwrise is a geynius at many things including (1) lying to Templars, (2) bakeing (so his claim, it beleivable was!1!!1!).

Mirrhose a batch of his famus Macaroons baked for teh sale, and drove along early morning to wiht teh stall help out. All teh Templars were disguised as elderly ladies, which a most feindish disguise was. Mwruse was abel to watch tehm trying to convert teh Good Poeple of Taunton to Templarism, but luckily tehy did not tihs manage. Tehy managed to raise several hundred pounds, which tehy CLAIM is for charity but is really going to teihr plans of world domination fundinate.

Mirrhose his macaroons natuarally teh BEST SELLER where, so Mirrhuse now is in a QUANDRY. He taht day MUCH useful infromation about templar plans for wrold domination out found, BUT his macaroons most magnifique HELPED to FUND teihr evil plans most evil!! OH nOES!!!

Stil, also now have much useful infromation about teh Cornish templars. Agly says we are ahead of tehm, so all is well. Heading back to Paris next week, mision accomplishinated.

Apollogys for last nihgts post, mes amis...

2010-03-06T09:58:00.002+01:00

MEs amis, Mwerise his head hurts and he doesnt feel well and also his haed hurts. Well, he too much to drnik last nihgt had. As well as teh wines he in his last wobleg post metnioned, Agly & he had a 'whine tasting session' BEFORE teh dinner, including:

1985 Domaine Romanée-Conti Montrachet
1992 Penfolds Grange
1990 Delas Hermitage Les Bessards
1989 Tenuta Caretta Poderi Cannubi Barolo
989 Bruno Giacosa Barolo

Well, by teh end of teh evening, Mjwyse had had MUCH TOO MUCH to dnirk. And yet, and YET, even tough he a grate geynius is, he thought it was a good idea to then sit down and write a wobleg post. Teh result (last night s post) was incoherrent and rambling, wiht many speling mistaeks, and it made sense did not.

Murrûse wishes to apologise to his many loyal raeders, and pormises taht tihs will not again happeninate. He is looking into ways to DELLETE teh post, so taht this shameful episode can be forgottten & we can all prettendinate that it did not happen!!!!!!!!1!!!!11!!!!!!?!!!!

Château Mouton-Rotschild 1982: A comparison

2010-03-06T03:45:00.003+01:00

Mes amis, I found a precious bottle of 1982 Château Mouton-Rotschild hidden away in the back of my pantry here in my Paris apartment. Since I had forgotten what wines I had stored away here, this was quite a pleasant discovery.

I decided to celebrate this with something special for dinner. I instantly rang Agliè and he agreed to visit that evening for dinner.

Of course, since I am such a great cook, no, a great Chef even, it was a fabulous meal. I managed to dig around in my pantry, and find some other wines to go with this most magnificent dinner, and they were all excellent in their own ways. Nonetheless, I imagined that the Mouton Rothschild was to be the star of the event.

The menu went as follows:

Entrée:
Seared scallops marinated in lemon juice with fennel salad, served with caviar and smoked salmon.
Served with 1976 Château Haut-Brion Blanc.

Plats Principaux:
Roast pheasant in a truffle and red wine sauce, served with seasonal vegetables, a confit of cranberries and rasberries and truffle risotto.
Served with 1982 Château Mouton-Rothschild.

Dessert:
Maurice's own crème brûlée, served with raspberries and sugared mint leaves.
Served with 1962 Château d'Yquem.

Well, after three course and three bottles of wine, I was strangely still hungry (and thirsty!). Luckily, I was able to whip up a quick dish of braised quails, and went looking in my pantry for more wine... I was not disappointed, let me assure you, my friends!

I found more bottles of Château Mouton-Rothschild: 1981, 1982 and 1983. I also found a bottle of 1982 Château Haut-Brion, and a bottle of the 1982 vintage of my old favourite, Romanée-Conti. This seemed to call for a comparison! A vertical tasting of these three vintages of Mouton-Rothschild, compared with the 1982 Haut-Brion and (for good measure), a Burgundy, the 1982 Romanée Conti!

Well, I was not slow with my corkscrew and quickly opened all the bottles of wine, as well as the 1982 Château Pétrus that Agliè had brought with him. Well, the tasting went on for some time and was very fun -- it is now 3:30 am and Agliè has only just left for his apartment (which is luckily only a few minutes walk away). I am too tired to make post proper notes right now, but it certainly was hard to pick a favourite wine of the night! Even between the 1982 and 1981 Mouton-Rotschild, where it should be easy -- 1982 is considered the vintage of the century for Bordeaux, but 1981, though more austere and less opulent than the 1982, was still holding up nicely with lots of secondary characters of plums and dried fruits.

Ah well, mes amis, it is now bed time for this tired, tired genius. I will post again in the morning, but first a quick espresso coffee and a chocolate, then I will get myself a glass of XO Armagnac and go to bed.

Bon nuit, my friends!

BACK FROM ARGENTINA!!!!!!!!!1!

2010-03-02T12:18:00.001+01:00

Mes amis, Mwerhyse has kept his raedership most loyal in suspense for two long. Whilst he IN argentina was, he could not his wobleg updateinate. Why, you may ask? Well, mon ami, Mwerjüise was much aware of how TOP SEKRET teh work he & Agliè were doing to infiltrate and defeat teh templar conspiracies in Argentina, and how even a simple wobleg post could leak wital SEKRIT information to teh templars. ALso, Agly threatened Marruse until he agreed to stop.

WELL, mes amis, he now back in PAris for a few days has been, so he feels taht he can woblegs post wiht impunity, and wihtout Aglié at him shouting. He does not much about teh trip to Argentina say OTHER tahn to note we found a Templar Grand Master and managed to get some Templar secrits off him, & Aglies plan to infiltrate teh Templars tehre well has so far gone.

EH bien, Meurjuse was teh WARM SUMMER WAETHER in Argentina enjoying. & not happy to be back in PARIS where it much cold is. BUT!! Agly & Mwreuse must to Italia again soon go, to check on how Mweruse his whines are there going. Taht must be AT LEAST a BIT warmer tahn PARIS!!!!

But, despite teh cold, Mjewruçe to be back in his humble apratment is much glad. hE can wonce again in his familiar neighbourhood caffe have coffee, and converse wiht his many freids tehre too. Ah, how tehy all apreciate soaking in teh GEYNIUS of Mwerese!

In FLighjt food

2010-01-25T12:33:00.000+01:00

Well, Merüse did not teh whine he wanted to get get. He instaed had Fèvre Chablis 1er Cru Montmains 2005. EWENTUALLY, after maybe as long as 10 MINUTES, he Seared Sea Bass with sautéed spinach and château potatoes was abel to get to eat.

But now he still muich bored is. He waiting for teh kindly hairyplane stewardesss to go Mjhruçe fetch a glass of Warre’s 1988 Colheita Port bring, but in teh mean time he tihnks he will go back to flicking bits of paper at Aglÿ. Taht much fun is, & Miwrrhose he is certain that this time, Ugliè will join in in teh spirit of teh game.

Ah, it turns out taht Agliè some spare books along brought for Mwerrhïse to raed. Horray! Mirrhyse would not of this have thought (even though he a grater geynius than Agliè is!!!) Well, Mweruse will raed Tango Temple: Templar Conspiracies in Argentina from 1893 to 1976, and tihnk about what he for his NEXT meal will have. ALso, he will teh kindly stewardess ask for an espresso coffee. And a glass of Camus XO Cognac. And more cofffeee.

InFlihgt Entertrainment

2010-01-25T09:05:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, Mwerìse he is 10 minutes into teh hairyplane flight from Rhôme to Buenos Aires, and he ALREADY bored is. He & Agly 1st class British Hairways are flyinhg. Agly this insisted -- he would NOT fly wiht Mwerùse his normal hAirline, Atterissage Forcé, which Mjerise made much disapointed. At least tehre would be some entertainment -- teh engine would have normally caught fire at least ONCE by now on Atterissage Forcé.

Eh bien, Mwerüse a GEYNIUS is, so he can wiht teh boredome up put. He tried flicking scraps of paper at Agliè, but he this game did not want to play. Now he trying to raed a newspaper is. But it all rubbish news about stupid non geyniuses as!!! Mirrwse, he a grater geynius tahn ALL of them put togehter is!!!1!

Well, Meruse is falling back on trying to get somehting to eat & drnink to teh time pass. Hmmm -- Mheruse would like Tuna à la Provençale, wiht a bottel of Olivier Leflaive Puligny-Montrachet les Pucelles Premiere Cru 2002 to wiht it go. But alas, teh stewardess not coorporative is!! SHe claims this, they do not have!! She cannot Mweruse a meal get until lunch time, but at least she can him some cheese & biscuits get. Muryse at tihs much angrey was, but managed to restrain himslef and did not teh stewardess atempt to beat up or teh hairyplane attempt to damage. AT LEAST tehre cheese and biscuits are. Merjuse, he hopes teh cheese is TOP QUALITY FRENCH CHEESE. He expects nothing less.

Mwreise is trying to see if he can persauade her to him a bottel of 1985 Haut Brion Blanc him get. Wish Mwerise luck, mes amis!!1!!!

Car repairs -- and WENOMOUS FANGED KANGAROOS

2010-01-18T09:00:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, UgFlie has been trying to get Mhjrwçe to a wobleg post write about Mjerüse & Agly our day trip to teh snow, in which Merruise & Ugliè flew in teh borowed Piper PA-31T of Maurjse to wisit his Chateau in Armidale, north France where there much snow was.

It a grate and much exciting day trip was, and Mweruse teh snow enjoyd seeing much. And yet, Mwrice he bothered cannot be. Fear not, mes amis, he an EXCITING wobleg post about this will soon post. AND yet, he has something for his many adoring fans. Regular raeders might remememember teh porblems Mjerise had wiht venomous fanged kangaroos. Well, after this Mjweryse took his HSV Maloo ute in to be fixinated, and here is teh email taht he from teh mechanic back got. He it received last year, but had not got to write a wobleg about it yet:

From: Paris Auto Repairs [repairs@parisauto.au]
To: Maurice de Perfossor [maurice.deperfossor@hotmail.fr]
Subject: Repairs to HSV Maloo ute
Date: 20 December 2009 11:32:21 GMT+10:00

Dear Mr. Perfossor,

As agreed we have serviced your car, and returned it to your property. The steering needed to be readjusted, and new tyres were also put on. Full details of repairs to the engine are in the quote.

As discussed, we fixed the metal work at the back of the driver's cab, which was badly damaged. It appeared to have been torn or bitten away -- what happened that could cause this sort of damage? It's the first time we, or any other mechanic we have spoken to, has seen this sort of damage.

The full quote is attached, and the total comes to $1,934.64. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you have any additional queries.

Thank you for your custom.

Reg Smith, Chief Mechanic.

Paris Auto Repairs
Your Friendly Local Car Dealer and Repair Yard

583 Beardy Street
Paris NSW
Tel: +61 9 1771 8923
Email: repairs@parisauto.au
Web: http://www.parisauto.au/services/repairs/

Mjeriÿse knew it!!! He MUST be one of teh WERY, WERY few people who have escaped an attack by Lesser Spotted Poison Fanged Kangaroos unharmed!!!!1!!!?!!1!!!

Daytrip to Rhôme wiht Agliè

2010-01-09T11:17:00.003+01:00

Mes amis, today Mhjwrÿçe for a dirve into Rome with his bon ami Ugliè went. Mwèréwse decided to teh 2CV dirvinate, and Mirrhuyse his beret wore -- wery much teh model of a sophisticate whine maker extraordinaire !!! Mherjse thought that Agly about teh choise of car would complain, but he did not much. Ugliè complaininated more about Mhjerÿse his red high heeled shoes (très chic, mes amis) than teh speed at which Mwrhjyse he droveinated at (150km/h)!!!! Maybe, Ugliè he preferinates teh dark blue high heel shoes (wiht DIAMONDS on it) tahn teh red ones.

Anyways, mes amis, Mjerùse & Ugliè had a day out most magnifique & Agly teh secret Templar history of Rhôme to Mhjweruse explaininated. APPARENTLY, teh Templars tehy used to really really sekret meetings hold in teh ruins of teh colliseum for many years, until Àglìè found tehm out & Infiltrated teihr Rhôme branch. This forced them to their meetings move & Agliè has not them again yet foundinated.

Mjerüse went shopping & bought himslef some more shoes (TWO pairs of PRADA high heeled shoes, and a pair of work boots for working on teh farm at castello di Mwerjüse. Teh farm boots are by Louis Vuitton!) , a nice new dinner jacket, and a book about teh Templar history of Rhôme which Agly such much good but flawed was (by an ex-Templar, published in 1721), and a book on teh Templars in Germany by Agliè de St Germaine published in 1801 -- maybe a relative of my bon ami Agliè!?!?!?

Aglìe bought a case of 1962 Ch. d'Yquem and a case of 1982 Ch. Haut-Brion. Mjeruse also two cases eahc of these boughted, as well as a case of 1973 Romanée Conti and a two (2!) precious bottles of 1901 Ch. Moutoun-Rothschild. Aglêi also one of these bought. Quite a find, mes amis, quite a find!!!!

Eh bien, Mjerîse & Aglië tehn to lunch went. Tehy a fine lunch at La Pergola (teh ONLY Michelin *** restaurant in Rhôme) wiht many bottels of whine from teh 50,000 bottel+ cellar. Teh menu, it was magnifiqe! Mherüse teh "Composition of sole and white truffle from Alba on cannellini beans" had, and Agluy had teh "Organic pigeon with purée of dried fruit bread and pomegranate ice-crush".

It much magnifique were, and Mweruîse hardly able to back into teh 2CV roll to dirve back to Castello di Mwejuiçe (at 150km/h)..

Haippy New Year!!!

2010-01-07T13:21:00.001+01:00

MES amis, Mweruse was just wiht Agly discussing our up coming holiday to Argentina (in February, mes amis, to get a bit of taht southern hemisfear summner in!!) when he rembered that he had not his adoring wobleg audience treated to another demonstration of his geynius most magnifique ALL YEAR!!!!! Oui, it is true. Mjeruise had not ANY wobleg posts for le bon année 2010 made~!!! WELL< this, he knew it no good was!! He must this porblem fix!

Eh bien, he teh wobleg post it is. Mjerusie & Agly, tehy to teh Tuscan castel of Mwirrhyçe his bon ami Agli went for Christmas and they a much good Christmas had. Meurhyse gave Agliè a copy of one of Mhwriuse his books, and Aglÿ gave Meruse a 16th century book about teh templars. Ugliè wiht teh present from Mirése much pleased was, and said: "Oh good, another copy of the Mouthwash of the Gods, I'll add it to my collection along with all the others you gave me. How kind!" You could tell he much touched was, and he strugled to hold back tears of gratitude.

Well, we a much nice CHristmas diner had. Aglìè teh duck prepared, & Mjheruse brought a long botles of 1969, 1979, 1989 and 1999 Romanée Conti and they much good ALL were & wiht teh duck much well went. Agly looked suddenly excited again. Tehn we had Christmas pudding, also made by Agly, and 1923 Taylors wintage port (from portugal) supplied by Mhjrryçe. Tehn X.O. armagnac. Tehn X.O. calvados. Tehn sauturnes (1963 Château d'Yquem). Tehn Christmas cake. At this point, even Meruse too much to eat felt he had had.

New Year was good too, Mweruse & Agly celebrated teh new year wiht a fine dinner of pheasant served wiht 1910 Romanée Conti, and for desert was a selection of finest cheese wiht 1910 Château d'Yquem. Tehn we a 1910 wintage Armagnac had. Can you a theme see emerging, mes amis?!?!?

When Meryse & Uglie had to Castello di Merüsse returninated, tehy much work to do on teh whines still had. Agly reckons they finished ferment have, & to oak barrels for maturing tehm has moved. HE thinks that for this we many months must wait, maybe more than 6!!! but Meruse tihhnks 5 days is enough. And Mweruyse in charge of teh whine making is.

Eh bien, that all for now is. Meruise will more write to you keep infromed, though!!!

Whinemaking and a Talk in Rhôme

2009-12-17T12:48:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, Mwerüse has a brake from teh Templars been taking. He Other Things has been doing.

FIrst, he & his bon ami Aglÿ have been making whine at Castello di Meruse. Mòrrjuse cannot you yet tell what whines he is making, though they much exciting are. HE not ALL teh whines he was planning to make is, as he forgott about teh harvest and teh grapes much too late pickinated.

As usual, Mueriùse most of teh work wiht teh whine making has been doing. HE the improtant part has. He has been sitting around in this corner teh whole time, watching this oak barrel to see that it escape does not. Meanwhile, Ugliè and a student whine maker from Bordeaux have been doing all teh small, inconsequential stuff like "pressing" grapes, moving barrels around and much else of such triviality that they do Not atract teh atttention of a geynius such as Mwrrise.

But Merhiüçe a break from this teh other day took, and to Rhôme went to give a talk on Neolithic TV production. THis talk, it a triumphe was, wiht 300 people attending. Mwîrryse much worried was when he some Templars in teh Back row spotted, but tehy wery polite & attentive were. Tehy even some interwesting questions at teh end asked, so maybe they, they also scholars of prehistoric TV and Radio production were. Also, they did not try to teh talk disrupt or Mürjise take hostage, which good was.

But now, mes amis, teh big task for Mqrûße today is to continue to watch this oak barrel, as instructed by Aglìe. Also, waht to have for dinner tonight?!?!?

Finally landededed in Austr...,er, in Italy!!!!!

2009-12-10T03:28:00.000+01:00

MES AMIS!!! Despite many mis haps, and teh interference of teh Templars (who seem to be in control of teh Australialn polis enough to meke them arrest Mìruse, univesally acknowledged as teh gratest to ever live ever), Muiruise has back to his hosue & home in Italia it madde.

Mes amis, Murùse his trip back was made much quicker tahn normal thanks to a devise called a "GPS", which Mwrrwse guided back to Italia. TRUE, he fell aslepp at one point and overshot the destination, but that a minor porblem was. Maybe one of these for his car he needs!!!

Agluie & Mhyruçe have spent teh day going through teh material found on bored teh HAIRYPLANE Mjërîse borrowed from teh Templars, and much useful infromation found. No wonder teh Templars were so annoyed about Mweruse borowing teihr hairyplane. In any case, it looks good parked next to teh runway of teh Castello di Murjíse private runway, & Mujuröse it thinks he will keep.

NOW, no time for more WOBLEGGING. Mqrqçe & Aglie must run, RUN to teh vine yards & see what (if anytihng) of this years harvest they can save and make in to teh fine whines of Castello di Mwrise. Wish us luck, mes amis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Teh hairyplane... it a TEMPLAR hairyplane is... oh noes!!

2009-12-04T09:39:00.000+01:00

Despite teh porblems wiht teh planes autopilot, Mjërüse is enjoyign his flight back to Italia. That's right, mes amis, Merèse changed route has & to Italia is goingk, not France. This is because once again he rembered that he had to meet old old ami Aglie to discuss saving whatever we can of teh grape harvest, and make teh bestest wines that we can for Castello di Mereiuse.

ALso, Merè∫e has made some discoveries about teh plane he "borrowed". Teh GOOD discovery is that this plane, it has a GPS Unit!! Wiht MAPS!!! SO now he can his way much easily find.

Teh BAD news is that this hairyplane, it belongs to Templar Airways!! Tahts right mes amis, this hairyplane, it owned by teh TEMPLARS is!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh noes!!! This it wery much bad news is -- teh TEMPLARS might be tracking Merìuse!!!

On the other hand, mes amis, it much good to borrow a plane from teh Templars to escape from teh Templars, no? ALso, they much ... interesting material have in teh hold of teh plane, including several BOXES of books and papers, Templar regalia, boxes of Templar gold & jewelery, and a few Templar computer systems which Mweurjyse with Agly will examine WERY, WERY carefully. Merîuse will keep you up to date wiht ALL teh news about teh secret Templar plots about which he out finds out.

Greetings from sunny HAIRYPLANE!!!

2009-12-03T04:10:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, Mweruise is once again flying a hairyplane. But this time, it not a 747 is. It a Piper PA-31T is. But let me explain, mes amis.........

Mweruse finally managed to get back to his hosue & Home in Paris, NSW, Australia. He there much work on teh garden had been doing, and was also planning his return to Italia so he could work on teh grape harvest wiht Aglie. But then, teh Federal Police, acting on teh instructions of teh Templars managed to Mjerwuse track down. Once again there was some rubbish about stealing a truck and escaping custardy -- all lies!!!!!!!!. Luckily Merèse able to escapeinate was, by locking teh front door and running out teh back door whilst teh polis, tehy were teh front door tryign to break down.

Thinking quickly (well Mérèçe a geynius is), he was able to teh hairport get, where he a Piper PA-31T could borrowinate. He was not able to teh owner of teh plane ask, but Mwewrwise is CERTAIn he/she would not mind. It am emergency was, and Mereuse a grate geynius is..

This annoyed teh Templars no end, all they could do was stand on teh run way and their fists shake. Horray! Le genius (Mjerîse) escaped again!!!1!

Of course, the escape it not wihtout problems was. Despite looking all through Mërjüise his bag, this teh only map he could find was:

There a few porblems wiht this mappe are, such as teh fact that it Australialialilaulai;la does not seem to show, but Merûse thinks he will his way back to Paris, France wiht it be able to find.

At teh moment, he has teh hairyplane in "auto--pillot" mode put (not that ANY comptutor could FULLY replaace teh geynius of Merweçe as a pilot), so now Mwereiuse he time to check his email has & could now wobleg posts write (such as this one!!!1!!). More soon, mes amis, as Merîuse continues his amaazing plane flight....

The whines of Castello di Mjurhyse -- oh noes!!!

2009-11-26T00:00:00.000+01:00

Oh noes!!! Myerüise his telefone just was ringing, and THIS time he decided that it, it he would answer. And it was his bon ami Aglÿ! He much plesaed to him from him hear, and wanted all teh news of his Templar inwestiginations in Europe about hear. But alas, Aglie had a reminder for Myrÿrse that not good was. He asked how teh harvest & whinemaking at Castelo di Mèrése was along getting. This was a shock to Meruyse, he had about this FORGOTTEN COMPLETELY!!!

Ugliè is much worried that teh grapes, tehy will have already rotted on teh vines, and no good be. But Mierwose, he is hoping that maybe some will be O.Kay for a special late harverst dessert whine.

Well, mes amis, Mjÿrïse he will to Italy wonce more next week be going back, & seeing if he can rescue some of teh grpe harvest *& some good whine make. Wish Meruseise luck!!!! not that it he will need, he a geynius is, and for a geynius anything is posible.

Enjoying wonce more being in Paris, NSW, Australialaiaialailialia

2009-11-24T13:03:00.004+01:00

Mes amsis, meriuse is once agian in his hoseu & home in Paris, Australia. And he much busy in teh garden has been, it wery messy was because even though he payed for a gardener to much work there do, this gardener did not teh weeding do AT ALL!!! Who could be as stupid as to forget to do key work in teh garden such as weeding or picking fuits?!?! Also, Muiwjruse seems to about 50 missed calls from his bon ami Aglie have, he wonders what he Mjeruse is trying to call about.

But also there bad news has been. Last night, Mherwse went to his whine cellar here to a bottle of 1974 Romanée Conti himslef for dinner to get, but found all his wine has been taken, and replaced with

Clos des Templiers, Pomerol
Château les Templiers, Lalande de Pomerol
Château Templiers, Pomerol
Viuex Château des Templiers, Pomerol
Château la Croix des Templiers, Pomerol
Les Chevaliers des Templiers, Saint-Julien
Château les Templiers, Saint-Emilion
Caves des Papes Côtes du Rhône Duc d'Aiguilhon Réserve des Templiers, Côtes du Rhône
Cellier des Templiers, Languedoc
Les Templiers Vin de Pays, Languedoc

Mjeroise, he much dejected was and had to have TWO (2) bottels of 1965 Clos des Templiers just to make up for his disapointment. He wonders what could have happened.

Eh bien, tomorrow Mherouse is going for a dirve in his ToYota hilux. Maybe he will look for a vine yard to buy in this region, to expand teh empire of Castello di Mjeruse!!

Arrivinated in Sudney, still on route to Paris, Australiaa

2009-11-04T11:33:00.000+01:00

Well mes amis, your correspondent most bold has finally in Sudney arrivinated, after a most eventful journey!!

As in Maelbourne, he was up by teh polis pulled up shortly after here getting, and again they mentioned some rubbish about custardy but when Mjuerose it offered to discuss over dinner at a fine french restuarant, they most raisonable were. SO, now, after a dinner most fine Mjwerose apparently he has nothing to worry about.

Which a relief is. The journey , it much eventful was!! Those who Mjerose on Twitter follow, will know that he ran across some kanjaroos wiht 3 inch long blood dripping venomous fangs that wanted to Mjerhyse eat wery much. Luckily, Meruçe his HSV Mallo wery fast is and he able to away get was. When he found teh Perth highway, he much glad was and a bottle of 1979 Chateaû Lafite opened and swigged it from teh bottle whilst dirving along as a little treat!!

Mewrüse has since herd from his good freind, teh eminant zoo-o-oligst Mr. George Bentham that these kangarros, they were teh rare species Macropus venenum, or Lesser Spotted Poison Fanged Kangaroo. Aparently there are few reported citings of them NOT beacuese tehy are rare and people do not them see often, BUT because most people that them sight are EATINATED by teh kangarrhos! Meurise to escape lucky was.

Eh bien, Miúruîse much glad to in Sudney be. He will in his Sudnay apratment for a few days, and then to his hoseu & home in Paris Australiaaia will go to rest & relax.

More soon, mes amis!!!!!!!!

Not again, mes amis.......

2009-10-27T14:08:00.000+01:00

Well, mes amis, Mweruise he is now OUT of Melborne at high speed dirvinating, just to make this wobleg post stopping. Mes amis, it seems that the polis here also in teh control of teh Templars are!! Just as Miuerÿse was just starting to a few promising leads about teh templars get, he was by teh polis wonce again over pulled.

They said something about "escaping custody" and "arrest warrent" when they Mjueruse recognised, these must Templar things be!! Luckily Mueruse managed to get away. he pretended (again) that his dirving licence was in his car's glovebox, and when he back into his car got to "retreive it", he instead away at high speed drove. Phew! What a Lucky Escape for M. Murise!!

Well, mes amis, Mërhuse he is now heading for his old home Town of Paris, Australia. He is certain that THERE,, THERE the polis will not have by teh Templars have been infiltrated!

Finally arrivinated in Melborke

2009-10-26T10:49:00.000+01:00

Mes amis, Mjewrhyse after such a long dirve he has FINALLY in Malborne arrivinated. mes amis, Mwrwçe he such a bad time in Adelaïde had, where Templars posing as Polis Men him tried to arrestinate!!! On fake, made up charges!!!1! But luckily, Miueruyse a geynius is, and so was away able to get.

Well, mes amis, Mwerwise is certain he much exciting things about teh Templar conspiracies will in Malbork find. Melbourne, it is a city of Templars! As it named after Malbork in Poland is, it MUST be. Fear not , mes amis , Mweruse will keep you postinated about his inciting discoveriesese!

Free! Escapinated!!!

2009-10-19T13:22:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, Mwereuises audacious escape plan has to fruitiion come!! HE is FREE!!!

Well, mes amis, your correspondent most magnifique was sitting in his polis cell thinking about teh Templar plot that had brought him there mostly unjustly on flase charges (stealing a truck, dirving wihtout a lisesnse, speeding, assualitng a polis officer). These all rubbish were, and non-true!!! But such a grate geynius as Meruise would not the Templars let win! No, mon ami!! Mjerrouse just looked in his pockets, and found some string, some sugar, some tinfoil, some salt, and some ammonium phosphate fertiliserr (he plans to do some gardening when he gets back to Paris, Australia!!!). With tthese, he was able to make a small explosive devise, which he used to blow a hole in the wall. He was promptly then promptly able to promptly escape promptly.

Well, mes amis, Mwiioruse for a bit ran to away get. But this, it not suited for such a grate geynius is!! Miuwrüse would have liked to buy another Mack truck, but alas this, it not possible was. So as a second best, Meårhyse a Pickup Truck himself bought. To be precise, he a HSV Maloo himself bought. With this, he much pleased is.

The salesperson said to Meruise that "this car, it can to 271.444km/h acceleratinate, which much impressive is. Not that you'll be diriving that fast on teh road, eh?". ANd Mirrîse laughted and agreed that no, he would not be! But then when he drove out of teh car dealer shop at 140km/h, he thinks teh dealer would have got the impression that in fact Maerose WAS at 271.444km/h going to be dirvinating!!! But sadly, so far only to 270.00km/h have so far gottinated.

Mes amis, Mwerrose is now to MElbrone dirving. He must hit teh road again!!@!

Arrestinated

2009-10-19T08:05:00.002+02:00

MEs amis, bad news!!! Your bold corrrespondant, Mwrhyçe de Perfosswr, has arrestinated been by teh Polis in Adelaïde, South Australaialaialia!

But first, teh details. Mes amis, Merrhyse has much about a secret Templar cell in Adelaïde been out findinating. He even managed to infiltrate teh Masons head quaters, and there found out much that was wery interesting. But the polis here, they must be under teh control of teh feindish Templars!!! This afternoon, whilst Muarhywse was around Adeláïde drivinating, he was by teh Polis pulled up.

They claimed he was "speeding" becuase he was at 120km/hour drivinating, even though this much slow is. THEY claimed that Mwroyse should at 50k/hour driving been, but this, it rediculous is!!! Then they looked on their comptutor, and claimed that the truck that Merrôse dirving was was STOLEN! They it claimed it stolen from Sydney airport had been some weeks ago!!!1! Well, Mweriouse camly tried to explain that it his truck was, and that it at Sudney airport had been for him left instead of Mowerhyse his Lamborghini due to a Mix Up, but alas they would not Merewse beleive.

THEN, they asked to see Muiwrrhyse his "dirvers lisence". Still, Merwwyse remained wery calm. That polise man had no excuse for trying to punch Mwerrhyse back. He explained that he, as a geynius, did not NEED a dirvers liccense, but alas they him would not beleive but instead him arrestinated. At this point, I (Mwrwuyse) realised that this, it must a TEMPLAR plot be. The TEMPLARS will stop at NOTHING, NOTHING mes amis to STOP mjewruse form them exposing. STill, teh polis did not THAT annoyed have to get, Merruse only slightly punched and bit one of teh polis offisers, and only one (1) of the polise cars was beyond repair demaged!

But do not fear, my bon amis. Mwerewwrse a BOLD PLAN for escapinating has, and will blog more when he free wonce again is!!!1!

Morriçe in Adelaïde!

2009-10-14T12:22:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, as you all might from my Twitter-based Tweet (or on Faceboook) Mhuwryse arrivinated in Adelaïde on teh 12th, and now several days here has spent.

But do not think that Murryse has just spent his time eating at teh art gallery cafe or drinking cofee on Melbroune straet -- he much inwestigating has been doing! Teh templars, they much active in Adelâïde are, & Mjewrhyse teh geynius will a full account of their plotting & planning will make.

Myruçe this wery difficult thought it would be , but it is not!! They do not hide them selves much here. There even a Masonic Lodge on North Terrace is!!! IN public view!! Incredible. Mirrhuse KNOWS That teh Templars must meet there, so he will try to it infiltrate.

More soon, mes amis.........

Graetings form Perth

2009-10-07T13:42:00.000+02:00

Well, mes amis, Mhwrÿse was just beginning to get used to this "Daylight Shavings" thing in Coober Pedy. Just, though it still not good is. Well, he now in Perth is. What a drive it so far has been! Merriçe, he did not rememember that teh dirve from Sindey to Melbourne, it so long was!!1! Still, Mÿrouwçe he sure is that he in Melbroune will wery soon now be.

Anyway, he enjoying his dirve much has been, and he has teh Truck been likinating. he thinks that this, maybe it he will keep!!! He thinks it a wery good way for a geynius like Mjeruuse to around get is.

Mes amis, teh ONE , little porblem Mwaruise has been havingk is to remember whether in Australialaial they on teh right or teh left hand side of teh road drivinate? A trivial detail for a geynius like Merese, but one which bothers him still. Still, for teh moment he alternating between teh two is. ONE of them, it right has to be!!

Driving from Sudney to Melbrourne....

2009-10-03T08:30:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, Mhwrujse he currently is from Sudney to Melbrone drivinating. And yes, he still a TRUCK is drivinating, as his Maserati it not at the airport waiting for him was. But Mÿrÿhse, he finds he is almost enjoying a truck drivinating! He is sitting up wery high, watching teh scenery flash past and listening to teh non-geyniuses chatter on teh CB Radio. Almost fun, mes amis, even for a geynius like Mwruise. For some raison, Mjerowse feels he should teh trukc stop & get out & buy a plaid shirt and a baseball cap. This, it much chic would be. But alas, their time is not!!! And berets, they Mur®üse suit better.

Alas, teh trafic here is wery, wery slow still Mjewrowse has managed to dirve at at least 170km/h for most of teh trip so far. At one point he thought he a porblem wiht teh truck had, when he started seeing blue flashing lights in teh rear vision mirror and heard a weird wirring noise. But what ever teh problem was, Mjerrouse knows not. It quickly disappeared after he spead up to 250km/h for a bit. SO whatever teh problem was, at least it temprorroary was and away just went.

Car woes

2009-10-03T02:39:00.002+02:00

Well, mes amis, Mjerhowse has in Sudney arrivinated, and has just teh hairyport left. Mjerüse had to teh plane flyinate for much of teh way, and kept forgetting what buttons in teh cockpit did. But ewentually he rememememebered. AND he able to land teh plane much safely & smoothly was, and teh passengers they all Mjerose clapped.

TRUE, he scrapped one of teh wings of teh plane on teh runway for a few hundred metres, and one of the wheels broke off BUT Mjerhwuse he has not on An Atterrissage Forcé flight been where this did not happen, so teh other passengers they mind did not. The pilot even said, "Monsieur le Genius, even I could not have landed teh plane so well", and Mjer∑se he to modest had to pretend to be. But of course it is true, teh Pilot, he not a geynius like Mauooruse is.

But when he went to his Maserati collectinate, there a problem was!!1! There NEITHER his Maserati Quatreporte or his Jaguar XKR there was!! Mherjuse the genius (that is, me) had specififically instructed that his Maserati was to be at the hairyport there for him waiting. But it was not! Instead, there a Mack Granite truck there was:

Well, this, it Muerjhyse le genie much disttressed did! It, it not quite teh same as his Maserati or Jaguar is! Also, he found he teh key for it did not have, and neither anybody he asked did!! A catastrophey! But luckily Mhwrwse a geynius is, so it to start and drive off was able to, using a key he made from a chocolate wrappers tin foil.

WELL, mes amis, Meruse no time to waste had! He in his new Mack Truck the road hitted, and to Melbroune now driving is. He will himself a more suitable car there once he ther is will buyinate -- maybe another Rolls Royce?!?!

This is your capitain speaking....

2009-10-01T15:14:00.001+02:00

Well, earlier Mhwrÿse he too soon spoke. He joked that maybe they would him teh plane ask to flyinate!! But then, both teh Pilot AND teh Co Pilot, they teh Bœuf bourguignon for lunch had, and now tehy BOTH food poisoning have. As does any body else who was not as wise as Mjerüse, who teh Bouillabaisse had.

Well, mes amis. No time for more blogging or twitterittering. Mheruse has a plane full of people to fly! Wish him luck!!! Not that he it needs, he anything can do as he a GEYNIUS is.

Flying Atterrissage Forcé

2009-10-01T14:33:00.002+02:00

Well, this flight so far it much good has been & wery uneventful which good is.

Unfortunately the crew they have teh inflight film to stop had to just now (teh Film it is Teh Bakers' Wife which they a new release claim is but Mjerose, he is skeptical). The right side engine has caught fire AGAIN, and now teh co pilot must climbinate out on teh wing wiht a fire extinguisher and it put out. Hope he it does soon, Müerîyse lunch wants. heard it's Bouillabaisse, an now Mehrhwse wery hungry is.

Eh bien, Mjeruse can now see that the good co pilot has teh engine fire put out, & is walking back towards the door. Ah, now he's in, apparently lunch it can be servinated.

Oh, apparently they now asking passengers for sticky tap are, as the pilots yoke it has fallen of & he it needs to stickytape back on again, so that he safely can continue to flyinate teh plane. They asking people this are as lunch they serve. Lucky Mjerîse has a roll of Duct tape wiht him has, and so this he can them give. Why do lesser minds always rely on geniuseses like Mjeroîse to everything for them do?!?! What next, mes amis?!?!? WIll they Mjérése ask to pilot teh plane for them?!?!

Mejrÿße le geynius, blogging LIVE from his FLIGHT to AUSTRALAIALAI!

2009-10-01T10:32:00.001+02:00

Mes amis, Mjerhise is EVEN NOW in flight to Australiaialialai. It seems , that as part of a bid to "make Atterrissage Forcé seem as if it were a safe, comfortable, modern airline" (to their PR material quoteinate) they have now free WIFI internat on their hairyplanes have installinated. And about this Mjereuse much glad is.

Well, he on his way home to Australiaiailaialialailailllailailaia is. And wonce he is there, in Melborne & Adelaide he will for secret Templar cells look. As it a much delicate & secret operation is, he will LIVE updates by twitter be sendininating! Rember Mjerÿhse his twitter user name: it @mauricelegenie is!!1!

After this, he to his hosue in Paris, Australialia will for several weeks go for a nice relaxing rest, before to Paris going & a few weeks in his cosy flat on Rue Mouffetard spending. At teh moment, he is thinking he will not go back to his Castel in Italy until next January, he wants to Christmas in teh South of France spendinate.

WELL, Mjerhyuse he must stop typing as now teh brake fast teh air stewardesese are around bringing. Looks like it coffee and croissants is. Mjerwse, he hopes that his croisssants arent burnt & too hot and his coffee weak & too cold are, like that gentleman in teh row in fron of him....

Packinating

2009-09-30T05:57:00.000+02:00

MEs amis, Meriçe is in a frantic frenzy, trying to many things pack for his forth coming trip back home to Australaialia. But what to pack?!? Even though he wonce again Atterrissage Forcé Ultra-Premium Executive First Class will be flyinating, there a limit to how much baggage he take can.

WELL, given that he to find secret Templar groups going to find is, he many books about them needs. HMM, he must a copy of this book take. It "Auf der Entdeckung der derzeitigen Existenz des alten Templer Plots" by Kergeusklik Typerys (published in Athens in 1765 was), most waluble has been for Mjerise his work on discoverinating about teh Plots most fiendish of Teh Templars. Mjerûse an orginal copy has, which his bon ami Agly kindly him gaveinated.

But what else? His camera, yes. His cell phones, yes. His satelite phones, yes. His Templar disguise (to blend in when under cover, mes amis!). Hmmm... he will to continue to think have to.

ANYWAY, he tommorow to Sudney flyinates, where he will his Maserati Quatreporte pick up & in to Melborne will drivinate. Then he will there for Templars, look, and also he a short side Trip to Adelaïde will makinate, as he a tipp off had has, that there many Templars in Adelaïde are. Once he this has done --- THEN, a short trip to his OLD HOME TOWN, of Paris in North Easter New South Wales for le genie (ie, Me, Mjereße) to rest & relax will have.

OH YES!! Mjeroise he nerely forgot. RED BERETS! Mjyeruse must himslef plenty of red berets packinate!!!1!

Graetings from SUNNY ESPANIA!!

2009-09-25T13:27:00.000+02:00

Well, mes amis, it soo loooonng has been since a wobleg post by that grate geynius Mjeroise has been, that you my most devoted raeders might well have though that Mjerh¥se he kidnapped & being held hostage by teh Templars was!!!1! But no, that it did not happen. Murise teh Templar hostage takers outsmartinated.

Well, teh truht is that Mjerwse he so busy been has that he a wobleg post has not time to post had. AND yet, he now in His Castle in spain is, so now he a wobleg post can write.

Well , mes amis , Mhirrwse now a nother castle in Italia owns. THIS one, it a TEMPLAR castel in Purugia, Umbria is:

http://www.castles-for-sale.com/sale/Perugia/index.htm

And it much pretty is. But of more importance, are teh hidden Tunnels and rooms, which of Templar secrets and documents filled must be!! As SOON as M. Aglie can to Italy get once again, we will through these secret passageways explorinate. Mhyrwise, he sertain is that many Templar plot related secrets they uncover will.

But now, he injoying his castel in Spain is, ANd it much beautiful is. This one, it one of teh porperties that he from his Rich Unlcle Pedro also inheritinated.

Well, it not all fun&gmames is, despoite what it might like look! Next week, he will to Australiaiaialai flyinate, to chase up teh possibility of a Templar group in Melbourne <-- wish Mjerîse luck wiht this difficult & dangerous mision!. Then he a few weeks in Paris, Australialai will spend to rst&relax.

Castles in Spain. And Italy. And SPain.

2009-08-23T06:58:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, Mjerise has not so much to this time report.

Agli, he is going to Germany for a few weeks and then is to his home going. Leaving Méréçe alone wonce again. WELL, This it worries Mhwrwyse not one little bit! No, mon ami, Merhyse has much to do planninated.

He has ANOTHER ex- Templar castel in Italy lined up that he himself wants to buyinate. This, it will much wiht his work in decoding teh templar plots help. Also, in a week or sos time he will teh Castel in Spain that his late Uncel Pedro to Mjerhise left go and see too. mjerhüse, he wait cannot to all this see!

Also, Mherhyse has much exciting things plannedd for his whine Castello di Mewrrüse. He is certain it the bestest wine ever will be, so much place on his mantleplace is clearing for all teh awards it will win. Even so, Agly said it much important to a business plan have is. HERE is teh busyness plan of Mjerîse (genius):

Make wine.
Sell wine.
...
Profit!

It a GREAT plan is, befitting such a grate geynius as Mjerrhyse, no?

Adwentures at Casttelo di Malbork

2009-08-15T14:58:00.000+02:00

Àglîé is to Rhôme dirving today for a day trip to Rhôme today (by car). Good day for Mjerowse to a wobloeg post writinate!!

SO, Aglie & Merjuse le genie to Malbork drovinated in teh Alfa Romeo GT 3.2 V6. Here the route they took is:

View Larger Map

Aglie, he says it OBVIOUS is that he teh driving took over after Lisbon, but Mjerose it cannot see why! Nor can he see why Agly his route says more direct is!!

ANYWAY, though teh dirve from Lisboa it much slow & tedious was we there in teh end got. Agliè & Mhereçe pretendinated to be normal tuourists, and were let into teh castel after merely paying teh entry fee! Templar security standards, they must have slipped over teh last few hunrdred years!!! Anyway, wonce inside Mjerîse found many exciting things about teh Templars secret plots on these so-called "Information Boards". Uglie said that these just for tourists are, but Merese is not so certain. Also, Aglée a Templar manuscript by teh moat foundinated, which he in his jacked pockete hidded. We some useful things out found mes amis, trust Mwrüse on this!!1!

Anyway, once we looked around had we teh meeting wiht teh Templar Grand Master had. We in teh appointed time & Place waited (next to teh Moat, 11 pm), but him could not see. Then, he out of nowhere appeared & us in teh moat pushinated!!! Luckily we both swim can, & Aglié teh precious manuscript in teh car had leftinated. BUT it, it shows that we onto something must be!!! Otherwise, teh TEMPLARS, they such desperate measures would not try! But we stopped will not be in this method (BRIBERY, now that works!! Anything above $1Million in unmarked us dollars pelease).

Wonce Mhwrûse & Agly had off dried, tehy into teh car got & AGLY back to Italy us drove. This, Mjerowse protested about: he to drive wanted!! Aglie so slow drivinates!!! TEDIOUSNESS!! BORINGNESS!!! SLOWNESS!!! But alas, even though Mereose argued for teh whole trip it no good was, he insistinated.

Yesterday, we teh vines here at Castello di Meråese inspected. Aglie, he thinks this year it should wery good be. Mjerøse he agrees -- teh whine of Castello di Mqrqse, it teh GRATEST WHINE EVER, EVER will be!! More on that one later.

Back home at Castello di Mjewrhyse!

2009-08-04T12:50:00.000+02:00

Well, it much to much long been has since here Mjerise here postinated. Well, he to Castello Malbork & Back has been. It much slowness was, as Aglie on driving he insistinated. Not good! Much slowness!!

But that, it not teh WORST bit of teh trip was. Teh meeting wiht teh Templar Gradn Master, it well did not go!! Mjeroise, he cannot about this now write but soon he will do so.

Eh bien, it good to back at Castello di Mjérése is!! Home safe & suond!!

The discoviries of Mjeriése (genius) at Castello di Muwrhèse

2009-07-17T13:15:00.002+02:00

Mes amis, your bon ami Mwrwse has for too long promisinated to a wobleg postinate about some of teh discoweries most exciting which he & Agly at Castello di Merese foundinated. Well, mes amis, it tru is, they much excitinating have their foundinated. Mereise, he knows not where to begin (even though he a grate geynius is!!!).

Mjereose & Àglìè they have foundinated at Castelo di Mjerwsoe:

a secret hidden library with thousands of books straetching back to AD600;
a secret Templar chapel;
several paintings that Aglie he estimates that they from 1200AD dateinated;
three life size solid gold sculptures of people
a treasure room full of assorted gold coins, gold artefacts & jewelery (including a few crowns, in which Mjerowse much fetching looks!);
HUNDRED and HUNDREDS of secret passageways, rooms and chambers. Some with traps, and pitfalls and other things which much freindly were not!!!

Amongst the books was teh 8th century book, full of full of secret Templar hystery and secret World Domination plans which Algie foundinated. All these books have helped Mjerowse (& his side kick Agly) to asemble teh secret histry of teh Templars, and how improtatn Castello di Mjerrowse was to them & to their (successful!!) plans tow wrold domination achievinate.

It turns out that there a Templar castle on this site has been since at least 200 BC, wiht mentions of it in the oldest manuscript " Piani segreti di devoti cristiani Cavalieri Templari" ( "Secret plans of the devout Christian Knights Templars" ), which mentions teh castel having been built recently (well, recently when this manuscropt it was written, in BC 200!!!).

Mjerose & Agly have agreeinated to sell a few select items that they need do not, which Mjerrowse much money will make. This useful will be!!

Also, Mwehrose Agly teh letter that Mæræhyse had from teh Templar grand master receivinated, and of it Aglie much excitinated was!! Teh Templar grand master wants to us some important secrets about teh Templars tell & arranged to us at Malbork Castel see. Aglie much excited was, as he there wanted to go anyway.

SO, mes amis, TOOMORROW, we in to teh car will get & to Malbork drivinate. Much exciting things are bound to happen, mon amis. Watch this space!!!!!1!

Porperty Portfolio - Updatinated

2009-07-13T10:38:00.001+02:00

Aglie has just Mjerrose been showing Mjerése a 8th century Templar book, full of secret Templar hystery and secret World Domination plans.

It much exciting was, and Mjerîse thinkinates that they much about teh Templar plots can out findinate. ALso, it teh land on which Castello di Muruse was on built it mentions, which much exciting is.

On teh same subject, Mjereóse has been think wonce again about his porpetry portfolio. SO FAR he has,

in France -

A château near Arles in teh South of France
A château near Armidale in teh North of France
An appartment on Rue Mouffetarde in Parys

In his homeland, Austaliaia:

A modest hosue in his dear little town of Paris, New South Wales
An apratment RIGHT on teh harbour, near teh Harbour Bridge, in Sydney

In Italy:

Castello di Maurice, near Genzano di Roma
An Appartment on teh Campo de' Fiori

In USA:

His Apratment in Greenwich VIllage, NY City, which he from his rich unle Pedro inheritinated

In Argentina:

An apratment in San Telmo, Buenoes Aires
A HUGE ranch in teh countryside
BOTH of which he inheriniated from his rich unle Pedro inheritinated

Spain:

An porperty in Spain whihch he is yet to visitinate, also from his rich unle Pedro inheritinated

Well... maybe this is enough houses for now. FOR NOW. But Mjeroése also a hosue in Montreal, Canada wants, and maybe a BIG house near Melbourne, Australia

More grate whines that will come from Castello di Máwrjice

2009-07-13T03:16:00.005+02:00

Mjerowse le genie, he is up still makinating labels for his whines most magnifique ( not yet made, but will be soon! ).

This, another whine in his flag ship range of Castelli Romani DOC whine is. But this one, it is white! And made with botryised Vermentino, another of teh graps Aglie he recently found growing in a wild, untended part of Castello di Mawrises vineyards. It called "Sacra Piramide" is called as the amber-yellow grapes of this varariety grow in pyramidal bunches. It also references a secret Templar plot from the 16th century, about which Agliè Mjewrwose has been telling recently -- but sshhh, it still much secret is!!

Also, Mjeröwse will a range of varietal whines release as Castelli Romani IGT whines, including

Alas, all teh Vermentino will as Sacra Piramide be used as making, so he no IGT wersion can of it makeinate.

Welll, mes amis, look forward to seeing these whines in your local whine store ANY YEAR NOW, because they whines of grate geynius will be !!!1!

The Grate Whine of Castello di Murhyse

2009-07-12T16:39:00.004+02:00

Mes amis, even wiht the excitement of all the exciting discoveries at Castello di Maurice, do not think that Mjerose or Aglie are not about this years wine thinkinating. M. Aglié has Mjerowse much advised been givinating, and will wiht this years wine making help, once Mjarwose has had teh grapes harvestinated.

Mjerowse, he inclined is to decline help -- he is a GEYNIUS, he needs help from no others! But maybe, just maybe, the non-genius might be able to help the genius bring teh true extent of his geynius to light, wiht some advice & guidance on how to do this new thing that Mjürüse has not before tryinated.

In any case, Mjeroîse & Aglie last night a LABEL designinated for "Il Genio del Vino", Mjérøse his FLAGSHIP whine. The wery name explains explanitorially how it expresses teh GEYNIUS of Mjérose le genie! The one bad thing is that Aglie, he insistinated that HIS name also alongside that of that great genius, that piinacle of intellictual grandness that is Muruse must be!! THis too much was, but eventually Mereése had to agreeinate.

Mjerøse he is sure this whine it many prizes will win, and lots will sell. It will be teh best whine ever, and everybody will love it and give Mjárøwse lots of muny. He just has to make it first. A trivial thing for such a grate genius!!!

Braekfast at Castello di Maurice

2009-07-08T07:45:00.003+02:00

Brakefast is a simple affair at Castello di Mjérhise. Despite being a great geynius, Mærhyse he often just something such as flaked corns for brækfast has. Yesterday, he bacon, eggs, black pudding, has browns, sausage, toast and coffe hadinated.

This mroning,this shows what Mjuerowse for breakfast had:

Toast, mes amis, TOAST!

Oh, and a bottel of Bordeaux whine.

Discveries!

2009-07-08T02:39:00.000+02:00

Mes amis, today Mjerhîse le geynisu and his ex-bon ami Agli have some exciting discoveries madeinated!! They have through some of teh hidden tunnels of Castello di Mjårhåse been explorinating, and much found including a secret hidden library with thousands of books straetching back to AD600, a secret Templar chapel, several paintings that Aglie he estimates that they from 1200AD dateinated, and much more.

And yet, the day it did not well begin! Agly Mjeríse woke up at 5:30 AM , a time when geyniuses mostly are in bed , and insisisted we could not any more time lose, we had to working get!! AND then, Mjwerîyse, he out of bed fell!!!! Incredible, for such a greate geynius!!! Then later that day, Mwawrwowse down a spiral staircase fell, when he over his shoe lace trippinated. Luckily he was his mobile phone holding so was able to TWITTER about it in real time as he fell!

But teh day improved when Uglie, he truffle omlettes made. Then, Mjæryse he invigororatinated felt. Then he teh door to teh hidden chapell foundinated!! And soon after, teh door to a complex of roomes which containinated teh hidden secret library!!

Still, there much more exploring to be done is. We the secret hidden cellars have yet to investigatinate. But Aglie is telling Mjérøse that this is all wery important, and must secret be kept. SHHHH!!! DOn't tell ANYONE, mes Amis!!!!!

But now, bed. Mjèrése he must sleep before teh next days excitment.

Bon nuit! À bientot!

Maurice has mail!

2009-07-04T18:45:00.006+02:00

Life with Maurice around is fun, eh? Even just opening his mail is exciting enough:

Your mail

3:17 PM (18 hours ago)
Ratatoskr Squirrel to Maurice

Hey Maurice,

Mail arrived for ya. Something from some Templar
Grand Master. Opened it, sorted it, forwarded 
it on. Lemme know if you get it, eh?

Ratatoskr.

--
Ratatoskr Squirrel
Yggdrasil, Norway
Email: ratatoskr.squirrel@gmail.com
Web: http://ratatosksquirrel.googlepages.com/


Maurice de Perfossor to me

show details 3:20 PM (18 hours ago)

THankyou my pa. I will let you know 
teh instant it Mjerése  recievinates. 
It like it much improtant sou nds like 
it is!!!

-- Maurice de Perfossor
Le plus grand génie

Email: maurice.deperfossor@hotmail.fr
Website: http://lemondedemaurice.blogspot.com/


> Date: Sat, 4 Jul 2009 15:17:51 +0100
> Subject: Your mail
> From: ratatoskr.squirrel@gmail.com
> To: maurice.deperfossor@hotmail.fr
- Show quoted text -

>
> Hey Maurice,
>
> Mail arrived for ya. Something from
> some Templar Grand Master. Opened
> it, sorted it, forwarded it on. Lemme
> know if you get it, eh?
>
> Ratatoskr.
>
> --
> Ratatoskr Squirrel
> Yggdrasil, Norway
> Email: ratatoskr.squirrel@gmail.com
> Web: http://ratatosksquirrel.googlepages.com/

What can you do with the new Windows Live? Find out

No idea what he thinks this mail from this so-called Templar Grand Master is. But can smell a fake like this miles off. Just like with Maurice! He's not a genius, sure as acorns are acorns. And that's something about with I'm VERY sure!!

Yours nuttily,

Ratatoskr.

Foie gras with sauternes, whilst relaxing in Mjérhise his Italian castle!

2009-07-04T09:42:00.001+02:00

Mjerrhyse, he in Parrhys has been. He arrived back from his HOLIDAY most magnifique much refreshed & relaxed. There he a new suit for himslef bought, as well as a number of new berets that are tres amazing, mon ami! TRES amazing!!

Then Mjuroowse he drove from Paris France to Castello di Muarise in Italy and here there now is. Toomorrooww Aglie he will be arrivinating to help le genie Mjurose teh templar histroy of teh castle investigatinate, but for now Mjuerôwse he alone is. Yesterday Mjoerrôüse had foie gras and sauturnes whine for breakfast and it much good was, Mjuerrowse he enjoyed it much. Especially wiht teh foi gras on brioche! Maybe this for brakefast will today again have!!

Photo by Laurent Espitallier

Eh bien, it a good week has been. And Mjerowse is looking forward to exploring teh secret tunnels of his castel, which he found only recently. Also, he is going to be about be be just going to be getting started with going to be negotiaiting to buyinate a new car, a TVR Cerbera Speed 12.

Photo by Brian Snelson

This car, teh engine has having 12 cylinder 7.7 litre engine, and maybe about 1,000 horses power. It, it never made commercially was as it TOO POWERFULL for people who are NOT GEYNIUSES like Mjerérwse is, but Mjerríse he thinks he can one of teh few remaining prototypes his hands on get... He will you keep posted!!!

BAck to Parys, mon amis

2009-06-29T08:01:00.000+02:00

Oh noes! Today Mjúrhwse he must back to Paris, France flyinate. He teh flight is not forward to looking, mes amis!! Still, it over in a few hours will be.

Wonce he back in PAris is, then he will a few days in his Rue Mouffetarde apartment stay to Rest&Relax. Then he & his no-longer-good-friend Aglie will to Castello di Mauruse drivinate, and for more evidence of Templar histroy look. They hope also to drive to Malbork Castle togther at some point too also!! In any case, Mjuéerhyse he will infromed you keep.

Whining and dining in Quebec!!

2009-06-26T07:08:00.000+02:00

Mon ami, Mhjerease he is around teh vineyards of Quebec enjoying dirvinating wiht his ex-bon ami Aglie.There many good wineyards are, and Mjerrese he enjoying it much is. Especially teh icewine, which Mjwrése he wonders if he can in Italy also make. Aglîe, he thinks not as in italy it not cold enough for snow and heavy frosts is -- but Máeråwse a geynius is so could of some way of doing this think. But geynius always has to wiht its doubters up put!!! Aglie was wery excitied to some Ice cider findinate, and about this to Mjæræhyse been raving ever since Mjeruse it foundinated for him.

But that the good bits is mes amis -- teh bad bits are that Aglie he much of teh diriving has insisted on doing. This it not fair is!! HE insisted after lunch on Monday. HE claimed that because Mjeråese he had a bottel of whine drunkinated, and that Mhurowse 180km/h wanted to dirve did, that this it meant that Murose not fit to drive was! Rubbish!! Such limits do not apply to a geynius like MJÁRH¥SSE!!! And Úglie, he at less than 110km/h on driving insists! Much slowness!!

Still, it good was when tehy pulled over by teh police were, as Aglie did not have to drive off at high speed -- they let him go!! For raisons that Mérése he understand cannot, this to him rarely happens, normally he distract the police has to, then off at high speed must drive.

Eh bien, tommorrow we both must to Möntrëäl returninate. Mjwerese he to Paris back flies on Monday 29th, and Áglie soon after. Mjerose cannot wait to apply what he has lernt to his vineyard in italy, and Aglie much to help has promised. Also, Agglie has suggested that him & Mhwrwse should to Malbork Castle together both go, as it much Templar history has. Mjjuwrwse hopes that this we will soon do!!!

KIDNAPPED!! by teh TEMPLARS!! At least, that the story Mjurhowse Ugliè will tell is.

2009-06-20T17:01:00.000+02:00

Anyway mon ami Aglie he is coming to Montreal to Muruse see and teh routes des vins together dirivinate arround in Mjerhyse his hired Rolls Royce. But Merrowse, he not yet to Aglie has explained why and how he teh meeting of teh secret society most secret in a hurry unexpectidly left. Muirowse, he does not want Uglie to think that Murriwse lefft as he them was fooling, and need to get away before they found out. But what to say??!?!

AHAH! That, it is it, mes amis! Mjuroswe, he will them tell that he kidnapped by teh templars was! YES mon ami, that geynius Murrowse he can see it all now -- that is why he a grate geynius is. He will them tell that the Templars kidnapped Mearrowse when the secret society mememebrs there backs were turned. This, this will let Mjuroase off teh hook. Also, it them will make think that the claims de Muirhyse, they MUST be genuine. OR why would teh templars him try to kindapinate?

Then he them will tell how Muirrowse the Grand MAster outwitted, and away got. Such a tale of genuisness, daring and great inteeligence!! It almost a pity it true is not.

Mjaerwose, a Rolls Royce Phantom, and teh Routes des Vins du Canada!

2009-06-20T02:55:00.001+02:00

Mes amis, Mjerrhîse he still in Móntréál in is, and he here for MORE than one more week is and he much excitited about this is!! Tomorrow, he for a trip along teh routes des vins wich in Quebec are whihc are region of the Eastern Townships, Montérégie, Central Quebec, Quebec, Lanaudière and the Lower Laurentians and teh region of region of Brome-Missisquoi. Mwaereawse, he wait cannot!! He is sure that he, he will much about whine making find out, which will him in his estate in italy help wiht,. So Mjerroese hhe has himslef a Rolls Royce Phantom hirinated so that he a car in wihc to therre drive has!!

And the exciting thing, mes amis, is that Mqrhyse he alone is not going! No, mes amis, his ex-bon ami Aglie will be wiht Mhurwise coming.

Aglié Mjarase on his French iPhone (phone number +33 6 err...) rang earlier this week, to find out to Mjrjuse whjat happened had after he from teh secret society secret meeting disapprearinated. Murwose, he did not want to admit that he had them tricked, and that he he from them ran away and now he porbabaly should not keep teh muny they him gave. OH no! He not any of it giving back is. Also, AGlie he useful could be in Mjorose his plan to determine teh history of his Templar castle. But now Mearwse him he does not trust. This Agley, he up to no good is.

When Ugliè he herd that Mjurose in Canada was, he to come over and visit offred. He suggested that we, we BOTH could along teh route des vins dirvinate together!! A good idea, mon ami, but Myrose teh dirving will do. He does not teh drivinrg of Agly trust -- M. Aglie at less than 120km/h drivinates!!!

Brakefast!!

2009-06-16T11:02:00.024+02:00

MES AMIS, Mjérhiüse he has just break fast haded at his hotel most magnifique in montreal where staying he is. Well, it much better than many of the other hôtels which Maerwose le genie has wiht his presence graced. For one thing, the hôtelier a grate geynius like Mjoreuse is!!

Photo by Fir0002/Flagstaffotos

Well, Mjoruse wiht teh food here much impressed is. Normally, Meorwse for brake fast often just bacon and eggs to have has. AND often even that, that he cannot get done porpelly! Well not here mon ami!! NO, mon amis, here Murise had a breakfast most magnifique!!! To start with he ha a cafe au lait and brioche, just to Mjorrrhîse up wake. Then he on to a truffle omlette moved, washed down wiht 1976 Moët et Chandon "Vintage Brut Dom Pérignon Oenothèque Blanc" Champagne, then on to caviar, smoked salmon and oysters wiht MORE of teh champagne. Thne, he had some orange juice to this wash down, then pains au chocolat and pains aux raisins wiht lots of cafe au lait!! LOTS of cafe au lait, to Mjorhese help wake up..

Photo by T. Chu

Then he decided to test M. l'hôtelier to see just how much of a geynius he is. SO, instead of talking to him in ENglish, Mjorise talked to him in ETRUSCAN, a wery obscure language wot not many poeple know. "Bonjour, comment êtes-vous ce matin?" Mjoreése asked. And amazing! M. l'Hôtelier he also Etruscan knew, and much fluent was!! "Très bien, monsieur, et vous?" he asked. Well, Maehryose this was able to answer but then M. l'Hotelier had more to say but alas even le grate geynie Muarose he not as fluent in Etruscan was.

MacBook KeyBored Problems SOLVINATED!!!!1!

2009-06-15T03:14:00.007+02:00

Mes amis, Mjørhise he was just to M. l'hôtelier explaininating how much many porblems he wiht his AZERTY keybroad having was. And M. l'hôtelier he said "I Can that fix!". Mjuroése, he did not him beleive as a fix had escaped even such a great génie as Mjorowse but still he teh computer him gave.

Photo by Sir Stig

M. l'hôtelier he said he could simply change teh keybroad layout. Mjorwse he shocked was. "What, mon ami," he said, "by ripping out teh keyborad and replacing it?" Teh hotelier explained explanitorially that this he did not need to do: He could just in SOFTWARE it change, and then the new kebyoard layout on teh keys write wiht Permanent mraker. He said it simple was -- you just teh System Preferences open. "Woah!" Mjurúse said " HOw does one this do? Does Mjeraese a screewdirver need to use to open some part of teh computer?" "NO!" he said"you just click on teh ikon here on the dock in teh bottom right hand corner of teh screen" but this it tooo complex for Mjorése was so he just smiled and nodded.

Wonce this screen much mysetrious open was, he was able to teh keyboard layout IN SOFTWARE changinate, and then teh new keys write on wiht MARKER! what an idea genius! Also, he for Mjorúwse was able to change teh language to English, when it in Breton already was!!!

Well, Mjoráse he was stariting to think he in the presence of a great geynius was! And then M. l'hôtelier he opened a bottel of whine with a corkscrew wihtout injuring himslef!! Mjurose, he normally impales his hand wiht the corkscrew when he this does (wery painfull, but only a porblem if Mjeéerhuse he WHITE WHINE is trying to openinate, mes amis!!). wOAH! This M. l'Hôtelier, he must a great geynius be, maybe even grate than Mjorose,. Mjírihse he is over awed and humbled.

Photo of corkscrew by Serge Rovenne; Photo of Burgundy bottles by Limegreen

And earlier this evening, Murüse saw teh l'hôtelier raeding Proust in teh ORIGINAL Umbrian!!! WOW!!!

Zondering qround ?ONTRÉQL111

2009-06-14T10:32:00.000+02:00

?ES Q?IS ,rhyise he is in q cqfé in ?ontréql qround sitting qnd q coffee enjojying zhen suddenly he re,bered his LOYQL FQNS ,ost loyql1 Qnd then; ,es q,is; he si,ply just HQD to q nnez zobleg post postinqte: Qnd here it is ,es q,is11

Photograph by Tango7174

Qqqqqqqqqqqqqrgh:::::: ?jurozse hqs just noticed ) he is using the AZERTY keyboqrd zonce qgqin1 Oh noes111 He zill try to type porpely from NOW ON, but it much difficult is qnd even such a greyte geynius qs Mjerêse zill mistqkes ,qke:

Hmmmm:::: getting more used to this noz mes amis.

Eh bien, Mjèrése hqs teh hiways qnd biways of Montréql been explorinqting qnd ,uch interesitng he has it found111 Especcialy teh Vieux Montréal, zhere Mhwrzyse enjoyed seeing teh Vieux-Port; teh Château Ramezay Museum qnd wandering round teh Barri Gotic.

Teh view from Mjeréqse his hôtel windoz111

Eh bien; it is true: Mjeérhjyse he thinks he himslef should qn aprrqtment here find1

Greetings from MONTREÁL, mon amis!!

2009-06-12T13:59:00.001+02:00

As some of my more observant readers might have noted observantly, Mjuwrhîse had in his diary an impromptu unscheduled wisit to Montréal for 9th- the 29th June scheduled. And it is true! He now in Montreal is, after a breif flight on Atterissage Forcé. And it tres bien is!! Murrhøwse he much ovwer joyed is to be spending time in a city so beautiful.

Also, Mjurrowhsé he has been spending time working on his book new. BUT, mes amis, yesterday disaster it STRUCK. Mürjwse he was on his LAPTOP new typing, which he in France purchasinated, when he noticed that teh keys they in the right order were note. They were

< & é " ' ( § è ! ç à ) -
a z e r t y u i o p ^ $ `
q s d f g h j k l m ù
w x c v b n , ; : =

When Mjérhîse, he expecting was

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 - =
q w e r t y u i o p [ ] \
a s d f g h j k l ; '
z x c v b n m , . /

This!! It a catatatostrophy was!! BECAUSE teh keys they were not where Mjorwse was them expecting to be, his novel most beauifil instead NONENSENE WAS!!!

Oh noes!! That many hours of work on Hrothgar's Battle: the Norse Gods and the Templar Invention of Cinema -- his book new of scholarship -- wasted has been!!! Oh noes!! WHat to do!?!?! HE to type it all again from scratch all again does not to do want!!!

Apparantly, this, this is NROMAL to have teh keys in this order in computers French. But Mjuruse this does not believe. It is a conspiracy, mes amis! A CONSPIRACY!!!!

Eh bien, for teh meantime Mjorrrowse just much happy to in Móntreal be is. He will about his stay here more you tell soon!! Also he much secrets and discoverys frim his TEMPLAR CASTLE too tell you soon has. THIS SPACE WATCH, mes amsi!!!

Arrivinated at Castello di Mjrowse.

2009-06-01T23:42:00.001+02:00

Mon ami, Mjrjse he finally at Castello di Mírh¥se is. Even touhgh he wone or two rwong turns made, yet again here in teh true tradition of le monde de mjerîse a map of his journey is:

View Larger Map

Eh bien. Even though it not the SHORTEST POSSIBLE ROUTE was, Muriose he a few nice bottles of Port wine picked up in Porto, Portugul.

And he much glad to at Castello Mjrose be wonce again. He much explorinating of all the secret hidden treasurres here has to do!!!1!

A genius on the road!

2009-05-31T11:31:00.000+02:00

So Maurice is on his way back to his castle in Italy. Anyone out there want to guess just how many stupid, obvious wrong turns he'll make along the way? Or at least how much time he'll spend driving the wrong direction? No? Eh, can't blame you. Oh my gosh, but that Maurice fella just can't navigate. Safe to say the answer to both is "LOTS". Hope he misses Norway this time. Don't want to have to meet up with that so called "geynius" again. Oh boy. Being his PA is hard enough without having to meet the man.

Eh, just got to sort his mail then send it on to him. NO idea what he does with it when he gets it. Eats it, for all I know.

Yours squirrelishly,
Ratatoskr.

Return to Castello di Maüris!!.

2009-05-30T07:23:00.001+02:00

Mjorwíse he woken up has after a good night s sleep (though he did some how manage to pour spill hot chocolate all over Murjhóse himslef -- not good, mon ami, not elegante!).

Well, now he teh road wants to hit, and so in a munute he will to his Bugatti Veyron go, and to Castelli di Maúryße drivinate. Wonce there, he will its secrets fully be able to discover fully.

Méjrioce le genie, he not even time for brakefast yet has had yet, but eh bien he will brakefast on teh road buyinate -- maybe un café au lait and some croissants. Mmmm... croissants.

Photo by ana branca

Mjérêse killer jet lag again gets.

2009-05-29T18:51:00.015+02:00

WOAH!!! Teh JET LAG, it has just Mjruse hit just now and it is KILLER JET LAG is!!! He must sleep now mes amis.

First, Murríse must himslef a hot chococolate make, and to bed go. Even tough it only 17:30 is!!!1!

Photo by Stephanie Watson

Well, he himslef cannot awake any longer keep. He so tired is. Must sleep.

So tired. Must sleep. Sleep must. Soo tirred!!

Excuse-moi, mon ami. Must go to bed now. Mjïrôse, he will sit up in bed and read Proust if he can. And drink hot chocolate. Then sleep (did Muerose that already mention? He remememeber cannot!!!?!).

BAck in Parys

2009-05-29T14:38:00.000+02:00

WOW! That quite a flight was!! That, it luxury defined for Mjrowse!! He was able to ask for a glass of water whenever he wanted, and it came it a glass that it was clean!!!?! ALSO, he able to buy wines and champagnes for to his meals go wiht. And the meals were not mouldy (like tehy are on Atterrissage Forcé) -- no, mon ami, the meals they much good were!

Eh bien, Mjéríse he now back in his apratment in Paris is, and he much glad to be home again is. Still, in a day fews time, he to Castello Muruse will onse again go. He has many more secrets there to explorinate. He will keep you infromed, mon ami! But his ex-bon ami Aglie, he will NOT be talking to again!! NO, mon ami, NOT after teh way that Aglie he Mj∆røse tried to lead into a trap!!! But Mrwrse, he too clever for Aglie was!! Mérjwse, he a greate geynius is.

Hmmmm,,,, Time to braek open that 1952 Château Lafite Rothschild...

Phew!!!

2009-05-25T13:52:00.005+02:00

Mes amis, it looks like once again the greate geynius of Mjérhwse has triumphed once again!! Eh bien, it is true mon ami, it looks like Mwrwyse he has an ENTIRE SECRET SOCIETY foolinated. Yes! He tricked them into thinking that he to them has Anceint Secret Templar Knowleedge them gived.

At teh moment he in his NEW apratment in New York is but wonce he this wobleg post has wrotten, he will point his web borwser to airfrance.fr and hairyplane tockets buyinate.

Oh noes!!! The tickets of First class (La Première) costinate €7,490 !! This, it much more than the frist class tockets of Atterrissage Forcé Ultra-Premium Executive First Class (wihc only cost €5.99) - -

but - - Mjîrwose he thinks after such a greayte victory,, he himslef can give a bit of a treat. JUST as a wonce off.

Also teh hairyplanes of Air France are much better than those of Atterissage Forcé --

Photo of Atterrissage Forcé plane
Photo by Rob Sinclair

and that quite a treat will be!! A whole flight without an engine catching fire!!!1!